Post by howardsgirlfriend on Apr 18, 2009 0:12:47 GMT -5
Hi! This my first posting on this site; I found you just today. I wanted to say that I was so embarrassed by my own squalor that I have watched "Clean House" and "How Clean is Your House" religously, partly to learn how to sort and organize clutter, but primarily to desensitize myself enough to face my own squalor. I watch "How Clean is your House" every day; they keep me fortified. Some day, I hope to be able to let people into my house anytime. I might not know anyone who wants to come over, but at least it would be possible.
Post by hummingbird on Apr 18, 2009 4:57:37 GMT -5
Welcome to a caring community of people from all over the world. I , myself, am brand new to this site, too. I feel like that I have found some fellow hoarders/clutterers that will understand me. I know you will fit in just fine. Come to "chat" and join us as we work together.
Your well-written post is thought provoking. And also scary, because I am often too, too tired to do the simplest maintenance tasks, like hanging up my clothes when I get home from work. I find that when I view a video depicting squalor, really upsetting squalor, it motivates me to get up and clean some part of my house. Right now I am on vacation, putting down new tile in my dining room and garden room, putting up a doggie fence with my husband for our German Shepherd, and the rest of the house is falling apart while I focus on these two tasks. I am on the downhill slide of being a "squalorholic" now, adding a full eight hours every day to the mix when I go back to work next week will not be a pretty sight! Thank you for your sharing.
Thanks Loiness for your eloquent and most informative post. Definately, EVERYONE needs to read this, even the cleanies! I remember wanting to keep everything that had a memory. It was to the point that my friend said "OMG, I think you'd even keep your dad's underwear!" We are very close, so this made me laugh, and I was not insulted at all. In fact it made me think. It was at that point that I found the old SS site, and things started to change. First in my thinking, and then in my apartment. It took years, but I finally am at a zero to one in 2 rooms, a one to a low 2 in one room, and a high 2 in two others. When I arrived at my first level Zero, I was amazed and proud! It's going to take a while, but I WILL be a zero to one in EVERY room eventually! 3g
Post by messyconfetti on Aug 23, 2009 19:41:07 GMT -5
I'm also new, and I just wanted to say I'm glad this post is here. I think I am at a level 2 squalor but people treat me the same as a level 4 I have been told I live in filth, or "How can you live like that?" been accused of having bugs and everything.
I am new as well and find this to be a well written and well thought out post. I have never been squeamish either( I have actually picked up dried dog turds with my bare hand to throw them away, washing after, of course), in fact I am fascinated by pictures of homes that are filled with clutter and filth. Looking at pictures or seeing of videos of homes in the late stages of squalor makes me feel as if I am stepping into some sort of bizarre alternate reality and possibly, this fascination may be because I can see myself in these situations, if I continue on the current path I am traveling. I used to have so much "vintage" crap. I would scrounge thrift stores mercilessly for anything cute and old. I had knick knacks on every surface, tons of vintage tableware, tiny vintage clothing that I would never be able to wear, but was planning to sell on Ebay......Nothing was better than leaving the thrift store with 3 or four bags of cool stuff. I still love thrift stores, but I have gotten so I am really careful with what I buy. I have gained so much weight, I never find anything I can wear and have ceased with the Ebay idea. The most I usually come out with is a bag of paperbacks, but I actually read them, so I think that is ok. I am not lying when I say I LOVE JUNK! My eyes glaze over as I pass a huge yard sale. I have had to hold myself back when passing "interesting" junk on the side of the road, other wise known as "trash" that some one has put out. I love to dig and discover! If I see a drawer filled with junk, I will ache to rifle through its contents. I actually used to go out with a friend and we would ride around at night looking for cool trash on the side of the road or rifle through the after hours donations at unguarded thrift stores, late at night. Oh the thrill, but that is over. That is when I only had clutter. There was no dog poop on the floor or trash everywhere at that time. Over the years, I have lost a lot of my lust for life and it takes everything I can to walk my poor dog when I come home from work, much less clean the trash up or pick a dog turd. I think it is good to look at these types of squalor. If you have not reached the late stages, it could motivate you to try harder, so that you will not end up in that situation and if you already are in the late stages of squalor, looking at others in the same situation may motivate you by making you feel you are not alone. It makes me feel empowered, because I see how level 4's have pulled themselves through, and I think that if they can do it, then I can too. We all can!
Post by messyconfetti on Aug 27, 2009 1:04:23 GMT -5
I agree with you. When I do see what the level 4's have been through I am amazed that they were able to tell themselves that they could clean it up, and actually accomplished it.
I am actually squeamish. I have a wonderful beta fish right now and even cleaning his tank kind of grosses me out and that is nothing compared to what dogs or cats would do. LOL! I have no problem with my own blood if I get hurt unless there's just a lot unexpectedly, but I love watching shows like Brookhaven Obesity Clinic or things with surgical procedures, or even Nip/Tuck but when they start showing the close-ups I get grossed out and look away.
I am guilty of loving Ebay because I live in a small town and there are so many stores here that went out of business. And I've had weight fluctuations across multiple sizes so I do have to get clothes that actually fit but also look decent.
Lion, Your statement: "I actually NEED to have squalor bother me. Otherwise, I won't clean it up!" is what prompted me to sign up here. What an eloquent post and it made me realize that I could develop a serious problem. I've been able to avoid getting past really bad Stage 1 squalor, but I really understand how easily it could happen. I can ignore clutter and dust bunnies for quite a while before I have to clean them up. Right now, I make myself do thorough cleaning twice a year (whether it needs it or not, ). However, I spend my whole vacation on it and it would be so nice to not have to do that.
Thank you for the great post and the links to the information.
Post by queencobweb on Sept 7, 2009 16:57:11 GMT -5
My mum and grandmum were squalorous. The squalor didn't bother them. They both grew up that way and so did I. I wish there were a pill I could take that would make me "hate the squalor" but I don't - it doesn't bother me that much to have a somewhat messy house. I will clean it when it gets bad, but my bad is someone else's horrorshow. I actually got better when I lived with someone who was messier than I was once. My standards changed a bit. But I still was not "cured" because basically it "doesn't bother me as much as it should", I feel. I don't get a huge big glow and sense of accomplishment when the house is clean. It feels good, great, but not touch the ceiling fantastic.
I remember wanting to keep everything that had a memory. It was to the point that my friend said "OMG, I think you'd even keep your dad's underwear!" We are very close, so this made me laugh, and I was not insulted at all. In fact it made me think.
I actually do have a couple old items of my dad's clothing. It won't bring him back from the dead, but it's all I have left. So I keep that kind of stuff, if it was a positive in my life. If it was a negative, I have learned to throw that out, along with most newspapers and magazines.
Lately it is books, toys, clothes and fabric for cloth projects that are hard. My eyes are so bad now I can't even see the needle to thread it, so I guess sewing dreams should go out the window and all the cloth with them. Maybe that should be next. Only my daughter is squalorous and likes to sew and she doesn't want me to do that...unfortunately, also, she lives with me, so we combine our stuff.
I actually used to go out with a friend and we would ride around at night looking for cool trash on the side of the road or rifle through the after hours donations at unguarded thrift stores, late at night.
Same here, dumpster diving, even pulling things out between the gaps in the "cage" of the throwaway bin outside of charity stores if I could rescue them! And driving around on garbage day to rescue anything people were throwing away that was still usable...I am not as bad as I used to be. But I have less space to spare, now, and less money to "buy space to store the stuff".
From the time I was a child, I noticed I wasn't repulsed by things the other kids were, especially girls. Worms, bugs - fascinating. I could pick them up, while the other girls ran away screaming. I thought they were incredibly silly. I climbed trees, dug holes, tried to make pottery with mud and didn't care how dirty I got. I could take a bath later. I felt sorry for mice - why did we have to kill them? Didn't they have a right to live, too? It was not until I was an adult that I learned reasons to be clean. [...] I wonder if it's genetic - maybe some of us are missing the squeamish gene.
Same here. I find gross stuff kind of interesting, have picked up and handled creepy crawlies and critters other people are grossed out by (snakes, bats, bugs, etc.). People's injuries don't bother me. I do wonder if it is genetic!
Post by dustyclutterguy on Sept 14, 2009 5:39:04 GMT -5
Paying to store junk...I can identify with that. I don't have the money to pay my taxes, go to the doctor for important treatments, and go to the dentist, but I always find the money to pay my remaining two storage unit rents. I used to have five, crammed to the max. My family lent me money to take time from work, and buy dumpster rental. I filled up two thirty yard dumpsters with the contents of three storage units. We can beat this. We must! dustyclutterguy
Post by StuffNoMore on Oct 6, 2009 12:36:59 GMT -5
Being a new member of yor great community, I just read this for the 1st time. I see now it will be a post I'll turn to frequently as a reminder. You have touched so many wonderful subjects and for that I thank you.
TOMORROW IS A MYSTERY, YESTERDAY IS HISTORY, TODAY IS A GIFT, THAT'S WHY IT'S CALLED THE PRESENT. --------------------------------------
~~Rottweilers leave paw prints on our hearts~ RIP ~~ LOUIE ~~ Oct 24, 2009 --------------------------------------
Dog ownership is like a rainbow. Puppies are the joy at one end. Old dogs are the treasure at the other.