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Post by notanotherdecade on Jul 20, 2016 12:49:04 GMT -5
CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity SeeksSerenity Hmm I know it was a couple of years ago, but how easy is the book you mentioned in the thread "Too Perfect, When being in control gets out of control" Is it an easy read? I am someone who gets stressed about control, but procrastination and old fashioned demand resistance are definitely hardwired into my personality.. An interesting thread, glad it has been bumped up,
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Jul 20, 2016 18:03:21 GMT -5
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Post by creativechaos on Jul 20, 2016 18:21:12 GMT -5
okay... regarding bedhead: i make my bed (however half-@ssed) every morning because it is my main staging area. and btw my hair is always a mess and looks like i went through a war in my sleep. (just in case no one has posted this one) staging area: any flat space that is cleared off enough so that you can use it as a place to sort through the hoarded crap that in some cases, you've had boxed up for years and don't even know what is in those boxes anymore. stash - &- dash: (kind of like crisis cleaning but can be less dire or immense - say, someone calls and they're coming over in an hour.) - shoving items wherever they will go (shoving being the operative word), preferably hidden: in closets, drawers, cabinets, shelves, under the bed etc) to make your home appear more together and acceptable than it is. maintenance: obvious, but: covering the daily basics of keeping your house clean, picked up, and dishes/laundry/kids and pets fed and cared for/mail ETC up-to-date - especially things that you worked hard to get to this place. structured procrastination: doing one task that you've been avoiding, maybe even dreading (like deep cleaning your bedroom or going through your clothes closet) that suddenly looks easy-peasy, even desirable, compared to an even more dreaded task (sometimes with impending deadlines), such as doing income taxes. When doing structured procrastination, it works best when the "desirable" task is just a teensy bit less hard or dreadful than the even more dreaded task. inspiration spot: one tiny cleared area in a sea of hoarded chaos, like the top of a nightstand - which is clean and it is calming to look at it. you defend the gain made on this no matter what, because when you are overwhelmed or hopeless, this is your inner spot of peace and hope. you vow to work to "defend your gains" in your inspiration spots, and add to the cleared space. (it's recommended that you have one in every room if the mess is really bad) so glad this thread has been bumped again
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Post by notanotherdecade on Jul 21, 2016 1:11:25 GMT -5
Thanks for the links CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity SeeksSerenity it's led me to more info on demand resistance, which is something I would say dominates my brain, Hhmmm I'll just have to remind myself not to spend so much time researching why I don't tidy,,, that I don't get round to the important stuff like tidying, decluttering and living.. my mind is a Master Procrastinator
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Apr 6, 2017 10:09:43 GMT -5
"optimism produce": The fruits and vegetables you buy with optimistic plans to use, but they aren't used, and then they rot.
Example: "Fridge needs cleaning. A lot of optimism produce in there."
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Apr 6, 2017 10:21:20 GMT -5
bumping this thread forward for newcomers.
New entries welcome. Questions and replies welcome. For reference (not for long discussions).
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H2H
Banned
halfwaytohoarder gets rid of it all!
Joined: February 2017
Posts: 2,041
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Post by H2H on Apr 6, 2017 13:11:45 GMT -5
aha..love reading the unique use of English language to shortcut descriptions to 'insiders'
every profession has them, and language shifts all the time to accommodate need
"Staging area" is a well used word in most businesses which assemble something, and my job in planning for trade shows was a 'staging area' to make sure we shipped everything needed for some distant event in a large convention hall
the BENEFIT of a "staging area" is that we KNOW it is temporary..and can be explained to outsiders/visitors as " I am emptying the bedroom for repainting" so all the stuff piled in the LR and all over is a reasonable explanation..until they come back in 11 months and see the same piles. <grin>
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Post by closetofchaos on Apr 6, 2017 22:27:14 GMT -5
"Not Answering the Door." Don't feel guilty. Sometimes we have to decide this is the answer. Most people on the other side are going to judge your squalor. So don't forget to look through the peephole first
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H2H
Banned
halfwaytohoarder gets rid of it all!
Joined: February 2017
Posts: 2,041
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Post by H2H on Apr 7, 2017 2:14:21 GMT -5
closet... no point in delaying them at door because my entire property is a dead give a way long before they get TO the front door...getting inside only confirms it.
I will apply to the wise saying " It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt"...
OR as you prefer: " it is better to be thought a hoarder than open the front door and remove all doubt"
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Post by closetofchaos on Apr 7, 2017 4:13:20 GMT -5
H2H My yard is pretty much under control. The house gets crazy still if I don't watch it. It's the little clutter; books ect.
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Post by peaceandfreedom on Apr 7, 2017 9:43:07 GMT -5
Thank you for bringing this to our attention. Great reading and wonderful insights too!
But as I started reading through this thread, I keep wondering how someone becomes "banned" here when they appear to have contributed so much?
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Post by hannah on Apr 7, 2017 18:12:39 GMT -5
Thank you for bringing this to our attention. Great reading and wonderful insights too! But as I started reading through this thread, I keep wondering how someone becomes "banned" here when they appear to have contributed so much? I also wonder what happens to the people that are active when they just seem to disappear all of a sudden. I want to imagine that they have whipped their hoards into submission and moved on to a happy place full of clean houses and no clutter!
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Post by Starting Again on Apr 8, 2017 15:28:15 GMT -5
Thank you for bringing this to our attention. Great reading and wonderful insights too! But as I started reading through this thread, I keep wondering how someone becomes "banned" here when they appear to have contributed so much? I also wonder what happens to the people that are active when they just seem to disappear all of a sudden. I want to imagine that they have whipped their hoards into submission and moved on to a happy place full of clean houses and no clutter! I disappeared a while ago for at least a couple years. No the squalor didn't disappear! I just had other things going on, and I'm a person who just CAN'T manage squalor PLUS other things PLUS posting about squalor. I didn't post much so it probably wasn't noticed when I disappeared.
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Post by Starting Again on Apr 8, 2017 16:04:02 GMT -5
My personal terminology "so far" (and ideas behind them) (taken from thread I have in Listzilla). Making an area BTIW - Better Than It Was. "MAKING it BTIW" (which is not grammatical)) may or may not "do anything for you", depending on you and your mood. But (depending on my mood) I like "BTIW" because it means progress, not perfection; because it reminds you to keep a mental picture of what it WAS (otherwise looking at a semi-clean view isn't very exciting); and because it doesn't overwhelm you with how HORRIBLE it is NOW, but rather on how much BETTER it will be in the FUTURE (when so much ugliness is in the PAST). Focus on the future, a little at a time. Note: BTIW (the acronym) may work better when it is typed than when it is spoken, since who wants to say B. T. I. W.. The thing is to have a really POSITIVE and ENTHUSIASTIC view of an area being "better than it was" or being able to say " now that's MUCH better". (Sometimes I run short of enthusiasm!) Determine your Attack Area: focusing on one view (or ugly eye-full, or what is seen in one glance, etc) and just cleaning that for a while. The view can be as large or as small as you like. If you want to bring it to 0 degrees of squalor, fine, but you can just make it BTIW. Try to remember a bit what it Was like before. (Take a photo if you like) ATTACK! I'm not good at maintaining enthusiasm and discipline, or making "grand organization plans", for a whole house (condo) or a huge pile for a long time, so I'm just focusing for now on small areas in a fairly short time. Probably I need to learn to work hard on BIG areas for a LONG time even WITHOUT MOTIVATION, but for now I'm trying this. It isn't crisis cleaning and may take LONGER than dumping everything in one staging area but it is "my way" at present (= a few days so far). Of course you can't entirely focus on one area, but have to purge from other areas a LITTLE so that main area's stuff can be moved to where it belongs. As you do this you may end up making small staging areas, but you need to keep them under control, and focus on the one area.
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Post by notanotherdecade on Apr 10, 2017 15:32:31 GMT -5
Fall out ...... that debris of currently unshelved objects which are produced out of a nuclear sized house-reorganisation..... duck and cover ....... when escaping from aforementioned fallout to hide in bed and wish the magic Geiger Elves will have depleted it overnight shock and awe ....... the reaction next morning of retuning to the epicentre. half life ....... the time it takes between thinking an item might be on the disposal list,,, and it actually making it into the bins,
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