Margaret56 has passed on, peacefully, at home, the way she wanted, after contracting an aggressively progressing illness.
She passed away during the month of May ...I will leave out the exact date, so as to protect her privacy.
She had posted a link to her "illness blog" on Byways, but you may all have noticed that the blog no longer exists.
I spoke with her husband on the phone last night. He said that she intentionally chose not to renew the blog's domain-name -- because she knew she was going to pass away soon, and that she would be unable to do any more writing. This was part of her process of letting go.
He also told me that she was very smart, and that she knew more about her illness and treatments than many of the medical professionals that assisted her.
For those of you who saw her blog entry comment before it was deleted -- the one that mentioned positive post-treatment test results: Although the doctors had theorized from one test that the illness had possibly been reduced as a result of the treatment, *further* testing revealed that the first test was misleading. The truth was that the treatment didn't help and the illness had actually greatly quickened its progression.
Margaret accepted this with grace and courage; and, up to the end, she lived every moment with mindfulness.
She chose to burn all her clothes in the fireplace/stove, a few every day, as her illness progressed. She reasoned that she wasn't going to wear them anymore. Why not allow their burning to contribute to keeping the house and family warm? And the bonus would be that there would be no worries about what to do with them after she passed.
Margaret's interests included self-responsibility, healthy challenging debate, science, the natural world, and rural life. Her spiritual philosophy embraced open-mindedness, exploring truth, egalitarian concepts, and respect for many world traditions.
She was very intelligent and persevering, and thus learned a wide range of skills that she was able to master.
She had a lot of spunk!
Margaret has been a member of our group (and the prior Squalor Survivors forum) since June 2004. She was very active on the former forums at Squalor Survivors. She didn’t post as actively here at SOS, because she was busy working and parenting, and there was also a period of time caring for an ill relative.
She embraced the concept of "motivation follows action".
She chose not to make excuses for her difficulties.
Instead, she chose to take responsibility to set things right.
She posted that she suffered from "Ghost Squalor" ... (the instinctive sense that your home is still unworthy, long *after* you've cleaned it up; fears that undiscovered bits of shameful mess will be unexpectedly revealed; fears that your home may still smell bad or look bad to a visitor, even if you yourself cannot detect anything; a sense of shame/embarrassment that is out of proportion to reality). This "Ghost Squalor" made it nearly impossible for her to be willing to have visitors.
Margaret is being honored alongside some of our other members who have passed on ...
in our annual Memorial Purge-A-Thon that we have every June.
Every year, during the month of June, a new purge-a-thon forum is activated, and members post what they are releasing.
At the end of each June, the Purge forum vanishes, as another way to release. A new one is created the following year.
Margaret is also honored with some of our other members who have passed on ...
during the annual "November-December holidays-of=your-choice forum" --
another forum that disappears at the end of its season.
This is a time to find your own spirit of simplicity and joy and create new traditions that honor that.
You may light a "virtual candle" for Margaret at the following link.
(You don't have to *join* the candle site to light a candle.)
gratefulness.org/light-a-candle/The candle will "burn" for 48 hours and then fade out.
You can light another one when you wish.
You can light a candle there with a short name or initials indicating anyone or any memory, and then type in your own message with your candle. Anyone clicking on your candle will be able to read your message. It will be publicly-viewable by anyone, so be discreet with your comments.
ATTENTION:There will be a memorial service for friends and family in mid-June, 2012.
Margaret belonged to many online groups – and had many friendships around the world that she had cultivated for many, many years.
Margaret's husband has asked that all her online friends submit memories/tributes to her. He will read these tributes aloud at the memorial service, as a way for all her internet friends to be virtually represented.I tactfully explained the nature of this forum to him, and he was very understanding.
The suggestion is that we all post our tributes HERE on this thread.He will be sent a link to this thread, and print it out before the service.
He will read aloud whatever segments he feels are appropriate during a service with friends and family present.
[We may choose to assist him by emailing him an edited version of whatever you write -- converting it to a more "generalized" version that doesn't mention clutter/hoarding/squalor -- but just says how Margaret inspired you to "get your life together". He wouldn't want to be reading aloud anything
indicating messy-house issues in front of all the relatives and neighbors!]
" title="::RneJDSdEQAecGsiTRshw:: "]
PLEASE post your memories and tributes here!
" title="::RneJDSdEQAecGsiTRshw:: "] Feel free to write whatever is in your heart.Please reply before June 12th, 2012, if possible.
