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Post by ramatama on May 30, 2008 7:00:10 GMT -5
from another thread (catching yourself) i read written by WestsideStory: and began to think about how things might have to be put in a different perspective as one faces or lives in poverty. Yes, there must be a way to find a balance with what we save( hoard ) and what we actually intend to use/ know we will use. I am plagued by the stories i grew up with and it affects me to this day and is the reason for all my saving( hoarding ) for "just in case". Older relatives telling how they survived pre, during and post war by selling surpluses in the black market, how they traded things, even clothes for food. Then there is the matter of buying stuff while you can afford it because you don't know if maybe later on it will increase in price and then you can no longer. For me this is stuff that keeps long, that wont go bad and i know i will use in future. But i keep more than the average household needs. Oh there is so much more to be said about this and when i read that close to 40 % of all households in the USA are in or close to poverty, i begin to wonder, seriously, please do not berate me on this, if learning to save and do with what we have isn't a good thing after all? instead of chucking perfectly good stuff away, there must be a way to share it among those who cannot afford it... Yes, i see there is a dilemma: saving for worse times vs. sanity and trusting the future will provide. ...awaiting comments...  |
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Post by BDG on May 30, 2008 7:37:19 GMT -5
I personally think this economy we are dealing with right now is creating a lot hoarders for the very reason of fear. We see every night on the news, companies closing, people losing jobs and no relief in sight, so it is a scary situation.
I think that what one has to do is look at what one wishes to save versus how much space you have and then use organzing skills to where your life is not taken over by stuff. One has to have space to live, because if ones space is completely taken over by the things we are saving for a hard times then everyday is a struggle.
I also agree that this economy is affecting how we live, we are all having to cut corners on some things to keep the price of gas from overwhelming our budget. Hubby and me are putting out a garden for the first time in years and are planning on canning a lot of our food and also buying a small freezer and putting it on the back porch, it's cold here in late fall and winter of course, so it will not have to use that much energy and then turn it off in the early spring, when our freezer in the house will do.
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Post by rexroth on May 30, 2008 10:42:44 GMT -5
'I think that what one has to do is look at what one wishes to save versus how much space you have and then use organzing skills to where your life is not taken over by stuff.'
Wise words. That has been my experience.
Regards Rexroth
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Post by heylady1 on May 30, 2008 19:03:19 GMT -5
I know this is exactly why I keep certain things. Not food or paper products but things like the computer in the closet. It's an older model, that still works fairly good but the computer has a glitch which makes it impossible to upgrade the OS and because the OS is old, most of the stuff on the internet in no longer viewable on it. But in my mind I can't give it up because it does still work and if the computer I have now should die, I wouldn't be able to replace it..... I have alot of stuff for exactly this reason...  Things that might come in "handy" someday. And the worse part is that when I have given something away or sold it, by golly I will need it within a month. |
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Post by crazycatlady on May 30, 2008 22:06:44 GMT -5
I think we have to balance trying to give our excess to someone who can use it, and digging ourselves out of squalor. For the most part, I think it is wonderful to pass usable items on to someone who can use them!
But, and this is a big BUT! There is also something called amnesty. For those times when you cannot take the time to save the world, and must simply save yourself and your home. The times when a big dig out, and throwing things away is just fine. And later, once we are doing better, we can go back to donating.
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Post by reesa on May 31, 2008 0:06:52 GMT -5
I've been homeless. and after that I lived in a squatted house.
I have a lotof things that I don't consider hoarding. I know what really hard times look like and I know that they could always return. I live paycheck to paycheck and don't have the luxury of believing in the universe. Right now I have a toothache and no money for a dentist. I earn too much money for state aid. I'd say the universe falls down on the job pretty often to be honest and I would rather rely on myself.
That said, there are things I hoard. And I'm working on getting rid of all of it. But things that I will have to pay money for later- nope. Not getting rid of those. I know what it's like to go without and I don't trust the world to keep me solvent (or fix my sore, achy tooth)
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hollymaid
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Post by hollymaid on May 31, 2008 10:59:36 GMT -5
If you believe that the universe will provide everything you need. Than hanging on to stuff that is useless to you blocks the energy. You will not receive anything new. You are trying to create a feeling of abundance. Abundance is not stuff... Its having what you need when you need it.
Interesting theory. I have had less and had to make do with things that were old or worn out. I have had times in my life where things were good also, I was able to buy nice new things. I would like to find the balance.
Right now in my de-cluttering efforts I use the amnesty. I do not have the time to find someone to take my old stuff. I have went to second hand stores, they have a lot. so for now I am just tossing things out. However, I had this great baby stroller from the 70's in wonderful condition. I tried to donate it to the second hand store. they would not take it. I tossed it in the bin behind the store. Later I saw a young man and a pregnant lady retrieving it . The universe provided...
Reesa: Please phone around to the dentist sometimes you can find one who will let you pay in payments. I once was in this situation to. I borrowed some money from my mom to get my tooth fixed cause I could not stand it anymore. I mentioned that I had to borrow the money and the dentist gave me a discount if I could pay him cash.
I still had to pay the dentist~ I had to pay back my mother~ but, it cost less then it was suppose to.
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Post by neveropentheclosets on Jun 1, 2008 14:14:30 GMT -5
Ramatama - thanks for this thought-provoking thread. For me, I think the key is in what you said about "a way to find a balance." BDG and rexroth echoed this as well.
I do think we live in a tremendously materialistic and acquisitive society. I think that combined with easy credit has led a lot of people to live beyond their means and created a false sense of prosperity. I do think that if people were more comfortable with using what they had and living within their means people would be a lot better off. And sometimes that will mean buying in bulk, stocking up on things when they're on sale etc.
But, for me, part of my squalor issues are around a hoarder mentality - the desire to collect and to save. And I really run into trouble when all I do is "save" and never "use." That's where the balance thing comes in. It doesn't do any good if I buy plastic bags in bulk at Costco and then they sit in my car because I never bring them in the house, or they sit in the garage because there's so much stuff piled around them that I can't find them. In cases like those, I end up buying more at full price at the grocery store anyway.
Balance, organization, and living within your means - that seems like the magic recipe for me (just have to keep plugging away 'till I'm there...)
Reesa - another idea is to find a dental school. Treatments there by student dentists are usually free or very reduced. It's true the students are learning - but they only work under the observation of their professors so you have someone with a lot of experience directing. Just insist on a lot of novocaine! (This from my friend who's father is a dental professor.) But please don't wait - a toothache needs to be addressed. Prayers to you!
notc
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Post by threeg on Jun 1, 2008 14:31:19 GMT -5
I try to stock up on grocery sale items. (Without hoarding.) For instance, today I bought 3 bottles of salad dressing instead of one, as it was a lot cheaper on this sale. I will do this with most grocery items. I found a store that had soups 1/2 price, and bought 6 cans. Not an excessive amount, but a bit ahead.
Reesa, I can identify with your situation. I am working, but make a low pay and also do not have health insurance as yet. I am approved though, thank God, I just have to send in the payments and find a new doctor that accepts my insurance.
I hope that you can find relief for your toothache soon. There has got to be a dentist with a heart out there somewhere. So sorry that you're in pain. 3g is me
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rhall
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Post by rhall on Jun 1, 2008 15:56:49 GMT -5
Hollymaid, I don't believe the Universe will provide everything for me. I never believed that. I always attached "things" to specific people, jobs, money, trades, events. If you define something broadly enough, it's less and less meaningful as a way to make plans for the future or schedule your own priorities.
I have no steady job. I must sell things to get enough money to pay for my home, electricity, phone, food, medical care, all the rest. Some prices have gone up so much, it's a serious question if I can keep a car. I can't afford insurance on top of gasoline and higher food prices. I've started to change my food in response.
In my experience, it's not wise to leave things to the Universe. I've noticed how often those "things" only emerge in response to considerable work and planning on my part.
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Post by WestsideStory on Jun 1, 2008 18:23:12 GMT -5
Reesa --
I ditto what neveropentheclosets said about your tooth. Is there anyway you could have a dental school look at it? Don't know where you live, but here in my metropolitan area there are two dental schools, and one has evening hours. I've had dental work at a dental school in the past, when I was a student, and it was a lot cheaper than getting it done by someone who had to pay for overhead and pay for advertising and pay for all the fancy new machines, etc. in a private dental office. Plus, you're much less likely to have someone do a poor job. The students want to pass their classes, and they are under great supervision.
Even if you are not near a dental school, you might be near a junior college which trains dental hygenists. You can get teeth cleaning and dental hygiene care through them at a very reduced rate, and they may have a connection with a consulting dentist who might do dental work for their clients on a reduced or sliding scale. Worth checking out, at least.
Hope you get some relief soon -- an achy tooth is no fun!
WestsideStory
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hollymaid
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Post by hollymaid on Jun 2, 2008 15:13:07 GMT -5
Ramatama: I respect your opinion. I am sorry you are going through such a rough time.
I think what is meant by "to trust that the universe will provide what I need when I need it" Is that opportunities to make choices good or bad will present themselves.
It doesn't mean that it does not involve hard work or effort on your part.
You are in a tight spot now... but, you have thing to sell to get you past this. I am sure I am not explaining this right. sorry!
When we were kids my parents had no money... we planted a garden and worked hard to tend the vegetables. We had more than enough to last through the winter. We helped my mother prepare all the vegetables cleaning and blanching and bagging all the vegetables. We took several bags down the street to a neighbor who was having money troubles. She appreciated the vegetables. A few days later, My mother got a call from a community kitchen, their freezer had broke down, would we like to come and get the food that they had in that freezer before it thawed. We got boxes of frozen pizza (mom never bought those) Ice cream. Hot dogs and hamburger and many other things. Again my mother made a box up for the neighbor down the street, because we were blessed. A day or two later My mom ran into a old friend she had not seen in many years. She told my mom that she was dating a bread man and had a freezer full of day old bread, little Debbie cakes, moon pies etc. Would us kids like some? We also shared with the neighbor.
My mom likes to say because she shared she was re payed 10 fold.
I have experienced this time and time again. I have witnessed this many times.
I was in a second hand store and over heard a lady asking if there was any Christmas decoration she could buy for the few dollars she had. She was getting her children home from foster care and wanted to make it Christmas in her apartment. There was none in the store to be had. But another lady offered to give her, her Christmas decorations because her kids were not coming home they were in foster care. Not a pleasant Situation but, why were thees two Lady's in the same store in ear shot of each other.
Does sharing the things you are abundant in make room in your life for what you are needing?
I do not know, I know personally I feel good when I am able to share what I have, When I can give some one something that they need or want.
If you do not want to chuck out perfectly good stuff there is plenty of place that will take it as a donation.
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Post by Alexandra on Jun 4, 2008 17:48:47 GMT -5
I have a set amount of money each week for groceries. I buy what I need for the coming week, and if there's money left over I stock up on other things.
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jonnyny
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Post by jonnyny on Jun 4, 2008 21:45:38 GMT -5
For me, and perhaps others, is the perception that I am poverty stricken when I am not. My squalor makes my home, and me too, sometimes look like that.
As I wrote that, I realized that I am truly poverty stricken simply because I have a poverty mentality and have a poverty lifestyle. This is woven into my squalor. I am unsure as to which is cause or effect- the squalor or the poverty thinking and living.
And I'm fairly certain that the answer does not matter. I believe the key is to think and act opposite to those two things. If I think as if and do those things that a nonsqualorer does I will be squalor free.
It seems to be that simple. I have allowed myself to live in squalor and since I have lived with it for nearly ten years now it has become the way that I define myself. And that, for me, is a really huge issue.
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Post by reesa on Jun 5, 2008 4:01:23 GMT -5
I just wanted to say thanks to you guys who gave me advice about the dentist.
My credit is so bad I can't even have a checking account (they will not give me one, no bank will) and no dentist is going to give me credit either. I called around. None here will take new patients who aren't insured, either.
The dental school would be a gerat idea but the one here does not provide any kind of sedation, only novocaine. I have a severe phobia of the dentist (haven't gone in 20 years because I am so scared) and I don't think I am capable of doing this without some form of sedation.
I'm just gonna save money and eat ibuprofen like candy
the universe will give you only what you NEED. You have to go get what you WANT. (dental care is apparently not a NEED hahaha)
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