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Post by sickandtired on Oct 24, 2017 14:21:27 GMT -5
today I think is the day to change my life but it is so overwhelming to even start. While I have a smallish home, I am at a hard level 3 in all rooms. I started to gather some bags of trash but it seems never ending and right down hopeless. I have 24 days to get a large living room, kitchen, two bedrooms and a bathroom clean to par. It is not a self imposed time frame but my sister is coming home from the nursing home 3 months early (good news for her health beating all goals, bad news with this house to do). She lived in squalor with me for years, it’s her mess as well. However she was diagnosed with colon cancer a year ago last August and two weeks before Easter she went to the hospital because of chemo knocking her down so hard, in the hospital she was contracted superbug phenomena in both lungs and a blood infection and spent the next 6 weeks in the hospital. Where her kidneys shut down. Anyways she was sent to recover and have physical therapy while adjusting to dialysis. She wasn’t due to come home until after the first of the year some time, however her kidneys started filtering properly enough she can come off dialysis and this be sent home. She can not come home to this house, we don’t even have hot water because gas hit shut off and it’s too dirty to even consider letting a gasman in, they would condemn this house in an instant. It isn’t piled high, it’s just trash. And everything smells like urine from the dogs and I just feel hopeless. I am so happy I found y’all.
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Post by mynicehome on Oct 24, 2017 15:22:43 GMT -5
Welcome to the forum sickandtired . How wonderful to have your sister back home again soon! Wow, she's been through a lot! I'm sure she will appreciate your effort to make home a healing and recuperative place to return to.
Don't worry about the smells right now, focus on the trash. Much of the smell will go out with the garbage and you'll then have the space to do some deeper cleaning.
Removing all the trash from your house is overwhelming but removing one bag at time, of whatever size, is not. Focus on just that one bagful and get it out of the house if you can until trash day. Find out how many bags are allowed for pick up and use the limit to the max. Don't worry about what neighbours, trashmen or anyone will think. Who cares! Really! If you go out of the house routinely with the car or on walks, bring a small bag of trash with you and unload it when you get gas. If walking, slip the bag into a reusable shopping totebag and drop into any convenient trashcan. If you have a willing neighbour, max out their limit too. If you have actual trash cans, bring them in and put into whatever room you are working in. Line as many smaller trash pails, or buckets, or small boxes as you can find and put them just everywhere for easy access. Don't worry about recycling anything if that's what you think you should do...it is not! At least not right now.
Focus on the rooms you will need the most to eventually get the gas man in, and the rooms your sister, and yourself, will need for comfortable living. Kitchen, bedroom, bathroom...prioritize. You've got 24 days...after filling a few bags guesstimate how many bags per day to aim for.
You can do this SaT! Congratulate yourself with every piece of trash that you get rid of. Put on some music and make it an exercise of sorts if that helps.
So happy you are here with us, and that you and sis will soon be together again!
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Post by hedy on Oct 24, 2017 17:03:40 GMT -5
Have a welcome hug. You absolutely CAN do this. Having said that, and considering your specific situation (sister), why not call one of those companies that specialise in cleaning "hoarder" mess? They are used to FAR worse conditions than yours, so you can breathe easily when you open your door to them, and it will be all over much quicker. I don't know how much they charge but I am willing to bet it would be one of the best investments of your life. You can then start aftesh. Good luck!
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Post by def6 on Oct 24, 2017 22:29:11 GMT -5
That is a lot of good news about your sister"s health sickandtired But the bad news is you have to hurry and get it done now. You can do it.
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Post by creativechaos on Oct 24, 2017 22:45:59 GMT -5
hello, sickandtired - and welcome! i'm so glad you found us too. People here will help and cheer and keep you going. What you have to do is daunting - I wish you ease in getting the trash out so you can clean up for your dSister. if you can be on this site, there are many good work threads and all you have to do is just pick up one piece of trash at a time and get it bagged up - that will make a tremendous difference visually and emotionally to just get the trash out. Prayers, hugs, and cheers for you. You are worth it - both having a clean house free of trash, and quality time with your sister. you may need some assistance - that sounds like an awful lot to do alone in such a short time frame. Hoping that solutions and help will come easily.
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Post by Nael_C on Oct 25, 2017 0:17:59 GMT -5
Hello there! Welcome to the forum! You will find comfort here, there are many of us who struggled and found a way to cope through discussions, thoughts, new ideas, learning methods, making lists, or just plain, amazing hugs! I understand how overwhelming it seems now. But, believe me, we all felt this way at one point or another. And some days we still do. On the other hand, we have learnt to manage. Not be perfect, but to manage things, to get things done. So, maybe it will help to stop looking at the WHOLE of the house. Start looking AT ONE SPOT at this time. So, can you imagine a hula hoop over this spot? Or just make your hands into a big circle. Now you have your spot! Now, clean just this one spot for now. Get all the trash that is in that one spot. Then have a cup of coffee. "WAAAT? Coffeeee? Didn't I just tell you that I have a house full of trash?" you may think or say. Yes, you did. But you need to not burn out. You need to do one thing at a time and then step back from it. Have a break, breathe. Then get your hands in a circle together again, your mind's hula hoop and toss everything from this spot. There is only one thing you have to take care of. Defend the clean spots. Tell everyone, nothing gets into those clean spaces again. Nothing is tossed, nothing is thrown on them, not a sock, not a bag, not a paper. This way you will start having little spots of tidyness in every room. And many of these little spots can make a HUGE difference. For now, many hugs, sending warmth and light your way! You can do it! We can do it, lets' go for it!
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Post by notanotherdecade on Oct 25, 2017 2:28:45 GMT -5
Hello sickandtired welcome Wow 24 days...., it can seem scary and almost impossible , starting major projects can feel overwhelming, esp after the anxious year you and your sister have had. With your sisters immune system being lower than average I'm guessing your emphasis is on getting rid and on sanitising the grotty stuff, there may be some items you are reluctant to throw away, but if they are not able to be cleaned then you are going to have to tap into a ruthless streak and get them out of there.... I'm not sure if the dogs have the freedom of the house at the moment, it may seem hard hearted to limit their movements, esp if they have been your friends and companions for years,, but if they are weeing in the rooms , the dogs may need more garden-time, and keeping out of bedrooms, do they have an outdoors shelter?.. Glad you have found the group, lots of friendly people here to cheer you on, you will do this, don't demand of yourself that the house will be perfect for December, accept that there will be more work to do in clearing and cleaning into next year, so do pace yourself, and remember your sister will be ready and able to do some every day tasks such as cooking, washing up, etc,
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Post by joyinvirginia on Oct 25, 2017 15:27:21 GMT -5
Welcome! You can do this! Focus on having a safe entryway and a clean room she can sleep in. Practice amnesty for yourself, you don't have to recycle things, just fill up trash bags with everything cluttering up those areas. Do you have belly bands the dogs could wear? Keep us posted on your progress.
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Post by PerrinJade on Oct 26, 2017 21:44:25 GMT -5
I'm so happy your sister is doing so much better and will be home soon. I know how terrifying it can be to be faced with a quick deadline for an overwhelming mess, especially if you have other responsibilities or health issues (or both!). I hope you'll find your way to the many different threads to help you get going. There are so many to choose from. Personally, when I have an overwhelming amount of tasks that are roughly equal priority, I like to use the Dice Game. It can be found in the Squalor Board section. There are dice rollers online if you don't have dice. random.org is one a lot of people use. There's also a roll command in our chat room. Just type /roll n (n = number of items on your list). Best of luck to you, sickandtired. If you need an ear (or eye since it's text-based ), I'm around most days right now (I have spurts of decreased presence sometimes). I'm so glad you're here!
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