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Post by maggie on May 27, 2013 10:03:25 GMT -5
I don't know if people normally do this, but I think if CPS was coming here, especially if I thought there was some kind of personal vendetta going on and the person might not be acting as an objective professional, I would have my own notebook and pen or even recording device and document their visit for myself -- what they say (specific instructions, threats, warnings, compliments), what they look at, and if there is anything that I think they should look at but didn't (trying to think of an example, but maybe if they make a comment about a pile of dirty clothes, but then do not check to see if there is sufficient clean clothes).
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Post by oust on May 27, 2013 12:00:33 GMT -5
HiSally
You said you can't pull the carpets cos its plywood....can you get some new'plywood from home depot or Lowes.....its cheap, and get DH to lay it for you? Or a family member. It sounds like replacing the sourse of the smell might work well for you.
And the mattress....omg I never thought of those. I bet they could go outside and have a few buckets of soapy water like tide and hot water thrown oven them then the garden hose could rinse. Put them in the sun to dry. Hope that helps.
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Post by scribbliz on May 27, 2013 14:03:33 GMT -5
matresses really do hold smells and most people don't think to clean them, because frankly, how DO you clean a matress? another thing that can cause an issue is if fabric (matress, laundry, carpets, ect) get soaked repeatedly (my twins are 4, my oldest is 6 and they all LOVE to play in water) you can get a mold smell which can smell similar to a pee smell. steam clean repeatedly, use baking soda, and oh!!! mix vinager and water in a spray bottle and spray your carpets/matresses. vinager can cut smells too.
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anonsally
New Member
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 7 
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Post by anonsally on May 27, 2013 22:46:19 GMT -5
matresses really do hold smells and most people don't think to clean them, because frankly, how DO you clean a matress? another thing that can cause an issue is if fabric (matress, laundry, carpets, ect) get soaked repeatedly (my twins are 4, my oldest is 6 and they all LOVE to play in water) you can get a mold smell which can smell similar to a pee smell. steam clean repeatedly, use baking soda, and oh!!! mix vinager and water in a spray bottle and spray your carpets/matresses. vinager can cut smells too. You must really understand my pain with the twins!! One has just recently taken to peeing on the floor for no reason. I just can't get the smell out. |
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on May 27, 2013 23:00:36 GMT -5
anonsallyhow to remove urine odors -- the same ideas for pet urine would also apply for human urine -- click on this thread for a bunch of ideas: takeonestepatatime.proboards.com/thread/8031/(you might be able to put some of those products on the mattresses to get the smells out ... and then put the mattresses in the sunshine to dry them and further deodorize. And then cover the mattresses with a plastic or vinyl something to protect them from further mishaps.) You can paint kilz or kiltz (i forget how it's spelled) onto the wood floor, to seal the bad smell under the coating. Other members can explain this further.
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Post by Layla on May 27, 2013 23:02:10 GMT -5
Is she in a diaper or underwear and peeing? Is it anywhere your twin is doing it?
Thats a habit to squash as quick as you can.
I had one of those little green clean machines when my boys were little, I used cloth diapers with those plastic type covers, but once in awhile there was an accident, but I had to get the cleaner and suck it up right away.
The mattresses, I bought those zipper plastic covers. I had a kiddo who wet the bed for quite awhile while sleeping, really had to keep on top of laundry with that, but with the mattress covered that prevented that stinky aspect, and I bought a cheap set of mattresses till he outgrew that. But yes, if needed, take the mattress outside into the sun and let it dry out there. But I do recommend the mattress cover, I actually even left the plastic cover that came with the mattress on the bed, and then put a soft cotton mattress cover on top to make it more comfy, you can wash those.
And open windows, air things out so the smell doesnt get stagnant.
What I meant with the carpet is lifting it then putting it back down. The wood will absorb the urine also, so the smell will always be there, you can put a sealant or coating down if its really bad.
I know it sounds like a lot of work, just trying to offer ideas to help.
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on May 27, 2013 23:02:21 GMT -5
I don't know if people normally do this, but I think if CPS was coming here, especially if I thought there was some kind of personal vendetta going on and the person might not be acting as an objective professional, I would have my own notebook and pen or even recording device and document their visit for myself -- what they say (specific instructions, threats, warnings, compliments), what they look at, and if there is anything that I think they should look at but didn't (trying to think of an example, but maybe if they make a comment about a pile of dirty clothes, but then do not check to see if there is sufficient clean clothes). Agree with maggie about recording. Make them give you a list of what they want, so that then you can make sure you fulfill their requirements. |
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Post by scribbliz on May 28, 2013 9:28:10 GMT -5
oh, you mentioned your twins like to take food and hide it? mine do that too, and sometimes in the weirdest places. one place they used to hide food was under the couches; ours sit about four inches off the floor on wooden legs. all kinds of stuff gets shoved under there, and honestly i don't think to clean it enough....and even when i do, sometimes i miss that half eaten yogurt container hiding way in the back. way to add smell to a home, eh? so, here's what i've done to help with that...1, schedule meals and snacks so they aren't hungry; 2, only eat at the table (great insentive for me to keep my table clear, a major issue i used to have) 3, place old boxes or such underneath your couches so they can't shove stuff under; 4, jot down the places you find food when they have hidden it, if you find repeat places make a point of checking those places on a regular basis. 5, if there is a particular type of food they keep getting at (ie, bread left on a counter, fruit from the refrigerator, ect) try to find a place to store that food that is out of reach and out of sight. i'm not sure if my difficulties have come from twins, or from having three, or just their personality types, but i've dealt with things like my twins chronically "painting" the walls with diaper content or one of my twins shredding paper into squares about one inch big (too small to pick up easily, and too big for my vaccuum!) or refrigerator raids at 3 am. some of it i'm still working on (paper shredding) and some i've managed to figure out. any help I can offer I will  the community here is really great for ideas too if you need help. |
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Post by nekomom on May 28, 2013 10:04:28 GMT -5
Anonsally, you have been given great advice. I hope that it all goes well.  |
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Post by flymomrn on May 28, 2013 10:42:03 GMT -5
Good luck. Do you have a friend or minister/support person to be there as a witness? I didn't know you could refuse to let them in. When DCS visited me, I was deathly ill and was recovering from surgery while my husband was out of town on business. My former friend called them because my son took advantage of my being sick and decided to not get on the school bus and instead was hiding in the back yard. The house was a mess, and I was a mess, but they didn't take my kids. They did visit several times and even offered help getting things organized and cleaned up. I kind of miss her coming by as I do keep things cleaner when people may stop by.
We pulled up and removed all of our carpeting and replaced it with vinyl oak plank flooring. We did it ourself and it was easy and inexpensive and looks good.
Sent from my SCH-I605 using proboards
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Post by heretoday on May 28, 2013 17:09:09 GMT -5
That is one thing I did - had someone there as a witness. She actually videoed the place before they came as proof that it was clean. Was great support for me
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Post by CaringFriend on May 29, 2013 2:16:42 GMT -5
Suggestion for the kids' mattresses........
1. Send Hubby to Wal-Mart to buy plastic mattress covers.
2. Sprinkle baking soda all over each mattress and rub it in with your hands.
3. Put the mattress covers on each bed.
4. Make beds with clean sheets and blankets.
This should help contain the smell when the social worker comes. They even sell plastic covers that envelope the entire mattress and zipper closed.
For urine smell on carpets........
1. Have Hubby spread baking soda all over each soiled carpet.
2. Let it set a while.
3. Vacuum it up.
Use the suggestions I posted earlier regarding creating air fresheners - mug of vanilla in a warm oven, or orange peels in a pot of simmering water on the stove.
Your house won't be perfect by Thursday. Just make it safe. Anybody with any sense will know that a house with 4 year old twins and a baby is going to appear hectic and lived in.
If the social worker makes any remarks about the way it looks, tell her that because you have your hands full, you try to concentrate on the 3 D's - Dinner, Dishes, and Duds. That makes it sound as if you at least have a basic plan in place. At this site, that's what we recommend for people in your circumstances. If you can manage those on a day-to-day basis, you will survive until the children are older and things will get better in certain areas.
Good luck! We are cheering you on every step of the way!
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kylakevin
New Member
Joined: May 2013
Posts: 62
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Post by kylakevin on May 29, 2013 6:08:42 GMT -5
One of my "dirty secrets" is I use my car , back seat and trunk, to hide bags of stuff I don't want others to see. Like bags of laundry, picked up miscellaneous papers that I need to sort through but just don't have the time. On the day CPS is coming, move the car and park it away from your house. Good luck! I've never been involved with CPS but I believe they are looking for dangerous situations, not the overall neatness of a home. Make sure all obvious garbage is gone. CPS does require each child to have a clean bed, and a functioning bathroom in the home. Make sure that the house doesn't smell. Open the windows for even 5 or 15 minutes is enough! Good luck and know a lot of fingers are being crossed for you, plus a lot of prayers! Good Idea i think, Anonsally! have a look at this idea. |
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Blackswan
Banned
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 6,388
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Post by Blackswan on May 29, 2013 10:25:45 GMT -5
For future reference, after the Cps junk is over and you have time to think about something else:
People don't ever do anything without a reason. All of my behavior classes from when I got my teacher education (California state university Los Angeles 2007) taught me that all behaviors have some sort of purpose/ "reward". Usually though the person doing the behavior and those around them are not consciously aware of the purpose of the behavior.
As far as the peeing on the floor goes, my first best guess is that it is for attention and your reaction when you see what has happened. With three little ones in a household, even making a big negative or dismayed reaction from mom is a HUGE reward.
One thing to try and see if it helps extinguish the behavior is try to have ZERO reaction to the mess other than handing the child some safe cleaning supplies to clean up their own mess (a four year old can easily clean their own urine off of a wooden floor) and sending the child to their room, on their own,'to change their underwear and put the dirties in the dirty clothes.
You can have them clean their body up with a baby wipe first if any of the urine gets on them. No baths, too rewarding.
You can supervise all this but do it nonchalantly and spend plenty of time being preoccupied with something else and barely watching.
Then, for all the kids, later on, catch them being good and heap on all kinds of praise for that.
Also BEFORE the child pees on the floor, say even an hour or two after they wake up before they even have a chance, give them big praise for not peeing on the floor and for peeing in the potty when you see that.
Kids love positive attention so they will repeat repeat repeat anything that makes you happy.
I'm sure you are a great mom, but with the rush of the day with all those kids, it can be hard to do something that's a little bit unusual like praising through out the day. That's a teacher tactic, not a natural mom tactic, and has to be learned, but once you get used to it, it will be second nature and you will have those kids acting like little angels. I hope that helps.
Don't worry about it til at least Friday though! You have too much on your plate right now to do any major changes.
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Post by CaringFriend on May 30, 2013 18:06:20 GMT -5
Anonsally, it's 7 PM Thursday here and I have been thinking of you all day. I hope things went well for you. If you have time, please let us know how it went. If you do not wish to do that, at least please come back sometime soon and let us support you through getting things under control. You will not be judged, but helped with care and compassion.
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