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Post by bigrae on Apr 29, 2010 10:12:58 GMT -5
keep up with all the daily stuff when you are working on the rest of the house.
I am finding that as I work on the piles of crapola and reduce the obvious rubbish throughout the house that the dish washing and whatever area I am not working on get neglected and create a whole new problem.
Other household members notice the daily stuff not getting done but find it difficult to notice the reducing mess as I am slowly picking through the layers on the floor.
I wonder if they just tuned out the foot deep mess and have not twigged that in some areas the floor level has decreased.
I cant do this quickly but the process is so slow I am frustrated with myself
BigRae
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Post by dtesposito on Apr 29, 2010 11:54:55 GMT -5
Bigrae, I agree that the quick fixes don't usually work (like throwing everything into a box and hiding it) so your progress WILL be slow. Sometimes it's discouragingly slow because you can work for hours and only clear a little space. But if you're clearing it by throwing out what you don't need and creating a workable storage place for what you want to keep, it's permanent change. I don't know what your household situation is, but maybe the people noticing that the daily jobs aren't getting done could pitch in and help so you could continue decluttering--wouldn't they appreciate a decluttered place too? I know, easier said then done on getting help sometimes! The good thing too is that as you declutter, your everyday jobs will be done more quickly because you won't have as much stuff to move around/step over/trip over as you are working. Don't give up, you'll feel so much better as you start seeing results! Diane
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Post by gottaproblem on Apr 29, 2010 13:06:38 GMT -5
Good job at getting the piles down. It is hard for others to see. If you came to my house right now you would see a big mess. I have been getting rid of stuff and I know there is a difference, but it hardly shows to anyone else.
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Post by success19 on Apr 29, 2010 13:51:16 GMT -5
Maybe if other household members see stuff not getting done - they could do that stuff?
I know I have boxes and pile everywhere - all used to be contained in corners and closets - which are much emptier - the stuff is now sitting out ready to be gone through again. Someone who didn't know what it did look like would think it is really messy - but it is just open and out - rather than hidden away. And there is much less of it.
You do what you have to do the way you think it has to be done.
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Post by eagle on Apr 29, 2010 22:10:24 GMT -5
How do I manage to maintain the squalor-free areas while working on de-squaloring other areas?
1. Written list with regular maintenance things at the top. 2. Use a timer to regulate how much time I spend doing specific tasks 3. Stick to my routines, some of which are daily laundry, dishes done as I use them, etc. 4. Alternate tasks to create variety in my day AND to mix mainenance with other tasks 5. Refer to my written list frequently throughout the day to update progress
Yes, sometimes our families just don't see the progress we know we are making. That's disappointing. My husband is the same way. Just a couple of days ago, when I was showing him some progress I was making in our back yard, he totally missed the point and said "I wish we could get rid of all that crap against the fence." No acknowlegment of the work I had already done & how much 'crap' was already gone, all by my own hand, with no help from him.
My initial internal reaction was anger. But what I did was (probably not in the kindest tone) was to say that I had already thrown out 3 - 55 gallon bags of trash AND filled two garbage cans with weeds in the past 2 weeks AND that he didn't notice because he wasn't here when I was doing the work. AND that I have also been working at putting away things in the basement (the basement is his pervue, but I didn't say that.) I mentioned the numbers of hours I spend working in the yard and said "I did good. I have made a lot of progress and I did good." I didn't really expect him to acknowledge that fact. I thought I was going to just have to walk away in a huff or something, but he did say it looked good and I had made a lot of progress.
It's a real pain in the neck when they have to be force-fed how to properly treat us, isn't it?
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hopehope
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Apr 30, 2010 0:24:00 GMT -5
I got really anal and repetitive and slow and persisitent on doing the daily maintenance stuff -- so that:
1. it would grind in as habits. 2. it would become much eassier and faster than in the beginning. 3. it would become unconscious and easier. 4. the additional unlooked for benefit -- it became so that it was/is uncomfortable to me not to see those areas cleared and set right. like not brushing your teeth.
as lioness once said -- i use the DA method transposed to clutter -- deal with current/daily stuff first -- and the back stuff comes after.
sometimes I chafe under this -- then i remember -- how incredibly much easier it is to me to deal with stuff that happens -- spills, breakage, whatever -- while i can actually still get around on the floor -- etc.
yes it takes f-ing forever and it is a total drag. i hear ya.
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Post by lizzie on Apr 30, 2010 3:51:39 GMT -5
Hi BigRae, well done in the ongoing battle! I reckon that the daily stuff/maintenance has to come FIRST because that will be the same every day, and it preserves the areas you have already sorted.
Then whatever leftover amount of time you have allocated, goes to whatever your next immediate clutter/cleaning challenge is. But DEFENDING the already cleaned/sorted areas has highest priority - maintenance is such a different thing to clutter removal/deep cleaning, it has taken me many years to get some understanding that that is how i prevent things from sliding backwards/calling all their friends over to form new piles etc.
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Post by lizzie on Apr 30, 2010 3:56:20 GMT -5
oh, and as you are not a servant, other household members need to be pulling their weight with their own participation in household maintenance!! It is good that they have an awareness that the stuff is not getting done, , the next step is for them to have a more active role in the doing of things! A friend of mine (male) who keeps a very clean house - when his mother visits she even runs her fingers along the tops of the doors checking for dust. I told him if she did that in my house I would be slamming those doors quick smart! And, who knew DUST bothered to lie around on the top of doors, anyway??
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Post by jkai3 on Apr 30, 2010 8:06:36 GMT -5
Ahh Dear One Bigrae, sorry that family isn't noticing all the effort you are making! My family is pretty much like yours, don't notice, unless they can't find something... then it's my fault that I haven't cleaned up the mess according to them. I understand the trying to maintain, while trying to make a dent in other areas. My method is our "Listzilla" forum. I post mainly on the "Working in Threes" thread to keep focused on maintenance, & try to inject a few other areas I'm trying to clear. For me, it has made a Hugh difference! I can do three things, & think about the next three things I would like to accomplish. The Dear Ones there are wonderful with their encouragement, support, & understanding! I also remind myself daily, that this did not happen in one day, so it can't be cleaned all in one day. Most importantly, I am doing this for me, I am proud of what I have done even if my family doesn't notice. Your doing GREAT! Slow, but sure is the way to go! Jkai3
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Post by mafixit on Apr 30, 2010 9:15:27 GMT -5
as someone who doesn't get any help from the rest of the family, when I tackle one of my piles the dishes pile up in the sink, and laundry takes a backseat.. sometimes I need a break from the routine stuff and taking on one of my most dreaded tasks doesn't seem as intimidating.
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Post by dtesposito on Apr 30, 2010 9:28:33 GMT -5
if she did that in my house I would be slamming those doors quick smart!
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Post by StuffNoMore on Apr 30, 2010 10:27:35 GMT -5
I found maintaining and continuing the decluttering process the hardest. Actually, I found the decluttering the most satisfying since I saw that instant gratification. When you see mountains turning into mole hills then maintaining an already clean area seemed so darn boring. Took me a couple of months to adjust to it. But once it's all done you look back and realize the rewards you can reap are unsurmountable. It took me 3 months to get my home into maintenance by myself and that was 2 weeks a month off from work just continually decluttering with only stopping to visit pp.com, eat and a few hours of sleep. You can do it bigrae too!!! Hugs SNM
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Post by howardsgirlfriend on Apr 30, 2010 12:38:05 GMT -5
The ratio of maintenance to progress is going to change as you go along. As more areas are cleared, they'll need maintenance, which will take more time; the desqualoring will grow more difficult as finish clearing the easier clutter, and work your way towards the more difficult items.
This is a sign of sustained progress! Do not allow the lack of drama to distract you from this fact.
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Post by blessedapt on Apr 30, 2010 21:43:52 GMT -5
Hi, I understand exactly where you are coming from, because I made the commitment to reclaim my living area and maintain on a regular basis back in late January (when I joined this board) and I'm still working away. Some days it's like water dripping on a rock...I begin to wonder if there's any progress....but I have finally installed one good routine for when I come home from work (hanging up my coat, taking off my shoes and putting them away, hanging my keys in the same place, putting anything I've brought with me away, etc.). It's taken me years to get that one routine down, but at least I've now done it and I have found it's saved me so much time! (No more looking for keys, shoes, etc.) And my bathroom is now manageable...I only have a super clean in there every week and only takes me 20-30 minutes to scrub everything and it's all sparkling and neat! So you will see that once you are maintaining, it won't take as much time as it did (or at least that's my experience) to clean up the mess in the first place. That's my motivation, especially on days when I feel down and out.
Please know that I am cheering you on!
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Post by CrimsonKat on May 1, 2010 23:07:33 GMT -5
lately, i find that i am resenting and resistant to maintenance. what i do is set the timer (microwave) for 15 mins, and say to myself that i will do daily clean-up stuff until that bell rings because anyone can do anything for 15 mins, including me. it's amazing how much i actually get done. dishes, wiping counters, picking up floors, straightening coffee table, sorting mail, wiping down bathroom area, whatever. i can usually get at least one area done in 15 mins. sometimes i only do this once a day, sometimes more. and things get done. yay.
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