Once upon a time, it was me and my three kitties and my part-time job. I was able to keep my house neat enough for company to stop by anytime, without panic or embarrassment. Then I started a full-time, high-stress job – but I was able to keep up with the house, more or less, by taking weekend time to clean. Then I started a wonderful relationship almost 10 years ago – and MUCH preferred to be with my boyfriend than clean on the weekends. Things started to pile up then – I would do a public room power-clean when I just couldn’t stand it any more or when having people over couldn’t be avoided.
My boyfriend warned me that he was “an indifferent housekeeper”, which I realized was an understatement when I visited his house for the first time. And now that we’re married, we are both confronting the clutter problem. He still maintains a separate house about 40 miles from mine, since that’s where his office is located. We are planning on combining households sometime in 2012, gulp. I need to get my stuff under control before his stuff moves in. And we will be going to a wedding in October and the house needs to be neat for my kitty-sitter. It’s a good thing to have a deadline that’s six months away……
I am so grateful to have found this group! I feel like I can exhale, knowing that I’m among friends. Reading the posts has given me some tears and hope for the future! Thanks to you all for the inspiration.
(As an aside, i'm something of a mama cat myself, i bottle raise orphaned kittens for rescue groups and currently have 21 in the house! )
It sounds like you are something of a BO (born organized) person who just lost her way when she got a high stress job and the routines to keep things clean fell apart.
The good thing about that is you can rebuild routines to get your house decluttered and back under control. A full time job doesn't necessarily mean a messy home.
There are lots of ways to work your way out of this and into routines, and you will find lots of hints and tips and tricks and things to try here. One i will suggest is to let go of perfectionism. Most BO or cleanies are perfectionists, like us messies. You want it perfect, so you keep it that way. We want it perfect, and can't keep it that way, so give up. When a cleanie lets it get out of control, she gives up, too, because she can't get it perfect right away.
If that is you, toss perfectionism and go for good enough, because it lasts longer.
Ask questions, find the ways that work for you, and you can do this.
It's good to have you here.
NOTE: Before you ask me, know that my answer is "No!" and my reason is, "It's for your own good!" Printed on mommy's coffee cup.
Hiya Darl. Many born organisers get completely overwhelmed when they can't cope with many things. We only have so much energy and then, poof ! It runs out. Just take things slowly and as Mimi said, don't aim for perfection. Hugz.
Welcome! Welcome! Welcome! As you work toward getting your things under control try to make a casual inventory of what you have, it will help a lot when you combine households to be able to say "Do we really each need one of X?' Pair the items, pick the one you like better, and put one in the donation box ASAP!
“Absorb what is useful, reject what is useless, add what is specifically your own.” – Bruce Lee
Post by joyinvirginia on Apr 29, 2012 15:20:45 GMT -5
HI Momcat! Seriously consider finding a pro who can help - that sounds like a LOT of physical work, and it really helps to have someone to help you focus. Or maybe you can find a healthy teenage boy who wants to earn some extra money, and would be muscle to move things for you. Keep us posted on your progress!