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Post by mallery on Nov 23, 2008 10:24:21 GMT -5
Hey everyone, so happy to have found you all  ! I am a slob and my home is a mess. Most folks don't know that because I look pretty much like everyone else. I pay my bills on time, I wear clean clothes, etc. I feel like my life is a disaster lately. I'm 51, single, no children. I live in the country in an old mobile home, with various indoor and outdoor pets. I work 2 jobs. I feel as though I will never get "caught up" around here. No one comes to visit (I claim that I like it that way, but I think I might like it if when a neighbor stops to chat, as sometimes happens on a nice day, I could say "Would you like to come in for a cup of coffee?". As it is, I'd not answer the door if someone were to knock). There are several reasons why my home is such a mess. I have three small senior dogs, and they have accidents in the house. I have pee pee pads down but sometimes they miss. I clean up the poop right away, and toss the pads when needed, but there is still urine throughout the carpet. I tell myself "I'll give the carpet a thorough cleaning one of these days" but I never follow through. I have 4 cats who are all good about using the litter boxes, but I should change them much more frequently. But that means remembering to buy litter..... Also, I have a big rabbit inside, in a big dog crate, and she's pretty messy with her bedding. I have loads of animal fur and hay all through my home, and I can clean it today, and tomorrow it will be almost as bad. My clutter mostly consists of books, magazines, papers, and stuff that simply doesn't have a place to go. There is less than 800 square feet in here, and it seems like I have too much stuff but it's mostly because the place is so small. I recently ordered 3 book cases from a local furniture store and I think that will be a big help. I was raised by a mother who never lifted a finger where housework was concerned, so I never learned the skills. I used to be better than I am now, when I was married, but I was so bitchy all the time, I think it was a control thing. Also, I think there is a link to my mess and the fact that it keeps me from dating, kind of like unconsciously gaining wait to avoid intimacy. Heck, may as well tell you everything ~ I've been married and divorced 4 times. Lack of time is also a major factor for me. I work evening shift, full time, and I also work mornings for 2-3 hours as a personal care provider. Living out in the country means I must spend hours on the road every day commuting. I could be spending my free time cleaning, but I tell myself that I deserve to relax since I work so hard, so at the end of the day, I pour a glass of wine and sit in front of the computer for an hour, and then I go to bed. I cook healthy meals for myself, and I keep up on the dishes and the laundry. There is no garbage or rotting food, and my clothes are hung up in the closet, yet I feel like I'm living a level 2-3, and I'm embarrassed and unhappy. I feel as though I belong here, and I really need your help. |
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Blackswan
Banned
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 6,388
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Post by Blackswan on Nov 23, 2008 12:15:22 GMT -5
Welcome!
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Post by messymimi on Nov 23, 2008 17:08:58 GMT -5
Welcome, Mallery  !
Would it help to tell yourself that you not only deserve to relax, but to do it in a nice place? Then spending ten minutes of your usual internet hour tossing stuff that has no home would be a gift to yourself, not a burden.
You have my sympathy with the animal fur everywhere -- I sweep up enough of the stuff every month to knit a litter or two of kittens. Again, keeping up with the boxes, the pads, and a quick sweep of the fur/hay each day with a dust mop is a gift you give yourself and your animals.
It's good to have you here.
messymimi
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Post by heylady1 on Nov 23, 2008 17:23:44 GMT -5
Welcome Mallery!! I can relate to the fur situation. Although I only have one dog, he sheds enough for ten! He's also getting older too and I can only hope that he doesn't lose his kidney functions...  With working so much and commuting so much, it's now wonder you're tired!! About the only thing I can suggest is to post in Listzilla about the things you want to get done. It can be a great motivator!! Glad you found us!
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Post by skatters on Nov 24, 2008 0:09:42 GMT -5
Welcome! You are in the right place! I like the idea of an extra 10 minutes a day to declutter. I know, I know, it doesn't sound like much - but you will be surprised!
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Post by crazycatlady on Nov 24, 2008 16:37:20 GMT -5
Welcome, Mallery. I agree with just taking 10 minutes each day-it does make a difference. And keep reading and posting here. The support is amazing, and people help with little pointers about the things you just can't ask anywhere else! 
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Post by notsomessyshell on Nov 25, 2008 3:03:28 GMT -5
Welcome! The 10 to 15 minutes a day really works. Getting one spot really clean and keeping it that way is also a really great incentive for doing more.
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Post by lulu1949 on Nov 25, 2008 18:26:55 GMT -5
Welcome Mallery!
You have come to the right place to get support and reassurance.
I am to the point where I make sure my dishes are done and my sink is shining before I go to bed. The rest of my 800 s.f. trailer is a wreck, but having one clean area is giving me inspiration to gradually go from room to room and toss stuff.
I can also sympathize with your elderly dogs. May I suggest doggie diapers? It would cut down on your clean-up time.
Hang in there.....you can do it !!
Lulu
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papertyger
New Member
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 48
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Post by papertyger on Nov 26, 2008 3:21:48 GMT -5
I can say hand on heart it does work, I started with the clean sink and making the bed, and now have a clean sink a clean work counter ( 1 of the 3) a made bed and half each of two sofas. I also have a routine for cleaning and feeding the birds that takes just 15 mins at night and the same in the morning.
By now after a clean out I would have been in total CHAOS ANYONE can do 15 - 10 mins
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sheepish
New Member
Joined: November 2008
Posts: 51
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Post by sheepish on Nov 26, 2008 12:11:59 GMT -5
You have a lot going for you really in that your bills are paid, you have clean clothes & dishes & are eating properly. If you can do all that & work all of those hours you are to be commended. I got this tip from somewhere - don't remember, but anyway, set your timer for 15 mins. as soon as you get home & do something to make your place better. When you have done your 15 mins, reward yourself with your glass of wine. I am trying to do this & it really helps. Don't sit down first though or if you're like me you won't follow through! I can certainly relate to the fur & being tired - sometimes it just is overwhelming isn't it?
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Post by lulu1949 on Nov 26, 2008 12:23:53 GMT -5
I agree with Sheepish !!
Whatever you do, don't start off with your glass of wine. I have done this and NOTHING gets done !!! I also alternate 15 minutes of housework with 15 minutes of knitting mittens (I would rather knit than clean house !!).
Hang in there. You can do it !!!!
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