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Post by Morningstar on Dec 13, 2008 21:06:21 GMT -5
Hi all Currently I live on my own, but facing the possibility of needing to move into a shared living (roommate/flatmate) situation within the next few months. I'm interested to know of others' experiences who have lived (or are living) with people other than life partners, children or close family. How did you live with and deal with your squalor while living with and balancing the needs of others in the household? What about issues surrounding reduced personal space, roommates' lifestyle or habits, noise, lack of privacy and security, lack of storage or space for your personal belongings, and possibly reduced security of tenure? What about your children, others' children? Pets? How did you prepare yourself, family, pets, your belongings, current dwelling etc in order to move into such a situation? Thanks and looking forward to all your replies and wisdom   |
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Post by moggyfan on Dec 13, 2008 22:19:23 GMT -5
Hi Fuzzy
When I was younger (20s, early 30s), I lived with roommates in a variety of circumstances--as many as seven of us, as few as two, sometimes with pets, once with a child.
Surprisingly (or maybe not), I found it was much easier to maintain the house or apartment in reasonable condition when I lived with other people. It was not until I moved into a place on my own that I became really squalorous. When the living space was shared, I was much more motivated to be tidy and clean and clutter-free, though to be honest, I think the motive was largely fear of embarrassment.
Also, in a shared situation, it is harder to accumulate as much stuff because generally the only truly "private" space is your bedroom and what storage space there may be has to be shared.
As far as noise/privacy, etc., it works best when everyone's expectations are clear from the get-go (e.g., no music after 10 p.m., no pets in the bedroom, rotation of cleaning responsibilities, etc.). Also, it helps to have advance agreements about how certain expenses will be shared (e.g., will there be a shared cable/phone/DSL? will you share cost of some household supplies, like paper products, cleaning supplies? etc.) In my experience, most problems arose over relatively petty matters and could have been avoided if we roommates had agreed on such things in advance.
I enjoyed those years. It helps to be young and flexible. Now (in my 50s and pretty set in my ways), I think it would be more difficult. But I could do it if it were financially necessary.
Good luck!
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Post by phoebepj on Dec 13, 2008 22:52:50 GMT -5
when i briefly shared my apartment, i found it easy to keep things clean as the common areas stayed clean, we cleaned up after ourselves, etc... my bedroom was another story though. I could limit my squalor to my bedroom because i simply didnt have anything.
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Post by stressedbythemess on Dec 14, 2008 10:56:56 GMT -5
I've had the opposite experience, but i think it relies heavily on who you room with and how integrated your household is.
I live with two roommates who don't care about the house being clean, although I am the one who is more likely to leave "stuff" lying around. However, I will go after the scrubbing etc before I'll pick up, so I look like the messy on. (I'm slowly reversing this habit but it means my apartment is dirtier as I cannot keep up).
Previously I lived with one who was very cluttery, which made me angry when her stuff took over the entire common space.
I am actually hoping when I have my own place which will be soon, less people making mess, and more space, I will be able to keep up better.
But again- it really depends on who you room with. I have a cat and i just take care of her and they are there for out of town trips or emergencies or nights I get home too late to feed her. That part works very well.
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