|
Post by AmethystsJunkPile on Feb 15, 2018 21:49:02 GMT -5
Hello. I'm the legal carer for both of my (disabled) parents, and I feel like I haven't been doing my job well enough, because we live in a mess.
The mess started before the carer thing did. By the time helping out around here became my job outright, the mess was out of control. Some rooms, such as our bedrooms, the living room, and the kitchen are functional. Sure, there are messy spots, such as the area around the TV, which is a frightening tangle of wires, power strips and a few cardboard boxes. But we have the basic necessities. However, there are some rooms that are complete chaos, and are barely used as a result. For instance, the office is so full of stuff that there's hardly anywhere to walk, so we generally only go in there to print out shopping lists or deal with whatever items we left in there (for instance, to get a book to read, since some of our books are in there). I swear that half of our mess is garbage and the other half is items that ended up in strange places because the places they should be aren't usable. Those times when I do manage to clean sometimes involve discoveries like "oh yeah, we have a coffee table in here... and here it is" and "ew, a dead mouse."
|
|
|
Hi
Feb 16, 2018 0:53:41 GMT -5
via mobile
Post by joyinvirginia on Feb 16, 2018 0:53:41 GMT -5
Welcome! You have some functional rooms, that's great! Look around and decide what you want to focus on. You will get great ideas and encouragement!
|
|
|
Hi
Feb 16, 2018 1:48:13 GMT -5
Post by jendela on Feb 16, 2018 1:48:13 GMT -5
Hi and welcome AmethystsJunkPile - it can be a hard and lonely job being a carer. It is great that you have a functional kitchen, not to mention the other rooms. Can you expand the functional out to include some of those other areas that are less functional? Good luck.
|
|
|
Hi
Feb 16, 2018 2:09:50 GMT -5
Post by creativechaos on Feb 16, 2018 2:09:50 GMT -5
Welcome, @amethystsjunkpile! ah, i know the syndrome well on the hidden furniture!
you have a lot on your plate; it can seem overwhelming but you haven't lost your sense of humor! you're in the right place - there are a lot of place to plug in if you want company; listzilla threads, chat, your own blog, or just lurk, read, and work. one of my personal favorites is the BDG method because i tend to be layzee and distractible. there's a thread expianing it - one of the things is tn pick up something every time you go to another room and put it away. or at least closer to where it would go if there were room to put it away. there are a lot of great and inspiring threads in the squalor area and in the favorites area.
maybe having a plan or list for what goes where, and uses of each room, would help, and give you somewhere to aim. wishing you the very best in your adventure as carer; don't forget to include yourself in the care!
|
|
|
Hi
Feb 16, 2018 7:21:39 GMT -5
Post by AmethystsJunkPile on Feb 16, 2018 7:21:39 GMT -5
Hi and welcome AmethystsJunkPile - it can be a hard and lonely job being a carer. It is great that you have a functional kitchen, not to mention the other rooms. Can you expand the functional out to include some of those other areas that are less functional? Good luck. It is indeed hard and lonely, but it's less lonely when the people who you're caring for are people who you like living with anyway. My parents are cool people. We get along pretty well and have a lot of the same interests. Making the rest of the house more functional is my goal here. I'm doing my best, but it's like an odd sort of puzzle where in order to clean a space that has inappropriately-placed items in it, I need to clean another space as well so that I have somewhere else to put them. And since my parents have chemical sensitivity issues, there are a number of things that need multiple designated locations - one in the part of the house where we let new things air out because they still smell like the store/the cleaning chemicals used in the store/the perfume worn by the people shopping in the store/etc, and one in the other part of the house for when these things have aired out and aren't a problem. And in far too many cases, we only know where things are going to go once they've aired out - which is a problem I need to find a solution for. As it is, the part of the house where we leave things while they air out is chaos, while the main living area is mostly alright. Living with an unusual mix of problems can be... difficult.
|
|
|
Post by emeraldine on Feb 18, 2018 20:44:01 GMT -5
Hi Amethyst, and welcome. I understand what you are going through. My dad, aged 88, has dementia, and my brother and I mix our own in-home care with some respite care from a local nursing home. I suggest you take the clean-out slowly and thoughtfully. Don't rush. You will get through it, at a pace that suits you. It might seem long and laborious now, but keep plugging away and you will do it. It took a long time for your parents' house to get in its present state, so expect it to take a while to get free of clutter, I spent a whole day getting my dad's walk-in kitchen cupboard clean, tidy and purged of ancient rubbish. But ***, it felt good. Our parents can no longer do this for themselves, so we must do it for them.
|
|