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Post by fluffernut - now Jannie on Nov 23, 2008 8:51:30 GMT -5
What's your worst and best moments in the fight against squalor? Here's mine: Worst, we invited my husband's brother & wife for dessert and coffee. I piled all the loose junk against a wall in the dining room, thinking if it at least "looked" neat we'd be okay. The pile was about four feet high and as long as the wall. Brother's wife was very nice, she aways is, but she kept staring at the pile. I was so embarassed. Best moment came last week. I decided to clean out one box from one closet. About five years agio I lost the opal ring my parents gave me when I graduated high school. I had looked high and low, figured my babysitter had taken it. I had a very heavy heart over losing that gift. Well, I opened the box and there it WAS! I called my Mom and told her what had happened. I'm wearing the ring right now! What's your worst and best squalor tale? Oh, and as a bonus, I also found the ruby earrings DH gave me.
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Post by mariposa on Nov 23, 2008 11:37:35 GMT -5
Don't want to be a downer here, but I think the worst moment was when DH died and I had to call 911 (he had already died though) and in my insane thinking, I actually considered waiting to call until I had cleaned up. That is so shameful to admit, I could only tell you guys. I didn't wait, it's just a thought that flashed in my head as I was going for the phone.
I don't know if I have any "best" moments. I haven't really found anything important so far. Good idea for a thread!
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Post by fluffernut - now Jannie on Nov 23, 2008 11:42:52 GMT -5
My mother in law had a similar thing. Her husband went out for a walk, fell and hit his head. He was bleeding, went into a nearby liquor store. The store employee phoned MIL, who proceeded to CLEAN HER KITCHEN before going to her husband's aid!
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Blackswan
Banned
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 6,388
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Post by Blackswan on Nov 23, 2008 12:35:10 GMT -5
Best story - Finding 100 dollars in my car trunk.
Worst story- Spending 9 years barely able to find my keys, late to work, wearing sloppy clothes, showing the outside world there is something inherently wrong going on in both my house and my head.
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Blue
New Member
Joined: November 2008
Posts: 92
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Post by Blue on Nov 23, 2008 14:44:04 GMT -5
worst story - children services found out about my clutter and apprehended my 4 children... i had everything moved into storage and got 2 of them back with no involvement at all, but they kept the older 2 because they had behavior problems(long story) best story - I know I have a problem and I am determined to beat it for myself, my 7 kids and my 2 grandkids
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Post by Script on Nov 24, 2008 9:24:05 GMT -5
Worst I opened up an ancient box of records (Beethoven symphonies?) and found a squashed dead mummified MOUSE inside.
Second Worst I had hideous black mould growing on the inside of my never-cleaned fridge and my landlord saw this (many years ago).
Best Last month I put outside in construction trash pile an ancient (probably from 1973?) wooden pastry board. I used to use it whenever I made home-made pasta. I no longer do this (too hard on my hands-wrists-arms). Getting rid of it was hard for me, as it meant saying GOOD BYE to a person I used to be (hugely energetic gourmet ultra-cook ready willing and able to do anything in the kitchen). The board had not been used in years. Richard ("Mr Hunk") spotted it and INSTANTLY retrieved it as a work-related tool He was THRILLED.
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Post by fluffychild on Nov 24, 2008 22:29:01 GMT -5
One time I was eliminating things from the basement - I had a tall almost completely used candle. I looked down inside of the tall glass, curled around in cute little balls - 4 dead baby mice. That went outside immediately. Gross
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Post by mouse on Nov 24, 2008 22:44:01 GMT -5
WorstHaving the floor guy tell me he'd never worked on a place which smelled so bad in his entire career (he didn't know that I was the tenant, so he was less than tactful). I was mortified beyond words, but managed to stay nonchalant and nodded and told him it took all sorts to make a world. BestIn the course of one week, three separate people on three separate occasions complimented me on my new place, and told me that it didn't even remotely smell of cat! ~Mouse
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Post by stressedbythemess on Nov 25, 2008 10:56:42 GMT -5
A worst moment does not specifically stand out in my mind, oddly. There's lots of little things - Loosing out on some $$ (not large amounts), being embarassed, etc.
But I do have a best - My bedroom closet (but not bedroom) was clean (it's now the opposite situation sadly), as well as the porch and porch closet. My mom came over and I proudly told her she HAD to come see. And I showed them off to her, proudly, all organized. This is the daughter who for years you couldn't see a spot in her floor for all the papers and stuff, so I think she at least got it..maybe kinda sorta. I dont think she entirely got it.
2nd best - This week, getting to stumble out of bed and not worry about stepping on anything. I've quickly lost the habit of knowing where to step half asleep to avoid crunching, tripping, or anything else. It's nice and feels kinda *** but in the good way!
Other nice one - House guest back when I first started and a little after I had pulled out a lot of things, noticed that the apt was looking a lot cleaner than it normally did. Instead of taking credit, roommate told him I did it all and he was like "cool".
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Post by saffron on Nov 25, 2008 20:26:29 GMT -5
The WORST: Getting that terrified feeling inside when someone knocks on the door, or my sons wanting to come in and I have to make excuses why they can't. My heart starts pounding, I get short of breath, my guts start growling, and I get that awful feeling of disgust and shame, and sadness because of the way I'm living. I want so much to invite everyone in. That will be the BEST.
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Post by crazycatlady on Nov 27, 2008 17:06:04 GMT -5
Great idea for a thread.
I have a couple of worsts that come to mind. Once my teenage daughter called because she thought that she smelled gas. I called my then babysitter, and asked her to go check, because I couldn't leave work and I was so worried about strangers coming in. The sitter wouldn't go, so we called the fire department. (DD had gone over to the neighbors house, just in case.) Everything was fine, but I was so mortified that the fire department was in my messy house. How awful (as others have posted), when faced with an emergency-my mess slowed down my choice to involve emergency personnel.
I also found a perfect mouse skeleton on a file cabinet that sits a few feet from the end of my side of the bed. I slept for days or weeks with that little skeleton there. We have a dropped ceiling in our bedroom, and dh had done some work in the ceiling, so I suppose the little mousie fell out then. But it had been a while, and there the mousie lay. I had cleaned that area, so I know it didn't die there and turn to a skeleton....but it was just gross. And its still gross to think that there are likely more of them up in the ceiling.
I had dh throw the skeleton out right away. Later, in chat, someone suggested showing it to the kids. Or I could have sent it to the school for a science teacher. But I certainly couldn't have told the truth about where I found it!
Best tale-when we had kids coming over for ds's 8th birthday party last year. DS told the first child that arrived that our house USED TO BE full of junk. That sounded so good...used to be.
We are having dd's 13th birthday party tomorrow night, a sleepover. Its pretty wonderful that while I am doing much clean up and preparation, for the most part the house is clean. Just have to vacuum again. Had to sweep away cobwebs, etc, but for the most part my home is cleanish, and it is not ever really embarrassing. We get many messes, but due to having a housekeeper come every two weeks, we have to straighten up so she can clean.
I suppose that is really the BEST part-having help. And that my kids and husband are so helpful, too. We have all learned a lot on our journey out of squalor. Someday I hope to reclaim our storage room of doom that is FULL-and we haven't been in there in years. Babysteps...babysteps!
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Post by fluffernut - now Jannie on Nov 28, 2008 20:16:03 GMT -5
My friend's Mom (over 80 years old) found a dead bat on one of her living room chairs. No telling how it even got into the house.
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Post by reesa on Dec 2, 2008 1:11:14 GMT -5
dead bat...wow worst: in the worst week of my most depressed year I was urinating into a jar in my room. I simply didn't have the energy to get up and walk. I eventually after about five days got up and cleaned myself up. I had to empty that jar best: coming home today and BEING ABLE TO COOK WITH A CLEAN PAN!!!
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Post by reesa on Dec 2, 2008 1:13:07 GMT -5
oh, about the mousy skeleton: I did drywall for a little while back in high school. dead mice in walls and ceilings are very very common in even the neatest house.
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Post by dayeanu on Dec 2, 2008 1:49:50 GMT -5
Worst: I woke up one morning and realized I was doomed to live and die in squallor. All my efforts had failed, all my prayers had gone unanswered. I felt my fate was sealed. Before that, I always told myself that I would get it cleaned up one day.
Second Worst: My grown daughter told me not to worry about the house. If anything happened to me, she would drag my body outside as soon as she called the emergency number, 8^0 so they wouldn't have to come in the house.
Third Worst: Using a bucket for a toilet so I wouldn't have to go in the nasty bathroom.
Fourth Worst: Realizing I had a lovely home that was so trashed and full of junk, I might as well have been living in a box or a tiny .storage shed, for all the enjoyment and benefit I got of my home.
Best: Realizing that anyone , even a 5 year old, could de-clutter my house (by carrying everything outside to the garbage bin.) O.K., I know this is a little over-simplified, because I don't want to throw everything away, but my house could be decluttered simply by removing enough armloads of stuff. It was actually encouraging to me to think that, because if a 5 year old could do it, surely so can I! (I don't have trouble cleaning - I'm a fantastic cleaner. I just can't clean for the clutter.) So my reasoning was that if my house was decluttered, I could clean it spotlessly.
Second Best: I read a little book that said my stuff does not have a life of it's own, it cannot multiply, it is not powerful, it cannot fight me. It is just stuff, and I have control over it. Also, a statement in another book that really blew daylight through the ***, said that my ratty old stuffed animals don't love me, they are just pieces of cloth and stuffing. My emotional self needed to be told that.
Third Best: The photos on Squallor Survivors, that showed me I am not unique.
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