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Post by messyjedi on Apr 23, 2009 10:19:31 GMT -5
What are some ways you have found to keep going?
I pretty much did nothing yesterday. Seriously. I fed and changed kids and that is it. I didn't get dressed. Didn't make my bed or do any laundry. And at the end of the day instead of feeling rested and refreshed for having taking a day off, I feel guilty. And mad at myself.
I started really working on my house at the beginning of the year. I have been here at SOS for maybe a month. My backlog of clean laundry is down to a couple of baskets instead of covering 2 couches. My kitchen is at a level that one good day of work could finish it completely. Beds are made probably 95% of the time. Floors are clear to walk across in the main areas of the house. These are huge improvements. But one day of doing not enough affects me more than these accomplishments. Why is that? And how do I overcome it?
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Post by breakingfree on Apr 23, 2009 11:40:55 GMT -5
I don't know how many children you have, but from experience I know that sometimes feeding and changing the kids is all one can get done in a day! Try not to be so hard on yourself. I know, easier said than done. I, too, feel guilty if I "take a day off." I also tend to feel guilty if I buy something frivolous (sp?) for myself. Like, I bought this cute funky designer purse that would have cost over $100 and got it for $35 and felt so guilty for buying it. SO said that I shouldn't feel guilty for doing something for myself because I rarely do but I always think about if there is a more "practical" way to have spent the money. Also, I get scared that if I take a "day off" from cleaning (like letting the dishes sit overnight or waiting on doing that laundry or not vacuuming) that it will be the start of my being squalorous again. I really don't believe I'll let that happen again but that fear is there and just won't go away.
Not sure if any of that helped you or not. I just wanted you to know that I identify with how you feel. One thing I do to motivate myself though is to say, "Something is better than nothing."
BF
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Post by Arid on Apr 23, 2009 12:08:43 GMT -5
Congratulations on the progress that you have made!
Nothing motivates me to clean the house like having company does! In fact, it is the ONLY time that I feel motivated to clean. I'm working at teaching myself to clean "just because." In the meantime, knowing that guests will be arriving helps me to get off my rear end.
Good luck.
Arid
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Post by AnnieOkie on Apr 23, 2009 14:03:06 GMT -5
Jedi-You are doing a great job! Please don't feel guilty.
I find it hard to stay motivated myself. Mostly after working all day and on the weekends, too. I know it has been said a million times.....but posting my To Do's in the Accountability Thread really keeps me focused. (I know you have used it too.) I'll be honest....some days, the ONLY reason something gets done is because I remember I posted it there and don't want to have to go back and post a "not done" beside it at the end of my day. Going back and posting "done/not done" really helps me. I wish I could stay motivated all on my own, but it this is what it takes for me, then so be it!
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Post by annieblue on Apr 23, 2009 14:13:35 GMT -5
Hi Jedi -  I also started earnestly working on my house at the beginning of this year. It is normal to have your ebbs & flows as your energy levels fluctuate. The important thing is to respect them rather than beating yourself up over them. Tell yourself you will be back to gung-ho when you are ready. Be gentle with yourself. I am in that slowed down phase right now too. I am working on ramping my mind back up to getting going again. It finally dawned on me that my most valuable motivation tool, learned solely from this community, is MOTIVATION FOLLOWS ACTION, rather than the other way around. It really can't be said too often around here, & thankfully it has finally sunk in with me. I am wishing that for you too!  ps: I am now shooting for Monday as my GET GOING AGAIN date. If you've not jumped back on the wagon before then, please do join me! 
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Post by Meme on Apr 23, 2009 22:28:00 GMT -5
being a mama is a full time job and sometimes we cannot do it all- and keeping them healthy and happy and loved on is almost more than one can do- one day you will have the time and the motivation- love kid-lets but they are energy drainers- hug yourself now and then :-) when Meme is not so tired maybe I will start a thread about the expectations put on mamas and also on women- maybe we can take some of those off our ourselves- how many men have a couch potato day and then go to bed feeling guilty- maybe some of our guys can help us out with the thread- later- on
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