packy
New Member
Joined: February 2009
Posts: 56
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Post by packy on Feb 10, 2009 17:33:00 GMT -5
Hi... I'm not sure this is the right place for me...
I need some help to get motivated to rid my house of piles of junk. I have old magazines dating 5+ yrs, tons of receipts (my husband thinks of my wallet as George Costanza's on Seinfeld), outdated clothes, boxes, just stuff that I can't seem to let go of. I have two young kids, so my house has to have some order, but there are piles everywhere. I can't even seem to let go of all their old clothes or toys.
I just feel so overwhelmed. I really want to get rid of stuff but I seem to carry a connection with so much of it. Friends have offered to come help but I need to sort through stuff myself. Probably to see what I need to keep, although 90% is probably stuff to throw out.
Lately, I have been planning on taking one area at a time but when it comes down to it, I always end up doing something else or use an excuse that I don't have enough time to finish.
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Post by autumn on Feb 10, 2009 18:19:54 GMT -5
Hi Packy! Welcome! I am new here myself, but I guarantee you have found the right place! You are in good company, and everyone here is very encouraging and motivating. I think you could really benefit from the 15 minute challenges they do here. (I have). It is all explained in the threads. There are tons of ideas and suggestions to help here. I would take some time to read the posts, they really can get you going!
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Post by notsomessyshell on Feb 10, 2009 19:26:51 GMT -5
Welcome Packy! I understand the getting overwhelmed thing. If I look at the "whole" of my house I get so upset and crawl back in my bed. I have to do little bits and just look at that. Then when I am done I enjoy the small clean spot! Even if it is just one small corner of a table. It is my one small clean spot! I did little bits until my entire table was cleared off. As for being attached to things, I have had to get tough with myself. Is this making me happy? Is this adding to my life in any way or is it actually causing me pain? I don't have to have the things to have the memories, you know. and kudos on starting your journey with us.
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Post by Ican on Feb 10, 2009 21:12:10 GMT -5
Hello & Welcome!
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Post by messymimi on Feb 10, 2009 21:22:10 GMT -5
Welcome, Packy !
Old magazines? Check. A never ending paper pile? Check. Stuff the kids have outgrown but is still around? Check. Feeling the need to go through it all for oneself? Check. Feeling so overwhelmed by the enormity of the task that it never gets started? Check.
Yep, you're in the right place!
There are as many ways to start as there are people, so I will mention only a few that might speak to you.
Begin with Eliminate the Evidence. That means making sure no one could follow your path around the house by the stuff you leave out. Someone just made a sandwich in here? Really? I'd never know, there aren't any dishes or crumbs or jars of mayo left out as evidence.
You could also start with Defend Your Territory. That means you clean up just one small place. A drawer, a section of counter, your nightstand. Then defend it with your life. It does not get recluttered, for any reason, by any one. Any person who puts something in that place that doesn't belong there gets called back to pick up the item (nicely, of course). Then expand the territory, square foot by square foot if necessary.
Then there is the Chat Challenge Method. This means coming to the chat room and talking for 15 minutes, then working for 15 minutes. This breaks the tasks that seem so overwhelming into little bites that you can actually take, and keeps it fun.
Another way to start is the Today Plus method. This is great if you have a huge backlog of work. You do all of today's dishes, plus a few from the backlog, every day until they are done. All of today's laundry, plus at least one item from the backlog, gets washed and put up today. This works with paper, too -- deal with all of today's receipts, mail, and other papers, today! plus at least one paper from the backlog. You can choose to do more than one from the backlog, but you have permission to do just one, since you are also not adding to it by taking care of today's items today.
I hope this gives you just a few ideas to begin with; read around, there are tons of others.
It's good to have you here.
messymimi
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Post by crazycatlady on Feb 10, 2009 21:37:29 GMT -5
Welcome, Packy. Stick around. The encouragement and pointers that you learn here can be life-changing. They made all the difference for me, and my family.
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packy
New Member
Joined: February 2009
Posts: 56
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Post by packy on Feb 11, 2009 10:04:53 GMT -5
Thank you to all who have replied to my first post. I will stick around and I'll keep reading what everyone has posted.
Is there a place on here that explains what Squalor is and what the stages are that some posts have mentioned? Also, this is my first time on this type of site. Do I need to download the chat software to go into a chat room?
Thanks for the encouragement!
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Post by eatingbonbons on Feb 11, 2009 14:14:36 GMT -5
Welcome, Packy! You've been given some great ideas already. That's how wonderfully encouraging it always is here at SoS.
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Post by skatters on Feb 11, 2009 15:14:53 GMT -5
Welcome Packy! I think you are in the right place. Some of us are hoarders, some of us are Messies... but we all benefit from being here! Here is a link to the old Squalor Survivors "Measuring Squalor" site: www.squalorsurvivors.com/squalor/measuring.shtmlAs far as chat goes, usually you don't have to download anything. It uses Java, but most browsers already have that installed. If not, I think it walks you through the small download. I hope that someone can answer that question a bit better! Again, Welcome!
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Post by creativechaos on Feb 13, 2009 2:19:21 GMT -5
what skatters said, packy, about the small download, if you don't already have java.
you fit right in here! ok; here's one i use to get things done when i am at a standstill due to demand resistance. use "structured procrastination". don't want to sort those papers? do the dishes? still don't wanna? clear a counter, wipe down the stove, etc. even if you clean "all around the issue" at least you will get stuff done! (this works better if you pick something to resist with a deadline, but not TOO crucial).
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Post by valor on Feb 15, 2009 22:55:32 GMT -5
Hi Packy, Pickles in her post above is so right, re: --George Costanza's wallet --shrinkage "Seinfeld"-what a great show-a classic! A warm welcome to you
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velvetedge
New Member
Joined: December 2008
Posts: 20
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Post by velvetedge on Feb 16, 2009 0:17:12 GMT -5
Packy,
Welcome. As a semi newb here myself, I read alot but I dont post much, I have found a TON of inspiration to get myself going on those "im gonna get to it" projects in the house. My advice to you is just get started. The main project that my husband and I are working on is cleaning out our front bedroom/storage/im gonna get to it/this doesnt really have a home, room. Its our room of doom. We've made INCREDIBLE progess in there but it hasnt been overnight. I has taken aLOT of time but we're coming on to the finish line soon and we can begin turning it into the office it will become. Im hoping that the room will be completed for my anniverary gift. But, this wasnt supposed to be about me. Welcome to the boards. Know that wherever you are in this, someone on here has been there , is there, or you are where someone is trying to get to as the next step on thier journey. Know that here you can talk about it without fear of judgement. We're all here for the same reasons.
Regards Tracy
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Post by 123jake on Feb 25, 2009 23:41:58 GMT -5
Hi *looking around to make sure no one I know saw me walk through the door* Ummm...this is my first post. I'm so embarassed by my problem. I can't let anyone in my place. Even when I start to get it under control, it promptly becomes a mess again. I'm sitting here with 11 stinky bags of garbage sitting beside me. I took the first step, gathered all the trash into bags and just left it there for days. Why can't I just take it out to the garbage like a normal person? I mean, it stinks!!! Why do I allow myself to live like this? Why can't I keep my place clean and tidy? What is my problem? ?!!!!!!!!! The dishes are so disgusting and I can't seem to do them before the food gets mouldy and dried on. One day, there was a rat in my place and I just lay in my bed cringing, listening to it eat the garbage and rotting food. My closest neighbour stumbled on my mess and called it a tip. She can't understand what my problem is either. I'm scared to look under my bed. Or my fridge. Or my stove. Or in my closet. Or in my oven. When I open my food cupboards, stuff comes falling out on my head. Same with the dish cupboards. Don't even ask about what's in my fridge. Nothing edible, that's for sure. I need help.
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Post by crazycatlady on Feb 26, 2009 21:17:43 GMT -5
How is it going, Packy?
Great work, VelvetEdge!
And welcome, 123Jake!
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