I have just had an extremely big couple of days that were both challenging and very rewarding, and thought I would share the story with you guys, who would understand what I mean.
First, a bit of background. I am currently expecting our first born child in October. DH and I had a MC late last year. I have always been a bit messy, but after that loss last year things really went downhill very quickly. I can't say what zone, but 2-3 ish i would guess - it was bad enough that I was unhappy with it and didn't enjoy having ppl over, so that will give u an idea... Anyway, with this preg, one of my sisters said she would like to come and help me clean and get prepared for this baby, because she has young children herself and knew that it would be easier to welcome a child into our home if the home in question was clean to start with - it would be much harder to clean it after child's arrival. I said yes, as I have been 'mentally' ready to clean and de-clutter for a while, it is the motivation and plan of action that tend to desert me.
So, she organised another sister to come and help, and then told me last week they would be up on Sunday (the one just gone). I couldn't take any time off work, so I knew I could be with them on Sunday, but not on Monday. As I am sure you will understand, I felt like I had to clean up a little before they arrived, so I sorted out most of the paper jungle on Friday, and cleaned the bathroom and some of the kitchen on Saturday. (Not impeccably clean, just brought the dishes back up-to-date etc).
Sunday was a whirlwind!! Cupboards were emptied, and I just had to make the 'stay, donate, or chuck' decision on stuff as we pulled it out. We did it really quick, which was definitely better (kinda like a Band-Aid!!), and I was ruthless. There were a few things I wasn't sure of, so the girls put them aside, then forced me to make a decision on them half hour or so later, cos the longer they sat there, the more likely it was they would stay.
I was expecting this stage of things to have been really really traumatic, and I won't deny it was hard, but it was easier than I expected. Certainly I think it would have been much harder if I did it on my own, because my procrastination and all the emotional weight we give to our stuff would have held me back, but I was able to talk this out with the girls "so and so gave me this, I like it, but I will never use it, but it is very pretty", and they gave me the strength to admit I could let go of it, and gift it to someone else via the op shop (goodwill).
The lounge and living areas have heaps of inbuilt storage cupboards, all of which we got through and the girls then cleaned and restacked. I have so much free space in there now!! I was amazed by how much stuff I just chucked or donated and couldn't figure out why I had thought I had so much important stuff I wouldn't be able to get rid of, or why I had kept it in the first place, etc.
Having said that, there are some things i just Couldn't get rid of - like my stuffed toys - which they were trying to encourage me to let go of, and that was hard - I felt like "I have let go of so much, don't try to make me let go of the things i really want to keep", so by the end of Sunday I was certainly exhausted - both mentally and physically. (Mind you, I kept the toys
)
Exhausted or not, after they left, there were stil a couple of jobs to do - like putting away some washing, makng the bed, and restacking the tupperware cupboard in the kitchen. oh, that reminds me: when we were doing the kitchen, we just quickly hit a few of the worst cupboards such as the one containing all the appliances and the one containing the plasticware. I was ruthless with the plastic stuff, culled all the cheap stuff, anything without lids, any lids without bottoms etc. Rewashed everything that was left and restacked it nicely. The scary part of the kitchen was in the appliance cupboard. It is near the floor and door doesn't close properly. My sister found remnants of a dead bird !!! That was the most horrible moment of the day - I felt so ashamed, and wished that had been my discovery instead of hers!! I can't figure out how the cat even got it in there??? Very very strange - and if i had have realised it was there, I would certainly have cleaned it up immediately - that is one of the things that even at my worse I wouldn't have put up with. Anyway, that was definitely the most shaming moment of hte day, everything else was just clutter, pet hair, dust and mess - not anything gross like that.
So, Sunday night, even though really tired, I put away all the 'kept' plastic containers, the clean washing, and made the bed. I also made the effort to do the few dishes (even though it was just a few glasses, a plate, and not much else), and then climbed into bed. Now here was where things gots strange because, as some of you may have experienced, I was lying there in bed exhausted, and still wanted to get up and just do a couple more jobs!! However, I did go to sleep, cos if it was just me, I would have pushed on, but I have to think of bubs and went to sleep.
Got up and did morning dishes on Monday, and a few other little jobs so the girls came out and i was able to catch up with them before I went to work.
In a way, it was good to be at work that day, because I knew they were basically just cleaning, but part of my brain was still occupied with 'what are they doing, is it ok, are they getting rid of my stuff?" kind of thoughts. However, got home Monday night to find they had cleaned all the living areas etc and reorganised some of the furniture. I tlooks lovely, and clean, and they got a lot of the cobwebs on the high beams etc. They said they didn't get through as much as they wanted, because there are still a couple of rooms they didn't really get to, but the fact that all the living areas are clean is awesome. Now the challenge is for me to maintain the areas they have done, and slowly get into the other areas and get them up to the same standard. I have asked the girls to help me with 'routines', and in the two days since, have been doing pretty well. In fact, am going to go now and vacuum the main floors again even though they 'don't look too bad', because if I leave them another day, then I will leave them too long, if you know what i mean!!
Anyway, sorry to ramble on so much. I wanted to share this story so that if you are thinkgin of asking for or accepting help, you can consider it. Certainly it is not a magic pill, i can't think that things are now 'fixed' - I need to work to maintain and improve, and I need that to continue past the initial phase of excitement and instead make it a lifteime habit. And it wasn't all easy, but nor was it as hard as I thought. Now the real work begins, I guess!
