sheep
New Member
Joined: October 2012
Posts: 34
|
Post by sheep on Oct 24, 2012 5:35:23 GMT -5
Hi, everyone.  I have been watching the A&E program "Hoarders" recently and having seen a few episodes, I wondered if they ever spotlight a wealthy or organized hoarder? And is there such a thing? The reason I ask is I have a dear relative that I am pretty sure is a hoarder. I have seen her go through several phases and interests over the years and her collections are always massive and way over the top, but she keeps things organized, almost to the point of perfection. Her personality is what I would call a perfectionist. She has a low tolerance for people who are "***" and "sloppy." I just wonder if any of you have ever heard of such a thing. Or are hoarders, by definition, always living in squalor? Sheep |
|
|
|
Post by Ally on Oct 24, 2012 5:49:11 GMT -5
There are absolutely organized hoarders.
I'd think they would have some degree of OCD.
My daughter has a friend who's parents (from what I understand, I haven't seen it) have a large area of the basement filled with shelving.
They buy things on sale with coupons, getting super deals, and then have stuff stored in an organized fashion on these shelves.
Like I say, I haven't seen it but from what I understand they might have 10 or 20 bottles of shampoo, several containers of laundry detergent, and lots of non-perishable goods, etc.
|
|
|
|
Post by Script on Oct 24, 2012 6:50:54 GMT -5
note: details changed to protect innocent.
I have a "friend" who married into a family of hoarders. Let's call them The Klutterers. Wealthy and solid church-going-citizens.
*Auntie Bee was reduced to sleeping on the couch as her bed was covered with things. When she died, the friends who helped with the clean-out found incredible amounts of money, unworn clothes, and shop-and-drop treasures.
*At one point Cousin Laura moved from a small rental duplex into a 6000 square foot family mansion: and had it INSTANTLY filled with her possessions that were "in storage" somewhere.
*Cousin Edwin [bi-coastal lawyer] has two homes, each about 6000 square feet, in different cities. Not exactly full, but certainly packed. His ex-wife filled multiple disposal bins of his stuff before the separation. Some were boxes that had not been opened through two moves [over 18 years?]. During the marriage she kept his "collecting" under control, but on his own Edwin has really gone to town on e-bay and other 'stores'. Stamps. Coins. Crystal. Antiques. China. High ticket stuff.
The K family are not going to garage sales or thrift stores. They like Macy's and Saks and Nordstroms etc. They travel a lot. They buy souvenirs. They take thousands of photos on their trips. They have really nice stuff. BUT....
If they had to live in "normal" size homes, their possessions would fill every square inch. They have regular cleaning ladies, so there is not much squalor. But they are very controlling of their possessions. Edwin has wasted incredible amounts of $$$ through poor business management, demand resistance, procrastination, perfectionism. Example: he "hoards" his money too and won't pay his credit card bills on time, thus he runs up HUGE interest payments. He doesn't care.
His ex-wife felt that his hoarding and general indifference to HOME ORDER were factors in the marriage breakup.
|
|
|
|
Post by midlife on Oct 24, 2012 7:27:00 GMT -5
Yeah, I think that wealthy hoarders simply have the resources to mitigate the damage done by their hoarding -- like in Script's example, they can easily pay the cleaning lady, or pay the late fees, or buy infinite shelving units with matching storage totes. And if they decide they need to change their lives, they also have the resources to hire professional help, so they have much less motivation to air their problems on national TV.
|
|
|
|
Post by Ally on Oct 24, 2012 7:53:51 GMT -5
Charis posted photos of a house, owned at one time by wealthy hoarders/collectors, in England.
I think you have to define hoarder.
If you read the dictionary definition:
Then there are compulsive hoarders (or pathological collectors) who practice a "pattern of behavior that is characterized by the excessive acquisition of and inability or unwillingness to discard large quantities of objects that would seemingly qualify as useless or without value."
|
|
|
|
Post by Di on Oct 24, 2012 7:57:54 GMT -5
I know quite a few wealthy hoarders. Because they have the money, the hoarding isn't truly a problem, but it's ridiculous. I have seen someone keep children's wooden puzzles with missing pieces carefully stored. One person I know has every T-shirt that she has gotten since high school, Massive pieces of antique storage furniture can hold a multitude of unneeded items and still look good from the outside.
|
|
|
|
Post by ramatama on Oct 24, 2012 8:19:11 GMT -5
perhaps some would say I am now a "tidy hoarder...  There is the doom room and I have lots of JUSTIN CASE stuff in containers, boxes and in closets. I have a vast collection that has taken over the entire apartment and our living room is the "museum".  I have several bags and boxes of things we inherited and are "sort of" in the way (under a table, on high shelves, in a closet or two, under some beds) until we decide what to do with it all, and our attic allotment is packed with postponed decisions too. So with everyday messes we hover at level 0.5 to 1.5 despite all our stuff. I have been told by relatives and close friends that our place looks "crowded, but clean" C'est la vie chez nous |
|
|
|
Post by Ally on Oct 24, 2012 8:43:54 GMT -5
Actually my parent's house always looked a little cluttered, but was always clean. After the 4 kids grew up and moved out, they put a small addition on, mostly increasing the size of 2 rooms. One of those rooms had been my bedroom as a child, and it doubled in size. Mom wanted Dad to add a bathroom so it could be a guest room, He never did. It was neat at first, but over the past 20 years it has become a room completely filled with stuff. Unfortunatly as mom's health has declined her paper hoard has started taking over part of the living room. She has boxes of mail, catalogs, magazines. She will sit all day and sort through the papers, but very little ends up being removed. Most is just shuffled from one box or one pile to another. Dad attempts to throw stuff away when she isn't paying attention, but it's slow going and the hoard is increasing over time. It doesn't help that she also buys things from these catalogs. Which also clutters up the place. Dad says there are boxes of things coming all the time. He is frustrated, but as they are now in their 80's, I don't see any change coming...
|
|
|
|
Post by def6 on Oct 24, 2012 8:56:30 GMT -5
Yes! There's one in particular on this board. I'll let them identify themselves if they want to. Anyway, This person buys every color of an item( like a particular shirt) and puts them (color coded ) in see through bins. Then the bins get stacked up. I've often wondered if the reason for this person's "collecting" was to see all of the beautiful colors -like a rainbow or maybe to feel the soft texture of the fabric or to smell the perfume of the fabric softner for that many items of clothing. All of these things could be addictive to have around , in my opinion. Just some ideas...
|
|
|
|
Post by eagle on Oct 24, 2012 9:44:15 GMT -5
There have been lots of famous, infamous, wealthy and not-so-wealthy hoarders throughout history. Some don't have not been labeled as such, but are obviously collectors of large quantities of things. In some cases they are simply 'eccentric', but it seems that the tendency is or was there, and maybe it isn't called 'hoarding' because of who they are, rather than what they do.
How many shoes did Imelda Marcos need? (Apparently 2700 pair.)
How many cars did Elvis Presley need? (I've been to Graceland, and the ones on display are only a small portion of his collection.)
How many $100.00 bills did Jackie Gleason need? (He actually kept large quantities of cash all over his home, in various pockets of his clothing because of his fear of returning to the poverty of his youth.)
And might I add, there are surely tons of wealthy people hoarding cash in the Cayman Islands banks. It seems to me that they also fall into the category of wealthy hoarders. We just don't get to know about very many of them because they hide their money so well. (Until someone starts investigating for one reason or another.)
There was a Bouvier (relative to Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy Onassis) who was an animal hoarder. (Of the Grey Gardens fame.)
I've heard speculation that other modern day Hollywood types are hoarders, but won't list their names in case it's not true. Still why wouldn't a famous actor be a hoarder, too. Don't we all have a tendency to keep all manner of memorabilia from our accomplishments? If we can do it, so can someone who is famous, wealthy or what-have-you.
As far as do I know them? Well, not personally, no. (Not the ones I mentioned above.) But I have seen many a museum of stuff and have visited the homes of friends all my life. I've even had wealthy friends. And yes, there are a few in my acquaintance who 'collected' beyond reason, to the point that they could be termed hoarders. Some were tidy; some were not.
|
|
|
|
Post by sleepymom on Oct 24, 2012 9:59:44 GMT -5
One of my grandmas, while definitely not wealthy, was very tidy hoarder. There was never anything out of place in her home, and she was fairly nit-picky about things like doing the dishes right after each meal, having beds made (properly!), and keeping things very clean & tidy. HOWEVER, they had several outbuildings (sheds), and her husband spent quite a bit of his time adding built-in cupboards in every room (the house started out with NO closets) and even added another room, with more built-in storage. All of this built-in storage, and every bit of furniture with drawers was packed to the gills with things that she`d saved, acquired, or that had been passed down from deceased family members. After her husband died, I got the job of helping her downsize & pack to move to a small retirement apt. That was one of my initial wake-up calls , that I`d come by my packrat instincts naturally. We didn`t get through everything, didn`t even touch the attic, but the house was going to her stepson, and at least some of the "stuff" was handed down from his dad and would have been supposed to go to him anyway. It was a big enough job as it was, so tried not to stress about it, but it still bugs my hoarder`s soul not to have picked through every last thing  |
|
|
|
Post by dayeanu on Oct 24, 2012 10:03:07 GMT -5
Yes! There's one in particular on this board. I'll let them identify themselves if they want to. Anyway, This person buys every color of an item( like a particular shirt) and puts them (color coded ) in see through bins. Then the bins get stacked up. I've often wondered if the reason for this person's "collecting" was to see all of the beautiful colors -like a rainbow or maybe to feel the soft texture of the fabric or to smell the perfume of the fabric softner for that many items of clothing. All of these things could be addictive to have around , in my opinion. Just some ideas... Well of course this person is not me - I'm not organized! BUT I DO have a compulsion to collect one of each color, or style, or . . . For me, it is described perfectly in "Buried in Treasures." Seeing tiny differences as significant, and even though each item is only slightly different, to people like me, the differences are vast and unique. Then, decision-making is agonizing - how to choose between these "unique and vastly different" items (that to the average person would look nearly identical.) For many items, for me, it is about completing sets. Having one of each color becomes a driving force. Completing sets of anything is a compulsion for me. It is anxiety-provoking and sometimes agonizing, to NOT complete a set, such as not having one of each color or design. This makes discarding stuff at my home very difficult, as well. |
|
|
|
Post by dayeanu on Oct 24, 2012 10:33:46 GMT -5
My mother and daddy are/were "well-to-do" hoarders. Mother is a neat hoarder and Daddy was a messy hoarder. They had plenty of room - 9 huge barns plus various out-buildings, a large Victorian two-story, and an old, large farm house. In later years, they purchased a third house and had it placed in an out-of-sight location further back on the farm.
Daddy collected every nut, bolt, piece of metal, string or wire he ever came across. He saved empty jars, oatmeal cans, paint cans and coffee cans to store the smaller items in. He also collected fine pedigreed cattle and horses, but since he had plenty of very fertile land, plenty of water, plenty of barns and equipment, and people who lived on the farm and worked here 7 days a week to take care of them, his herds were admired - and not considered "hoarding."
Mother "collected" antiques, furniture, light fixtures, rugs, figurines, crystal - which she displayed and/or stored, BUT she had plenty of houses in which to display it, and plenty of barns and buildings in which to store it. Plus, even though her "live-in" house is FULL, she has a knack for arranging things so they look nice. In one room, she has a large desk in front of a door, but it looks ok! I may post some pics to show what I mean.
Mother also hoards more mundane stuff - twist-ties, styrofoam to-go boxes, plastic shopping bags, magazines (she must have magazines back to 1950 - but again, she has a place to store them), she saves bits of used aluminum foil, used plastic wrap, bread sacks, bits of soap, bottles and jars, and recently, she started saving used paper napkins! She has tons of clothes that no longer fit, but she keeps them anyway. She can't throw away a burned-out appliance. The cabinets and storage buildings are full of coffee pots and toasters that "could be fixed."
Mother also had a cook, a housekeeper, and a laundress 6 days a week (and 7 when needed) for many, many years.
So we had no squalor, and no disorganized clutter.
|
|
|
|
Post by puppybox on Oct 24, 2012 11:06:47 GMT -5
There was a pretty wealthy hoarder on Oprah. She was not tidy at all. It wasn't a "wet" or gross hoard, there were no animals, bugs, grossness. but inevitably they found some mold and ick at the bottom when they dug out.
My mother is (actually "was" is more accurate, she has changed a lot since she had to go through all her mother's packratted things when she died, and a few other life events). And my mother is super tidy and clean. everything is packed up and neat and often dusted. It is organised, and there are lists of what is where in the attic. But there are a lot of things in boxes, that never get used becuase there is just too much. As I said, she has started giving it away (which makes the hoarder in me itch).
|
|
|
|
Post by ctrlz on Oct 24, 2012 13:23:10 GMT -5
Hi, everyone. I have been watching the A&E program "Hoarders" recently and having seen a few episodes, I wondered if they ever spotlight a wealthy or organized hoarder? And is there such a thing? The reason I ask is I have a dear relative that I am pretty sure is a hoarder. I have seen her go through several phases and interests over the years and her collections are always massive and way over the top, but she keeps things organized, almost to the point of perfection. Her personality is what I would call a perfectionist. She has a low tolerance for people who are "***" and "sloppy." I just wonder if any of you have ever heard of such a thing. Or are hoarders, by definition, always living in squalor? Sheep The Hoarders show is intended for shock value, so of course they pick the worst ones they can get. As for your relative, it is important to keep in mind that the most critical thing in mental health diagnoses is whether it negatively impacts your life. Everyone who has collections is not a hoarder, in the same way that everyone who gets sad is not depressed. Obviously you know your relative better than I do, but it's something to think about. |
|
