my2cats
New Member
Joined: July 2008
Posts: 63 
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Post by my2cats on Sept 11, 2010 20:43:19 GMT -5
This may already be a post here somewhere, apologies if so - but I thought it'd be interesting to post some of the events that cause the most "fear" because of your squalor. For me? Nothing strikes terror into my heart like the smoke alarm going off. I live in an apartment building with all the smoke alarms linked, so if a smoke alarm goes off ANYWHERE in the building, mine sounds. I'm always terrified though it's just mine, and any moment "management" will descend on my apartment demanding to be let in. My smoke alarm was faulty one time - it wouldn't shut up. I even took out the battery but because it's wired into the ceiling it KEPT GOING. In desperation I had to "accidentally" pull out one of the wires. Then play stupid when I called management a month later to say "I replaced the battery, but now it doesn't work."  Other things - of course a knock on the door is horrible. I'm always sure it's maintenance. I live near the head maintenance guy and after 1) receiving a complaint about odor and 2) him telling me he sometimes jumps over to my balcony to get his cat, I'm crazy paranoid he's looking in all the time. Most of my walls are giant balconies and my cats always mess up the vertical blinds so people can see in. So what causes you to "panic"? (I'm cleaning right now.. and always find reading and posting here first to be motivating.) |
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Post by Meme on Sept 11, 2010 21:49:12 GMT -5
at one time I was afraid of fire-- being caused by too much stuff and not seeing or finding the place it started -- I have smoke alarms in every room--- If I lived in an apartment I would also fear but even for more reason - I would be horrified if I was responsible for some one's death--.
here it is now mandatory the fire departments check fire alarms once a year in apartments and is also done twice a year by landlords-(too many folks removing batteries etc) - there is only 24 hours notice and they can enter even tho you are home-- we have had too many little kids die because of non working fire alarms-
Insurance companies can also check--- with short notice- usually around the time for renewal and they simply don't renew if denied-- and it goes on your record following to other insurance companies now so one cannot bounce around-
I do think fire would be my biggest fear--- hugs from Meme
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Post by phoebepj on Sept 11, 2010 22:10:23 GMT -5
my biggest fear is eviction. My big cat always meows obnoxiously when he's hungry, and i worry that he does it when i'm not home. We're technically not supposed to have animals in the building, but i think my landlord overlooks me because he doesnt really care all that much, plus i pay rent faithfully every month. They've never asked me to sign a new contract/ or any contract for that matter, therefore i live on a month to month basis with them.
I have recieved notes before from the landlord regarding cats, but it was addressed to the apartment below mine, and not mine specifically, the downstairs neighbor to whom it was addressed thought it might address me instead so she put it on my door. it said "cats must be out in 2 days"....funny thing is, that was nearly 4 and a half years ago in the thick of my squalor, and was never followed up. So best i can assume is they really dont care as long as the apartment isnt damaged.
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MiSC
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 1,611
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Post by MiSC on Sept 11, 2010 23:20:21 GMT -5
I've pretty much gotten over my fear of repairmen. We've been out of 3rd degree for a couple of years. But we're still at a very high 2. None of them seem to give a *** what it looks like in here. They just want to do their work and get on with things. There's nothing worthy of a call to any authorities, just a big ol' mess.
The other night I thought I might have to call an ambulance, and rather than have them come in, I was just going to meet them on the porch and not deal with it either way. But I passed out, so it became a non-issue. >insert awkward smile here<
I do live in fear of a friend coming to the door though. Worse, a friend of Colin's. So far I've been able to keep people at arm's length, but I couldn't deal if a friend just knocked on the door because they were in the neighborhood.
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Post by skatters on Sept 11, 2010 23:26:33 GMT -5
I live in fear that I might have to call the landlord, or they might 'stop by'. They did that once, to let me know that they hadn't received rent check, since I always send it early. DS was home. And I had to call them back - and he said the property 'looked fine' - but he didn't come in or anything.
I also live in fear of CPS, coming to take my children away. In reality, I know that my house is not that bad. But I can't seem to shake that fear. Losing my children is my biggest fear in life.
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Post by yearning4order on Sept 12, 2010 0:47:43 GMT -5
When the house was in squalor I was terrified of childrens' services taking my daughter.
I remember one night when she was little, she accidentally called 911 and the police showed up. I was so terrified they were going to come in! Fortunately they didn't.
The house may not be perfect at this point, but I don't live in fear of people dropping by unexpectedly.
These days I live in fear of the house getting out of control again. My office is a real hot spot, and at some point I'll have to try tackling it again as it just seems like a pit of stuff that's all packed in here and can't be used because of how things are crammed in.
The rest of the house feels decent enough for friends to drop in, the kitchen generally gets cleaned once a day.
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Post by puppybox on Sept 12, 2010 9:43:05 GMT -5
my place is not bad anymore, so the only thing I'm still scared of is people being grossed out, or thinking I'm weird, insane, etc.
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Post by def6 on Sept 12, 2010 19:59:47 GMT -5
I'm afraidof spending too much time/energy/life on a mess.
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Post by fluffernut - now Jannie on Sept 13, 2010 8:02:35 GMT -5
I hate creepy-crawlies. Spiders, centipedes, anything with more than 4 legs. Love my cat and dog. There are 2 spiders living in my kitchen window right now. Waiting for winter for them to leave, then I'll get rid of all those webs!
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Post by eagle on Sept 13, 2010 9:04:39 GMT -5
Related to my squalor, my greatest fear used to be a knock on the door. I usually just did not answer the door when the knock came. Then one day, a loud insistant knock brought me to the peephole to look through and the person on the other side looked so much like my father, that I simply opened the door. Not because I wanted my father to see my home in that state, but because I made a split second decision to stop hiding it from my family.
Well, it wasn't my father after all, it was neighbor who had found an envelope I had dropped with a savings certificate in it, with my name on it. He was simply doing the right neighborly thing and returning it to me. He said nothing about the mess he saw behind me as I stood at the door in shock.
As a matter of fact, my parents never came over unannounced, and only visited my home upon invitation anyway.
The other greatest fear I had was that the IRS would take everything I owned, or at least all my money, because I didn't bother to deal with my obligation to file my income tax returns for several years. I feared reading any correspondance from them, too, so I didn't bother to open the mail they sent me, even if I did sign for them when they started to come by certified mail.
Eventually I did manage to face and walk through those fears as well, and I no longer feat the IRS either.
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Post by mafixit on Sept 13, 2010 14:30:28 GMT -5
Having bed bugs and visible cockroaches scare the living daylights out of me. My biggest fear though is needing to call EMS on a day that the clutter is out of control, which can happen rather quickly if I'm not working on it. Having someone from the outside world ask to use my bathroom, is pretty high up on the list.
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Post by StuffNoMore on Sept 13, 2010 15:38:05 GMT -5
My worse fear became my reality which pushed me into decluttering my home and finishing it.
I had to call 911 and having worked in an area hospital in the ER for many years, I knew most of the Medics. Calling 911 meant the Police, Fire and Ambulance came. I had to crawl outside to the ambulance and told them I had a Rottweiler in the house who wouldn't let them in or near me. That was half of the truth as I did have Louie then and could have gotten him outside but then my secret would have been known.
When I did work in the ER my home was immaculate so not being found out was on top of my list even though I was bleeding severely and had to get to the ER right away.
I swore that day I would never be faced with another ordeal such as that and kept my word. Each time I feel like putting off my maintenance, I just remind myself of the horrors I felt that day and how close I came to being found out.
SNM
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squeak
New Member
Joined: September 2010
Posts: 9
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Post by squeak on Sept 14, 2010 1:37:22 GMT -5
I managed to let two central heating guys into the house yesterday to quote for replacing the pipes upstairs. Downstairs is messy but you can walk around, although the yard is full of bin bags until we get a skip. I let them upstairs into my daughter's room, and the bathroom, and one of them listened to me when I said "don't go into the other two bedrooms- they're a mess". But, one of them ignored me and walked straight on into both rooms. I made lots of excuses and said it would all be tidy by the time the work starts, but I was really unhappy that the guy ignored me. That said, I managed to let them in the house, and survive feeling ashamed and humilated, so I feel quite pleased. I also managed, with the help of my little girl and the promise of extra pocket money, to clean up her bedroom and throw out a bag of stuff- and we're finishing it together tonight. This is progress! love Squeak x
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Post by downandout on Sept 14, 2010 7:58:18 GMT -5
i am at work on break so sneaking a bit here but for me its the doorbell. it rang the other day and i nearly jumped out of my skin. even tho most of the house is okay i still panicked thinkgin that they wanted to come in.
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Post by cleanchallenged on Sept 14, 2010 10:13:58 GMT -5
This seems over dramatic being that im only 24 years old. But my fear was death. I didn't want my family/friends to see how I'd been living. I know its morbid but in the back of my head I was always terrified of having some sort of accident that would put me in the hospital or kill me.
Also knocks at the door.. as other people have mentioned. Whenever someone was stopping by they knew to call or whatever in advance because otherwise I wouldnt answer the door. I had to always say I was sleeping and didnt hear them. Which seems odd as well.. people either think your sleeping way to much or theres something else going on.
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