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Post by dtesposito on Oct 5, 2019 22:03:27 GMT -5
I have probably piled up about half the cards to get rid of, the others are in neat categories but not yet put away. That will be for tomorrow.
Good night everyone, see you in the morning!
Diane
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Post by SetMeFree on Oct 6, 2019 3:31:43 GMT -5
Hey everyone. It's hard to believe a week has passed since It Happened. In some ways it feels so much longer and in others it feels like I just blinked and we're here. I can't post too much because now every little thing said matters. There's been no word from him and I have yet to hear from a lawyer (if he even bothered to get one).
I have been working on the incredibly tedious yet hideously important minutiae for at least 12 hours a day, stopping to cry in-between phone calls, online account stuff, paperwork, etc. The people that frequent the soos chat room are keeping me from just floating away with the huge crashing waves of panic and grief that hit me with no apparent pattern.
I've meant to come and post in here, but time gets away from me and before I know it, it's time to lie down and close my eyes for a few hours. That's the new version of sleep here.
I don't know what I would do without you all. This forum, this thread, the chatroom are all keeping me from "dropping my basket". If you read any of the Ya-Ya books back in the 90's, you will get that reference.
DONE a bunch of legal stuff countless phone calls all piles of papers sorted boxes ordered stayed hydrated ate one meal a day when possible (don't worry: I have a long way to go before I'll waste away) kept catface fed/watered/loved kept litter box scooped emptied 4 huge totes washed 6 bags of laundry got meds signed up to be delivered ordered groceries to be delivered arranged to clear out rented storage unit slept when possible printed several trees' worth of docs for lawyer (not by choice) reached out for support kept Fall chrysanthemums alive kept myself alive found beauty in every day found gratitude every day did not pinch, poke, or bite anyone
NEXT UP (FOR THE DAY) HAHAHAHAHA no...seriously, WHO KNOWS?? But really, seriously... make tea shift Tote Towers to make room for Box Buttes from the Storage Unit find clothes to wear today empty dryer load the washer start washer at 8:30 (alarm set) put groceries away fridge purge cat box garbage out stash stashables empty DW load DW run DW before bed
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Post by dtesposito on Oct 6, 2019 8:22:45 GMT -5
Good morning SetMeFree, glad to hear from you, although sorry to hear that the legal stuff gives you yet more work to do when you have so much already with the apartment.
did not pinch, poke, or bite anyone
There should surely be an award for that!
I'm eating breakfast now, the temperature in here only went down one degree overnight to 68, so that's not too bad. I think I can hold off on the heater for the birds until it goes down another degree or two. I think the high for today will be 65 so it might go down those two degrees by the end of the day.
I have walks in the AM and PM today, just two hours til the first one, so I will probably just putter around with odds and ends until then.
Diane
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Post by TML on Oct 6, 2019 8:45:39 GMT -5
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Post by TML on Oct 6, 2019 8:48:20 GMT -5
Moving my list to Sunday.
Mom has to go to hospital for more chest x-rays so it will be a facetime day.
This weekend it is laundry, trash, pay bills, see Mom, organize, get ready for the week, meal prep, groceries, cat care, self care, make bed, cpap set up, listen to PNP, journal, meds organize, exercise, shred, and set up week schedule.
Cycle - 8 min work times - Saturday ππ²ππ² Sunday π§π»ββοΈπ§π»ββοΈ Saturday πΊ Sunday πΈ
Laundry Wash πΊπΊ Dry πΊ Fold Put Up
Trash πΊπΊπΈ Recycle Pick up bedroom
Med organize πΊπΊ picked up meds at Pharmacy and ordered a refill on one πΈ Get mail πΊ Ordered groceries on pea pod πΈ Went to deli for extras πΈ Put groceries away πΈ Went to pet store for cat supplies πΈ
Called Moms nurse πΈ Called Mom πΈ she said call back later and dont come over as she is tired from hospital this am and tests.
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Post by dtesposito on Oct 6, 2019 8:59:49 GMT -5
Good morning TML! I hope your mom's okay.
TO DO:
Clean up from breakfast Scoop litter pans Wash cat food dishes Order some library books for my senior client
Diane
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Post by dtesposito on Oct 6, 2019 9:48:04 GMT -5
Next:
10 minutes on books Cat feeding Brush teeth Get dog walk bag ready to go
Then off to my walk.
Diane
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Post by creativechaos on Oct 6, 2019 11:47:17 GMT -5
Well... I need to work on my time management skills. I didn't get done as much as i wanted yesterday, and today is supposed to be a day without rain, then back to another week of rain, so this means i will be outside for part of the day. But it's too wet out there presently so I have a few hrs to do here.
last night i went to dinner at garden owners' because she is leaving Mon. for 3 weeks, and i watch over her cats and pet them/feed them. it got cold and i realized i needed to pick my puny crop basil which has already started to turn brown from the cold. while in my overgrown weed patch of a garden, my car keys must've dropped out of the shallow pocket in my sweater! so as soon as it dries out a bit today i will walk over to the garden and weed the two beds the keys could be in and retrace all my steps. couldn't do it in the dark. so that's another thing that i should not have had to add to my list - if i had just made the extra effort to put the keys BACK in the ignition after i got something out of the car! this morning i dreamed i found my set of spare car keys. ha ha. i wish! they've been "misplaced" for months.
today's list looks much like yesterday's except, no sewing! i didn't like the thing i worked on yesterday so i think i will give it back to the lady who gave it to me, for her to finish
the rest of my day looks like: plants, dishes, cat care, work on piles, chip away at papers, keep finding clothes to consign and other items to donate; possible store run, and make pesto. the soup can wait.
dtesposito; it makes perfect sense what you said about plant acquiring having to do with knowing you were going to lose your dear cat within a year. I'm glad those living things are bringing you joy now, and no cats are tempted to sabotage them. I'm always awed by how much you get done and how well you break it down into smaller steps. WTG on getting rid of half the cards and working on books and the things you said you would do. I enjoy reading how you make decisions about what stays and what goes, in a rational realistic way. i'm hoping that with practice i can build my decision-making muscles more realistically and learn from those of you who make this look easy by breaking things down into smaller do-able steps. magda, good luck on your financial decisions, and WTG on processing all those papers. papers are the hardest, partially because it takes a LOT of them gone to make any visual or space difference - plus so many of them entail jobs to do that we'd rather not do. ohblondie, i hope your stomach feels much better today. oust; great job on emptying two boxes of papers and having a big bag of trash to go out! mylittlescholar, WTG on continuing to plan for your move and working out the numbers and when to sell the house TML; i hope your mom's x ray comes out ok. i love how you break down tasks and get so much done. SetMeFree; hugs your way and i'm so sorry - and crying between phone calls is ok, it relieves the pressure of too much to do and none of it happy. but you are DOING it anyway. i wish you continued strength and fortitude to get through this. i love how you put gratitude in your day anyway, and resist the urge to poke, pinch, or bite someone, even in the worst of situations.
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Post by dtesposito on Oct 6, 2019 11:57:29 GMT -5
Good afternoon CC, ugh, what rotten luck to drop your keys in the dark. Good thing you were able to get a ride home.
I'm home from my walk, I had a snack because I want to eat lunch a little later.
TO DO:
Put away receipts for September Decide which 2 cat carriers to put downstairs 10 minutes on books Cat feeding
Diane
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Post by dtesposito on Oct 6, 2019 13:01:40 GMT -5
Next:
Reduce paper in computer desk basket an inch so it's not overflowing Empty dehumidifier Cover dehumidifier and put away Bring out space heater
Diane
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Post by oust on Oct 6, 2019 13:04:54 GMT -5
I'm home from the customer quote and my outside time . Its warmer outside than inside. I have the door open and I'm on the balcony. I spent time walking around nice stores, aswell as in a $700k home. Coming back home looks shabby and very messy. I just ate lunch instead of eating out. Very thrifty.
3700 sf is a big place. All brand new. Very nice, huge windows 2 staircases, 5 or 6 rooms I won't even be going in. They have rooms they won't use.It will be my biggest mcmansion if I get it. People still don't want to pay alot for home Cleaning. I have to price well. I'll keep you all in the loop.
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Post by creativechaos on Oct 6, 2019 13:32:44 GMT -5
good job on the walk, dtesposito! oust, too bad you don't live over here. they pay top dollar for housekeeping - some folks get $50 per hour and standard is $35. gardeners get lower pay than that. good job on thrifty home made lunch!
so far i have: gathered and taken out trash and tossed an old bouquet scoooped cat box, fed him and played with him did the plant care on balconies and indoor plants made a phone call to get a number so i can give away some potted garden plants tossed a pair of socks that annoyed me and a few things i wouldn't have tossed a year ago made a list for today that i can take with me
to do next: eat dishes gather what i'm taking to the garden some PEEPing
looks like rain! foliage is still wet from last night's rain! i won't be liking it in the garden today; i see mud in my near future.
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Post by magda on Oct 6, 2019 13:34:13 GMT -5
Happy Sunday! SetMeFree you are going through so much! TML hope your mom is ok! Everyone else hello Last night I ordered a pizza late for dinner and even paid for delivery! We splurged for two toppings. With the tip thrown in, it was one expensive pizza! It will serve as last nightβs dinner and breakfast/lunch today for me. It was DD dinner and her breakfast today too. And some is left. So I guess it will give us six meals . That makes me feel a little better. This is just one large pizza for the two of us We were supposed to go to an extended family event today but did not I did not sleep well last night, up to 3!! We would have had to leave very early and it is 1.5 hours each way. I just did not feel up to the driving so tired, plus weβd have to leave early for dd homework etc., so I sent my regrets this morning and promptly fell asleep for four hours! Got up Got ready Made bed Did dishes Started making soup. Realized I needed an onion Off to posh grocery for an onion Also bought groceries for the week but w out a list so it took a little longer And that store was so crowded!! Home Put away groceries with DD help Finished making soup Watching football Possibly heading into a nap!!!
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Post by oust on Oct 6, 2019 13:47:07 GMT -5
I just went through another pile of papers that 90% went to to trash. Why is it all even in here? I made the bed Put things away Ate icing....needed something sweet after chilli
Will sit for a while then back to it.
Just booked a massage for tomorrow.
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Post by dtesposito on Oct 6, 2019 13:52:12 GMT -5
5 or 6 rooms I won't even be going in. They have rooms they won't use.
Well good heavens, why did they buy or build a place so big they won't even use it? Oust, don't lower your price to a point where it's not worth it to do the work. If you're good, you'll get referrals, and people will be willing to pay your cost as long as it isn't way out of range. There are always people who push to get a bargain, but if they can afford to buy a house with rooms they don't even need, they can afford to pay you a decent wage.
and a few things i wouldn't have tossed a year ago
A-HA! You see, mindsets can change. You have to work at it though. I know swampy says she's actually written out a list of categories of things in order of how hard they are to release--CC, have you ever done that? I think it helps to see a LONG list of EVERY category of thing with the most precious items on top, and then the least at the bottom. It's a lot easier to visualize a finite space and your most precious things in it--and then to work on letting the lower valued items go. I've never made that list on paper although I have made it mentally. At the very top would be books, then paper items (like calendars that I save because I love the pictures, etc.) and then probably CDs. Maybe I should add plants up there, but I think of plants not as items but as living things--just like I wouldn't put my animals on a list like this, because they are family. I don't think of plants as family, but they are not at the level of things either.
Anyway, I have given away or sold literally thousands of books (still have a few thousand probably, in the interest of full disclosure) so it IS possible to change the way we look at things without giving up our value system.
Okay, now it's time for lunch.
Diane
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