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Post by overwhelmedmama on Jan 23, 2017 12:03:00 GMT -5
Thanks! Yeah we will have to work on the teens. We used to try to pay them for chores, but we had to check and double check everything because we found they were not doing what they were supposed to. They are a little more reliable with babysitting for short periods of time, but we don't always pay them for that unless we will be out shopping or something. I do expect them to keep their rooms clean but that is hit or miss right now.
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Post by megsb on Jan 24, 2017 8:02:32 GMT -5
overwhelmedmama Just saying hi and want to encourage you, as I totally understand that 'overwhelmed' feeling. I think (believe) many or most of us here understand that awful feeling. Your feeling of discouragement might or probably will get better, as you make little bits of progress. Just doing one little thing and acknowledging it to yourself can help in this area. Just admitting your problem is a big step for you! You are in the right place for advice and support! Focusing on 'Progress Not Perfection' has helped me. Good luck!
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Post by overwhelmedmama on Jan 24, 2017 9:41:40 GMT -5
Thanks for the support! Yes I think I will start feeling less discouraged as I get more done. I think the big thing in the way of my progress right now, is that my youngest doesn't sleep through the night yet and wakes up way too early. This leaves me tired and having zero time to myself. So I know I need to be patient and eventually I will have more time to work on the house.
I love the saying "Progress Not Perfection" too!
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Post by def6 on Jan 26, 2017 18:24:28 GMT -5
I feel for you overwhelmedmama... I've been in your shoes. You need some time to yourself. I hope you can get some relief.
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Post by overwhelmedmama on Jan 27, 2017 11:30:51 GMT -5
Thank you! I would LOVE to have some time to myself. I'm just trying to be patient. I remember things getting much easier when my older son was about 4.
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Post by creativechaos on Mar 5, 2017 19:42:41 GMT -5
how are you doing, overwhelmedmama? i hope you are keeping your head above water and getting a bit of stolen moments to yourself. hang in there - your situation sounds hard but not impossible, with your so helping and the boys doing their own laundry. i really like the idea of paying the boys for some simple chores and babysitting. wishing you the very best!
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Post by overwhelmedmama on Mar 6, 2017 11:53:53 GMT -5
Thanks for checking in with me creativechaos. I don't actually have any time for myself, but I am hopeful that I will one day soon. My weekends have been crazy. My house is loud and chaotic and I sometimes get depressed and stay on the couch a lot. The boys are not always cooperative. They are helpful sometimes though. You are right about it not being impossible. I try to remember that they get older and it gets easier. But I don't want to rush things along without enjoying the babies being little.
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H2H
Banned
halfwaytohoarder gets rid of it all!
Joined: February 2017
Posts: 2,041
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Post by H2H on Mar 6, 2017 13:19:17 GMT -5
OVERWHELMED MAMA you are wise to focus on the time the babies are small, create those memories, and not worry over minutae that will go on daily anyway ... I have learned that if I imagine 5 years from now, 10, and look back that I will have forgotten the other details of life and recall the sweetest events, or silly things.
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Post by overwhelmedmama on Mar 6, 2017 14:19:39 GMT -5
You are right h2h. Things can be very different in five years time, especially with kids. Five years ago in 2012, I had one son, 8 years old, going through a difficult time with my first husband, and was living in a different house. Five years from now, all three boys will be adults (although maybe still living with us) and the babies will be 8 and 6 years old!
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H2H
Banned
halfwaytohoarder gets rid of it all!
Joined: February 2017
Posts: 2,041
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Post by H2H on Mar 6, 2017 15:18:39 GMT -5
Hi again, I don't have children, just played 'auntie' over the years....
and you know that saying "Nobody ever said on their deathbed they 'wished they spent more time in the office' Right?
Last year when my elderly dog was failing ..getting more stubborn on walks, wearing me down I tried to stop and tell myself that I would not have this opportunity to walk her, with patience, very soon..and of course I regret I was not kinder than I was.
as for 'role modeling'... all the boys will remember mom laughing and tickling the babies, and spending time on the important things... THEM.. no one ever cares if socks are piled on the bed!!
you rock!
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Post by overwhelmedmama on Mar 7, 2017 9:42:39 GMT -5
Yeah it is hard when pets get older and we know there is not much time left with them. In 2013, my 17yo cat and 15yo dog both died the same year. So hard to watch them getting frail and weaker.
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