|
|
Post by usedtobeneat on Jul 10, 2010 18:45:41 GMT -5
My husband is an electrician and has done residential repair work many times. I was talking to him recently about not wanting to let the AC guy in because the house is so bad, but he told me that he's been in places a hundred times worse, many times. Even though I have dog crap and pee all over my bedroom carpet and it stinks to high heaven in the house, and I can't clean up the bedroom floor until I get rid of the boxes in there, he said he's seen worse. Much worse. He said it's usually the rule rather than the exception that a house is messy, and about one in ten calls is a house that is off the charts messy. He said they don't even think twice about it, and often times, they live in houses either just as messy, almost as messy, or messier than the house they go to.
Almost always I do assume that everyone else lives in a clean and neat house with nicer stuff than we have. This makes me hesitant to let anyone in, but assuming how people live can be a very silly thing to do, because we all know how we live, and since we go to all the trouble to hide it, we know that others assume we all live in a clean house. We simply assume that we are a very small minority.
It made me feel a lot better, and I wanted to pass along the information to ya'll.
|
|
|
|
Post by uualto1973 on Jul 11, 2010 2:32:57 GMT -5
I needed this reminder. My thinking is always that "nearly everyone else", or at least "normal people" keep their houses looking nice. I still think that it's important not to be too comfortable or accepting of our situations. Squalor is NOT acceptable even if it is more common than we realize. But when things like the washing machine or dishwasher break down (which quickly leads to more mess) it's good to know that repair men probably don't care about the mess nearly as much as we think they do.
|
|
|
|
Post by ohblondie on Jul 11, 2010 13:03:58 GMT -5
oh my goodness- I was JUST going to start a thread about this on friday!
I have gone through two summers with no AC because I did not want to let the repairman in the house (I also did not want to pay high utility bills from running hte AC but that is another story)
ANyway- I live in the great North east (NY) and we just had a horrible hot spell. So we called the AC guy to come fix the unit. I vac'd, cleared paths, mopped the floors- everything to make it a little less messy and smell a little less like dog and dog pee. I was going to leave while the repairman was there.
Well- HE NEVER CAME INSIDE!! He did all of his work outside! I guess the AC unit is outside and he fixed the compressor right there! All that worry for nothing!
But to address the saecond part of the post- my husband thinks we are the only people with a messy house. Most of o0ur friends are not as bad as we are- but only a few of our family/friends are super cleanies. It does not help that my mom and my sister are two of them!!
I also can't get it thru his ehad that MOST husbands help around the house. He sits and watches tv all day and night. I can't even get him to cook. If I dont make dinner- he makes the kids fend for themselves.
UGH- I fell a vent coming on so I will end this now.
Good day everyone!
|
|
|
|
Post by messymimi on Jul 11, 2010 15:33:47 GMT -5
I agree that they usually do not care at all, unless they see something truly unsafe, or signs of abused or neglected kids or pets.
Most of the people who come in to repair or look at stuff here know us, and some of them, my Sweetie has been to their houses. He tells me they are as bad as us and worse, some of them.
messymimi
|
|
|
|
Post by Starting Again on Jul 12, 2010 13:06:17 GMT -5
This has been a very helpful thread! I know repairmen sometimes say "my place is even worse" and "I'm just here to do my job", but I have just tended to think "you are just saying that to make me feel better". It is good to be reminded that many people out there really are as messy and messier than me, and that repairmen have seen it all.
One bad experience I had was with a neighbor who came up to look at my washing machine because he thought it was leaking down on his place. I saw his condo and it was really spic-and-span. I actually started to cry when I said he could come in. I guess being really messy is a bad thing and one result of it is definitely some embarrassment. But it is good to know that others have the same problem - and that is one reason I really like this board!
|
|
kathbrant
New Member
Joined: July 2010
Posts: 19
|
Post by kathbrant on Jul 12, 2010 14:36:17 GMT -5
This is all very true, but, what if the repairman is also your landlord? He lives in the adjoined house right next door. I lived without heat last winter, because of it. I also cant wash dishes in the kitchen for over a year, because of something in the faucet. Probably something very simple. My daughter came, and said, "Mom , your house looks good enough" But I still couldnt bear for him to come in.
|
|
|
|
Post by Rory on Jul 12, 2010 15:00:58 GMT -5
Thanks for a helpful post. In the past I've been too embarassed to let folks in.
|
|
|
|
Post by usedtobeneat on Jul 12, 2010 20:11:25 GMT -5
If the repairman is your landlord, you might want to see if you can hire somebody else to fix what's wrong and pay for it yourself until you can get cleaned up enough to let the landlord in. Or possibly keep the receipt and give it to him to see if he would reimburse you. If you can find a friend or relative who does that kind of work for a living, you could get it done cheaper and better quality by them. Tell him you were just trying to save him the time and money, and throw some side work to your friend.
|
|
|
|
Post by midlife on Jul 13, 2010 10:38:25 GMT -5
The people where my husband works have a lot of parties, and everyone's house always looks fabulous when it's their turn to host the reception for a visiting professor, or the end-of-term barbecue or whatever. And we were all talking about it at the last party, and every single family who had kids said "Are you kidding? Do you think our house looks like that all the time? We cleaned for two weeks to be able to host that party!" But because we're not casual friends with any of those people, we don't see their houses except for at parties. And you think, "Well, maybe they're just being modest because no one like to brag about being neat," but no, the one time that someone from the department came down with a horrible stomach flu while their spouse was out of town and called me to drop off some supplies, I could see that when they're not party-ready, their house looks just like ours! Clutter everywhere!
Yes, there are people who are neat all the time. I am unfortunately related to several of them. But I don't think it's "normal". They're the exceptions.
|
|
|
|
Post by puppybox on Jul 13, 2010 11:13:49 GMT -5
let em in, I agree.
I let repairmen in when I had dog poo all over the place and crazy knee high clutter- I cleared a path. They may or may not have alerted my landlord (they were assosicated with the company that rented the apt. out for the landlord) but nobody followed up. they acted surprised initially "whoa!" but then just got down to business.
you will feel intense shame and embarrassment BUT 1) you CAN"T die from it even though it feels so severe you think you might and 2)you will feel shame and embarrassment anyway if you don't let them in, every time you think about how you wish you could get X fixed. so you might as well have the X fixed along with your pain.
|
|
escape
New Member
Joined: August 2008
Posts: 89 
|
Post by escape on Jul 15, 2010 13:56:28 GMT -5
I've delivered stuff my whole life, from food to phonebooks to newspapers to flyers. I've been to thousands of houses. At least a few of them must have been messies & hoarders, but I'm trying to remember if I thought anything about it at the time or even noticed. I can only think of once that it made any impression. That lady hoarded little yappy dogs, maybe dozens of them. I remember because when I delivered to her every morning they all came rushing out their doggy door into their yard to greet me. Don't remember much about the inside of the house, though.
-escape
|
|
|
|
Post by omgwhatisthatsmell on Jul 16, 2010 13:52:06 GMT -5
I suppose there must be levels of squalor and I am pretty sure I am way deep. Discovery Studios hired an electrician to do two hours work at my house while they were here filming and the electrician said that he could not repair the electrical shorts until the clutter was picked up in the affected rooms. I was terribly embarrassed. I hope they don't air that.
|
|
