hopehope
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Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Dec 1, 2008 18:30:27 GMT -5
How do we free ourselves -- how do you free yourself -- mentally, from attachment, from wanting to hold on to the stuff?
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Post by fluffernut - now Jannie on Dec 1, 2008 19:41:41 GMT -5
I think of things I have thrown out and not missed. One December I was making embroidered bibs for infant nieces and nephews-my siblings gave me nine babies in four years. I hated those bibs, made one or two but it was slow going and getting too close to Christmas. I threw the bibs and embroidery floss in the trash and bought some cute handmade gifts at a craft show. I felt so free with those bibs in the garbage can! My Grandmother had a way. She had grown up in Germany in WW2, she had seen very hard times. She would throw the heels of bread to the birds in our backyard. She would kiss the bread good-bye, fling it and say "I hope I never wish I had this back."
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Post by dayeanu on Dec 1, 2008 21:37:38 GMT -5
Fluffernut, I love your grandmother's saying! As for how I free myself of stuff, I have two ways, so far. If something is truly trash, I can throw it away, no problem. Some things, like my grandson's outgrown clothes, I can discard easily, because I know it will bless someone else to have it. I can give it away and be happy. (learned that from Flylady.net) Where I run into problems is with stuff I can still use, or that I like. I love dishes, but I don't need 9 sets of china, esp. when my house is such a wreck that I can't have anyone over. That's where my problem lies.
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Post by brenda on Dec 1, 2008 22:01:28 GMT -5
You decide that living is more important than going down with the ship and it's cargo.
Brenda
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Post by zinnia on Dec 1, 2008 22:35:15 GMT -5
Answer of the Day : Keep the things that are right for you.
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Post by notsomessyshell on Dec 1, 2008 22:56:44 GMT -5
I love gramma's saying, too.
I have conversations with myself. Out loud sometimes. I ask is this thing good for me? Is it making my life better in any way? What will really happen if I get rid of it? Worst case scenario. It sometimes helps if I go really far with the worst case thing. As far as to be completely ridiculous and out of the realm of reality. It gets easier as I go through stuff. Sometimes I can get to just tossing stuff without the conversation.
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Post by moggyfan on Dec 1, 2008 23:03:54 GMT -5
The light, the space, the calm, the serenity, the freedom from fear.
The more I got rid of, the more I had.
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Blackswan
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Joined: October 2008
Posts: 6,388
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Post by Blackswan on Dec 2, 2008 1:00:00 GMT -5
For items that I give away, I picture a poor person being blessed by it.
When I get rid of my son's items (I have a harder time getting rid of his things behind his back than getting rid of my own) I say to myself, over and over, "I am giving him a squalor free life".
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Post by gottaproblem on Dec 2, 2008 11:25:54 GMT -5
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Post by dayeanu on Dec 2, 2008 14:42:54 GMT -5
I gave away some of my grandson's baby clothes to a local charity in our very small town. One bitterly cold day, I saw a young girl (who appeared to be very poor) with her little sick baby in the doctor's office, and her baby was wearing my grandson's snow suit! (I had kept that snowsuit for several years, just being sentimental. That day I was so very thankful I had given it away.) I remember that day whenever I want to keep things someone else might truly need.
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Post by Arid on Dec 2, 2008 15:18:55 GMT -5
You decide that living is more important than going down with the ship and it's cargo. Brenda OK; this is the first time that I ever have tried to do the "quote" thing; I hope that it works correctly! Anyway, I LOVE what Brenda said!!! I'm going to keep repeating this one to myself until it becomes automatic. Arid
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Post by puppybox on Dec 2, 2008 15:43:13 GMT -5
a few ways
1: box it up, live with it out of sight for a while, then eventually I can open it and get rid of about half the box.
2) with clothes- cut out a scrap (to make a quilt with, one day if I learn how to sew) and toss rest. if good, give to salvation army.
3) Show to dogs. Dance aroudn as if its something amazing, don't let them have it, then give it to them. They then rip and chew it to bits. Sweep up bits, toss.
I got rid of my old dolls this way. There were body parts on the floor for weeks. Sometimes they still find a head or leg under the furniture that they bring to me to play with.
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hopehope
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Dec 2, 2008 15:59:26 GMT -5
i like the dog part.
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Post by heylady1 on Dec 2, 2008 16:20:46 GMT -5
I love all these answers!! Puppybox, giving your stuff to your dogs is priceless!! It is difficult sometimes to let stuff go. I don't have a problem if the item is broken or in bad shape. Those things I can toss. When my son was young and growing, I had no problem taking his outgrown clothes and donating them. But like Dayeanu I have a problem when the item is in good condition and potentially useful to me and my family. I have been getting better about letting stuff go but it is still slow going and sometimes I agonize over each decision. In a deadline type situation I "think" I could make myself get past the agonizing part and just keep things that I actually need and use. Family heirlooms would have to be something that I at least like, but love would be better! For example, my grandmother left me a few hummels and 2 pieces of carnival glass. Out of these, I would want to keep the candy dish (carnival glass) if nothing else. The rest I could let go - I like them, but I absolutely love the candy dish!! Books were something I hoarded but were surprisingly the first things I let go! I used to be such an avid reader. But I think the internet kind of took over...anyway, it finally dawned on me that I hadn't read a book in years, that I had no desire to read, that I'd read all those books (some several times) and that it was pretty unlikely that I would ever read them again. So I gave them all away. I find too that sometimes just doing something on the spur of the moment will help me get past my mental block. And getting rid of one thing will inspire me to continue on.... This probably didn't help much but at least you know you're not alone in your problem!
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Post by puppybox on Dec 2, 2008 16:57:28 GMT -5
dayeanu, that is a great story. Don't we all jsut want our treasures to be appreciated by the perfect person. Well I guess sometimes they are!
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