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Post by success19 on Feb 15, 2010 22:47:33 GMT -5
I am watching Hoarders tonight and ripping up old clothes to toss out and trying to get over the guilt of throwing out stuff. I do find this show a big incentive to make a change.
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Post by success19 on Feb 15, 2010 23:31:05 GMT -5
I must do this faster - I so want to get out of dodge and this stuff is just holding me back from doing that.
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Post by CrimsonKat on Feb 16, 2010 5:02:52 GMT -5
this is a biggie for me. i cannot throw perfectly good stuff away. but i can give it away. my new system (that is working very well for actually getting stuff out of here) is that my DH takes it to his work and offers it to co-wkers. whatever they don't take in a few days, my DH takes it straight to goodwill after work. it does not come back into the apartment! and i am only allowed to ask what was taken, NOT what was left behind. then i can focus on the positive part of what stuff has a new home.
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Post by success19 on Feb 16, 2010 11:03:55 GMT -5
Interesting how we have different ways of being able to toss it out.
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Post by woolybooger on Feb 16, 2010 12:18:03 GMT -5
One thing that helps me get clothes out,is that I put them in a bag and put them in my passenger seat of my car.Then when I drive by the metal charity box (mailbox style) I can just drop them in.I once had a very uncomfortable situation when I tried to donate some things,and the employees upended the boxes and cherry picked what they'd take out of them.I'd rather theyd accepted it all and just thrown out what they didnt want to sell once I was gone.
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Post by fluffernut - now Jannie on Feb 16, 2010 12:36:29 GMT -5
Once when I de-junked my home, I took every useful item and put it in my office breakroom. With a sign-"Free. take anything you want." I was a little embarassed when one of my co-workers recognized a porcelain candy dish she had give me as a wedding gift years earlier. Was my face red!
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Post by fluffernut - now Jannie on Feb 16, 2010 12:38:05 GMT -5
I like to watch Hoarders. I see those pathetic people and gloat "I'm not like that....My place isn't nearly as bad as that." Like He//.
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Post by success19 on Feb 16, 2010 17:28:08 GMT -5
If I owned my own home rather than an apartment - I probably could get there - most of the hoarders have no one to account to - unless the social services step in or a family member. I did see alot of intense anger issues on last nights show - I can't say I am much better - I just angry at myself more than other people - which is no better in the long run.
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Post by illuminata on Feb 17, 2010 3:29:10 GMT -5
When I get stuck on whether or not to get rid of something, I ask myself: "Is this helping me or holding me back?" Most of the time, it is holding me back, so out it goes. There are some useful items I try to sack up for our food pantry (we also have free clothing or gently used household items), but if I have to stop and wonder about whether or not somebody might be able to use it or fix it up or clean it up, 99% of the time it is destined for the trash.
And I feel no guilt whatsoever about it. This is survival...it's gonna be it or me, and I don't plan on losing.
My husband, however...I have a really hard time with him, mainly because he makes the money and gets mad if he thinks it is being "wasted". He still gets stuck on, "I paid X dollars for that!" I'm like, "Yeah...ten years ago! It's worn out! Move on!" He still has the mindset, undoubtedly inherited from his parents, that you NEVER throw out anything useful, especially if you paid good money for it. I do too, and I used to think that way, but not any more with most things. I tell him all the time that certain things are NOT made to last forever, that companies MAKE them to break after so long on PURPOSE so you will buy MORE of their products. Once it IS broken, you are supposed to move on and get a new one.
He also gets mad at me when I throw out plastic containers. I think he remembers the old Tupperware days, when that stuff was super expensive and you could only get it from dealers. I keep telling him that you can get them anywhere now for el grande cheapo, and I'd spend more money on the water and the gas heating up the water to wash out the containers that it would be for me to just get new ones for a buck while I'm already in town. I mean, after a while they just get gross and unhygienic anyway. He's learning but veeeeeeeery slowly.
Anyway. I look at it as a fight to the death and I ain't dyin', not in this fight at least.
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Deleted
Joined: January 1970
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Mar 15, 2010 15:52:33 GMT -5
When I get stuck on whether or not to get rid of something, I ask myself: "Is this helping me or holding me back?" Most of the time, it is holding me back, so out it goes. Great advice! I plan to adopt that as my mantra during my upcoming closet cleanout. I'm pretty good about throwing out miscellaneous stuff, but clothes are a source of anxiety for me because I grew up without enough. This is survival...it's gonna be it or me, and I don't plan on losing. Yes, it really is about survival and health. It wasn't until I did my first big declutter that I realized how much energy--physical and emotional--was being drained by having to deal with broken/spoiled/dirty/embarrassing things that weren't serving me. My husband, however...I have a really hard time with him, mainly because he makes the money and gets mad if he thinks it is being "wasted". He still gets stuck on, "I paid X dollars for that!" I'm like, "Yeah...ten years ago! It's worn out! Move on!" He still has the mindset, undoubtedly inherited from his parents, that you NEVER throw out anything useful, especially if you paid good money for it. I do too, and I used to think that way, but not any more with most things. My dad used to say (in a derisive tone of voice), "You must be rich if you can afford to throw away your things". It took me a while to realize that yes, I *am* rich enough to throw away many things, and in fact I might get richer if I focus on what I need NOW rather than what I might need "someday".
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Post by Butterfly on Mar 15, 2010 17:35:49 GMT -5
...ripping up old clothes to toss out... Just curious why you're ripping up the clothes before throwing them away?
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Mar 15, 2010 17:52:06 GMT -5
...ripping up old clothes to toss out... Just curious why you're ripping up the clothes before throwing them away? For items that might seem difficult to discard: Some of us might be tempted to retrieve items from the trash before the trash collection truck arrives. One tactic we sometimes use ... is to rip up, cut up, soil, chop up, or smash ... such items ... before putting them into the trash. This is done in order to guard against the temptation to retrieve the items from the trash. It's a way of committing to discarding. It can also be therapeutic, in that you can vent your rage on the fact that stuff has held you captive. For example: see Maizy and the Mason Jars here: www.squalorsurvivors.com/stories/maizy.shtml -
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Post by messymimi on Mar 15, 2010 18:23:27 GMT -5
We cannot keep stuff from the landfill by turning our homes into an extension of the dump.
After we have cleared out some and gotten to a better place, we will have the time and ability to sort/donate/recycle/freecycle/sell/etc.
Meanwhile, amnesty.
messymimi
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Post by success19 on Mar 15, 2010 18:52:09 GMT -5
Yes I will retrieve if I do not destroy it - I know for others - giving away works - not for me - maybe someday it will work.
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kathysmith
New Member
Joined: January 2010
Posts: 15
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Post by kathysmith on Mar 15, 2010 20:10:04 GMT -5
Freecycle for small things. freecycle.org Put big things on the curb with a FREE sign it.
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