hopehope
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Aug 22, 2010 20:40:19 GMT -5
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Post by dtesposito on Aug 22, 2010 21:41:19 GMT -5
omg--I remembered to watch the show tonight! I thought it was very well done, it was sympathetic and I was so happy to see your sisters and son helping you. I am so sorry to hear the story of your boyfriend, I can't imagine going through something like that and it is no wonder that you had to have time to recover from it. I don't know how long in advance the show is filmed--how are you doing now? Is your son still at home? I'm sorry that the filming wasn't an entirely positive experience, I guess it can't be when the show has to make you fit a certain format and tell the whole story in half an hour. But I think it's fantastic that you were able to share your story, as others in this thread have said, you help a whole lot of people when you let people know they're not alone in their struggles. Diane
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Post by luckyleprechaun on Aug 22, 2010 22:15:01 GMT -5
OH I missed it because I do not have the directv any longer....I did not go to mom's at the right time to see it...I went to get lawnmower after 9pm central....I am sure the group here who saw it will compliment you on this show....hugs luckyleprechaun
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MiSC
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 1,611
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Post by MiSC on Aug 22, 2010 23:41:01 GMT -5
Are you Mary or Deborah? I just remembered to turn it on and I'm not sure which is you.
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Post by toomuchstuph on Aug 23, 2010 2:35:00 GMT -5
I watched your episode tonight omg and there were so many times during the show I just wanted to hop in my car and drive across country to you! I have to tell you that you certainly didn't look like a doofus! You came across as a sensitive smart woman who got overwhelmed. It was also very clear to me that your sisters and son both love you very very much.
Even without having read your post I can sort of see what you meant about the organizer. I'm sure she meant well - but she definitely had her own agenda from the get go and I'd have really liked if she had worked with you more rather than sort of dictating what would happen. I know that many hours of work were distilled down to 20 or 25 minutes airtime of your segment so I may have the wrong impression. I didn't get the feeling she was bad....just not taking the approach that might have worked best for you.
Now, please forgive me if I'm overstepping here (and I FULLY acknowledge that I may well be doing so)... are there any PTSD groups or therapy groups or private therapy you might be able to take advantage of? Even in the short few minutes I saw you, there was a sense that so much of what has happened in your life is still bottled deep inside and has some control over your daily life.
You deserve so much - you're capable of so much and I do truly hope you're able to continue along the path of making your home a peaceful place for you to be. Even if your son does leave for school, YOU need and deserve a peaceful safe home and haven.
Wishing you continued success!
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Post by kiddledo on Aug 23, 2010 10:06:19 GMT -5
May I echo toomuchstuph, You did wonderful...you were dignified..you were very very brave. And you seemed to be working through your tragic domestic/drug stress..but like toomuchstuph, I also felt that your pain was still very, very close and seemed unresolved. Having lived in domestic violence for 30 years and out of it for 16, things still raise their ugly head and drive me still today. The words, memories and recriminations continue. Again, good job..you DO deserve the best
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Post by eagle on Aug 23, 2010 10:35:59 GMT -5
I assume from your story, you are the lady with the horse collection. No doofus there. Anyway, I did see part of it, but sadly fell asleep and missed the big 'reveal'. I am sure it looked lovely in the end.
I am sorry it didn't work out exactly as you had hoped. But I do hope you are re-learning maintenance, as that is so important to keep you out of a return to squalor.
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Post by cleanchallenged on Aug 23, 2010 14:23:15 GMT -5
I saw your episode last night. And wanted to thank you for putting yourself out there, like that. If we we're all that brave, more people would understand us better. You did not look like a "doofus" at all! I could tell you and your son love each other very much. And its nice to see you have supportive sisters who rolled up their sleeves and came over to help! I also wanted to hug you when you were talking about your boyfriend, I cannot imagine going through that, you are a very strong person to be able to come to terms, and begin the process of dealing with the squalor. Much Much Much Respect for you!!! And your kitchen looked gorgeous! I was so envious, I want a kitchen like that.
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Post by downandout on Aug 23, 2010 15:31:56 GMT -5
you didnt look like a doofus to me either! and i loved your horse collection ! they reminded me of the horses i had as a kid i had a nice collection too but my parents made me give them all away. anyway even tho the organizer didnt do so well for you i have to say that your house looked really really good afterwards!! i love your kitchen too so big!! lots of counterspace!! and it must be wonderful to have the use of your bathroom again
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Post by notsomessyshell on Aug 23, 2010 16:12:28 GMT -5
I watched, too. Even though I was supposed to be asleep early for an early morning work day. I couldn't miss it! You are not a doofus. You were so articulate. I could feel your pain. So much to happen to a person. You are a strong woman to have come through so much. I loved the horses. Neat collection. I look forward to seeing them again in your after pics. Your son is seems like a great kid. I love how you each were concerned for the other regarding the clean up.
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Post by homesteph on Aug 23, 2010 22:30:23 GMT -5
Oh I am watching your episode now. Not one doofus in sight. Just a very very brave woman who has rasied an awesome loving son.
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Post by puppybox on Aug 23, 2010 23:15:07 GMT -5
I agree with the others. not doofus at all. and you really seemed ready to change. ready to do it. i have no doubt you will succeed despite the bad organiser person.
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eeyore
New Member
Joined: August 2010
Posts: 5
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Post by eeyore on Aug 24, 2010 22:25:22 GMT -5
Hello...I didn't get a chance to watch the whole episode but you did great! There is no way that I could have enough courage to go on that show!
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Post by eatingbonbons on Aug 24, 2010 22:44:38 GMT -5
I have a model horse collection, too, so I was totally drawn in. It is a very satisfying hobby for me and I could see that it's the same for you. I had a great time naming your models as they popped up. I hope your organizer didn't put them in plastic bags. Great work, girl!
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Post by survivorgurl on Aug 24, 2010 22:56:51 GMT -5
Thank you very much for having the courage to do this. You are helping others to understand our situation. I was a great mom with a messy house. My children were given to my abuser 4 years ago, due to this fact. I have not seen them since January. So remember, you are not only helping people who have homes like ours, but you are helping social workers, police, etc. to see that we are real people who just have difficulty in this area. The next time they walk into a home like mine, they may have a little more understanding and compassion. Thank you!
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