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Post by mouse on Dec 17, 2017 4:40:54 GMT -5
Hi all! I was a really active member here about, oh, nine or ten years ago. Then I gradually got things a little in order, and life got busy, and I stopped posting. The squalor problem never entirely went away. It went into a sort of remission for a while. I moved, I started making a bit more money, and used that money to hire a cleaning service to come first twice, then four times a month. I still had a bit of clutter, but it never went past Level 1, which was perfectly acceptable as far as I was concerned. I bought a house, briefly backslid into squalor, but got it under control again before it got too bad, and then I got into a long-term relationship with someone who was really into cleaning, so it was easy to stay motivated with her around. Unfortunately, the cleaning turned out to be one of the few good things about the relationship (she became verbally and psychologically abusive), and it came to an end. I sold the house and moved to a new city for my job, and ended up back as a renter. I struggled with clutter again, and with keeping the cats' litter boxes regularly scooped, but it still felt as though things were (mostly) under control. Sure, the house would get messy, but it was nothing a few hours of elbow grease couldn't fix whenever the need arose. Then, after a conflict with my landlady (she threatened to evict me two weeks after insisting I sign a new lease and calling me her "best tenant"), I decided to move out. I gave her notice, and suddenly found myself in a time crunch to get my stuff packed and out. It's been ever since then that things have spiraled out of my control again. When I moved, I didn't do any kind of sorting or purging, just packed everything into boxes and went. I also have several pets: four cats and a dog, and the move stressed them out incredibly. My elderly dog, ever since I moved, has been having accidents in the house, often multiple times a day. I've managed to keep on top of those, but during that time I always imagined I could smell cat pee in the house. I couldn't figure it out. I'm not super meticulous about the litter boxes, but the cats have always used them without issue. Last week I finally figured out that at least one of the cats was stress-peeing under a couple of the boxes I'd left in the basement (still packed, alas), and it had soaked deeply into the carpet. The smell is no longer a mystery, but now I am looking at a serious problem of carpet and under-padding being potentially ruined (I've had professional carpet cleaners come in, but unfortunately whatever they did didn't work). I've been completely overwhelmed ever since I moved. I haven't unpacked half my stuff, every single room in my house is in disarray, and I've come to the conclusion that I a) have way too much stuff for one person, and b) need to downsize (both my stuff and my living space) in order for things to become manageable for me again. My office is moving in a couple of years, and when that happens I'd like to move house again, to somewhere much smaller, where I won't have to worry about keeping a huge space organized and clean, but just the idea of going through all my stuff fills me with dread. At a friend's suggestion, I also went very recently to my doctor for a referral to look into getting tested for ADHD. Having done a bit of research, it really does seem as though I have some pretty serious impairment in executive functioning (that's fodder for another post, but ADHD would explain so much about the problems I've had most of my life). Unfortunately I won't know for sure for quite some time. I did make an appointment with an ADHD coach to get the ball rolling no matter what the outcome of the assessment, but my first appointment isn't until the end of January, so I have a ways to go in the meantime. Anyway, as I was quietly despairing over things this weekend, I remembered how wonderful and supportive everyone on this board was, back in the day, and I figured that my best bet was to come back, see how the community was doing, and create some accountability for myself. There's no magic fix, but I'm hoping that the combination of (maybe) medication, therapy/coaching, and keeping myself accountable here will get me to where I need to go. tl;dr: I am back after being gone several years. My house is a disaster, and I want to downsize. I might have ADHD. The end.
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Post by hollyhock on Dec 17, 2017 7:22:53 GMT -5
Welcome back mouse. So glad that you remembered this group - it is invaluable. There are several work along groups that might be new to you, and 1 for weekly challenges where you set yourself a goal for the week, that might be helpful as you wait for your appointments. Hoping to see more of you.
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Post by sillycanuck on Dec 17, 2017 8:22:53 GMT -5
welcome home
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I'm back!
Dec 17, 2017 13:28:09 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by joyinvirginia on Dec 17, 2017 13:28:09 GMT -5
Hi mouse! I do remember you, there are quite a few of us long time posters around! Glad you are back! Decide what will give you the biggest return on time invested to clean our sort now. Is it the entry way or the kitchen counter or something else? Focus on one spot for now. I'm assuming the cat urine issue is the most important thing bothering you now. I've had success in the past doing a full soaking of vinegar and water mix, repeating daily over several days, and using nature's miracle also, alternating. Things with cat urine that I can put in the washer, I use Borax - you can find "20 mule team" brand borax in the detergent section in many grocery stores.
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Post by Nael_C on Dec 18, 2017 11:57:47 GMT -5
Hello! It is a good decision and I wish you to downsize and achieve your housekeepin'goals. You are right on the support and the ideas that the kind people of this forum provide, especially when in time of need. They are valuable indeed!
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Post by creativechaos on Dec 20, 2017 18:20:12 GMT -5
hi mouse! i remember you!welcome back to the fold! adhd really is a bear; i struggle with it too. there is a good website/blog and i get their newsletter (ADDitude) -it helps me when i am reduced to rubble and self recrimination. there are many good articles and tips (ignore all the things they try to sell you.) you learn to grab onto those times of clear focus and be grateful for those. you've had a lot of stressors in your life; i hope this is the beginning again of the road to peace for you and your beloved furbabies. luv, cc
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Post by mouse on Dec 22, 2017 12:40:34 GMT -5
I came here with very good intentions, and immediately got overwhelmed by life again and wasn't able to come back to post right away.
Thank you all for the warm welcome back!
~Mouse
(There used to be a mouse emoji. Where did it go?)
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Post by casper on Dec 22, 2017 12:51:44 GMT -5
Photobucket is holding all our cute emojis hostage and demanding a huge ransom.
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Dec 23, 2017 9:50:18 GMT -5
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Post by RoadRunner on Dec 23, 2017 15:32:11 GMT -5
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Post by Diane on Dec 23, 2017 20:27:41 GMT -5
Hi mouse, I remember you. I've been gone for awhile too. I've plugged away at the clutter inconsistently, but like you, I want to get more intentional again. I'm happy you're back.
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OKim
New Member
Joined: November 2017
Posts: 8
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Post by OKim on Dec 23, 2017 20:45:01 GMT -5
Hey Mouse,
I've recently returned to the fold myself and I remember you from when I was here before! I, however, forgot my old log-in info and screen name, so I've had to start over anew with new name. Oh well.
Nice to see another familiar face. Sorry mine isn't familiar now.
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Post by Little_Ninja on Dec 26, 2017 16:53:21 GMT -5
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Post by def6 on Dec 26, 2017 18:43:13 GMT -5
So glad to have you back mouse. I think I could use an ADHD coach...I look forward to hearing about that.
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Post by mouse on Dec 26, 2017 18:53:20 GMT -5
def6 I will definitely keep people posted, but I won't be seeing this new lady until the end of January. ~Mouse
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