whitewitch
New Member
Joined: February 2009
Posts: 7
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Post by whitewitch on Feb 17, 2009 20:09:47 GMT -5
I didn't grow up like this. My mom always had the house clean, not crazy clean but comfy lived in clean. When I started high school things started deteriorating. We were living in an apartment that was supposed to be temporary but turned into a five year residence. My (former) step-father had some personal issues and changed radically. He didn't like us to clean, and would get paranoid and accusatory when we did. After I got my own place and they moved things improved considerably but I was never as neat as I wanted to be. Fast forward to about 5 years ago. I am married to a wonderful, understanding husband and I have one beautiful daughter and a stepson. We went through the worst year ever and nothing has been the same since. (house fire, four family deaths, con artist, unemployment etc.) Everytime we move we start with the best of intentions. I am embarassed to have people in my home. I know it could be worse, the kitchen is functional, the beds are functional, the kitty mess stays in the litter box. But there is stuff everywhere! Trash, toys, papers, misc junk. I can't focus on other areas of my life well. I forget things, I have a hard time making decisions, I lose things in this abyss of "stuff". My daughter has a library book that is several weeks overdue and I can't find it anywhere. I feel like everytime we get things good and cleaned it only lasts a day or two. The worst of it is the bugs. In our area they are everywhere anyway, the building had them when we moved in but I can't say we have done everything we could to get rid of them or avoid having them. It's so humiliating. It's a new year though and I want to turn this around once and for all. I want to start spring cleaning early and get back to where I was right after I had my daughter. I was amazed to find this community. I hope that I can be as successful as some of you.
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Feb 17, 2009 21:43:48 GMT -5
- a cyberhug to welcome you
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Post by skatters on Feb 17, 2009 21:54:20 GMT -5
whitewitch - it sounds like you are in the right place! I can relate to alot of what you have said...
Just jump right in here - we are glad to have you!
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Post by notsomessyshell on Feb 17, 2009 23:08:45 GMT -5
Welcome! And . Glad you are here. Look forward to hearing more from you.
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Post by lilith on Feb 18, 2009 1:12:48 GMT -5
Dearest,
First, I want to congratulate for living through those tragedies. I have been through some stuff myself and ultimately I will not apologize for how I had to live in order to survive. Yes, I hoarded and squalored but I didn't die when I really wanted to, so I salute you fellow survivor.
Now, down to now. Grab a bag. Walk around and put trash in bag. Repeat. Come to the board every day and try to post every day. Anything. Do listzilla and chat. They really do help. What kind of bugs do you have? Post about it. We have lots of expertise in that area.
Most of all, know that you are no longer alone. I won't lie-this is a long, hard road but we will help you along. The more you engage here, the clearer things will become to you. The key to this really is understanding and loving yourself. We will help. Welcome.
Love, Lilith
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Post by eatingbonbons on Feb 18, 2009 12:26:56 GMT -5
Welcome, whitewitch!
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Post by messymimi on Feb 18, 2009 14:54:01 GMT -5
Welcome, WhiteWitch !
Your house sounds almost exactly like mine! Functional kitchen and bathrooms, usable beds, a kitty "miss" is an aberration and cleaned right away. But still, the piles of junk, the mess, the hours spent looking for things -- ugh.
Your determination and persistence will get you through this.
It's good to have you here.
messymimi
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whitewitch
New Member
Joined: February 2009
Posts: 7
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Post by whitewitch on Feb 18, 2009 23:00:23 GMT -5
Dearest, First, I want to congratulate for living through those tragedies. I have been through some stuff myself and ultimately I will not apologize for how I had to live in order to survive. Yes, I hoarded and squalored but I didn't die when I really wanted to, so I salute you fellow survivor. Thank you so much for your replies! Especially Lilith your words really hit me. I'm just now in the last couple of months coming to terms with the fact that something in me really broke a few years ago. I'm taking pictures of every room tonight and tomorrow to post in the photo area and hopefully one day I will have after photos to add to them. I also watched a lot of BBC How Clean is Your House? today . Call it trying to scare myself straight The thought of my family and my kitty living in this hurts me. My husband says that the thought of ME living in this hurts him. Thank you all.
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Post by valor on Feb 19, 2009 9:01:44 GMT -5
Hi Whitewitch, Sorry to hear about the awful year you went through There are some wise people on here who have dealt with bugs and can give you good advice on products to use etc. An understanding husband and beautiful daughter are wonderful support and encouragement! And now you have this board too...Welcome
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Post by crazycatlady on Feb 21, 2009 12:24:03 GMT -5
Welcome, Whitewitch. Your description of your home rings a bell with me. It used to be impossible to clean up. Much of the home was usable, but there was so much stuff everywhere. It has totally amazed me to learn how much easier life is with less stuff.
Stick around. Keep posting. Joining this community of friends can make the difference for you, and your family.
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Post by Ican on Feb 22, 2009 2:29:38 GMT -5
Hello & Welcome!
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Post by creativechaos on Feb 27, 2009 3:39:38 GMT -5
welcome, whitewitch! i'm sorry for the tragedies you endured, and am glad you are here and have a caring husband. you will find so much support and love here.
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