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Post by gifted on Jan 15, 2010 4:07:13 GMT -5
I am likely to be up all night, tunnelling from the front door to the cable outlet in the diagonally opposite corner of the living room. I have really spotty Internet service right now, and my cell phone serivce is bad also.
Hopefully, I wil finish the cleaning, and the cable will install these services for me, and I will be able to be more sociable.
So I guess step one is to just get downstairs, and start at the front door.
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Post by gifted on Jan 15, 2010 8:32:32 GMT -5
I think I just made things WORSE by trying to consolidate stuff from broken boxes into new boxes, but new boxes are bigger, and then had had time picking them up when I decided to move them into basement. It is 5:30 AM. I am going to sleep for an hour (I hope I can wake up again.) and hope I can think more clearly after some sleep.
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Post by MsHavisham on Jan 15, 2010 11:51:06 GMT -5
simplegifts, I've been checking back in on this thread regularly to see how you are doing.
I think I'm your squalor twin for today as I'm in similar straits today, waiting for a deliveryman and tradespeople. No great words of wisdom to impart, but just know I am thinking of you and rooting for you and we *will* get through this.
As illuminata wisely said of her favorite bible verse in another thread: "...."And it came to pass." It doesn't come to stay, it comes to pass. No matter how bad you feel while it's happening, it WILL end."
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Post by kiddledo on Jan 15, 2010 12:24:04 GMT -5
Well, Monday I had the cable guys, 2 of them. I had a week to prepare and went into total "not gonna do it" mode. Got up early that morning and made sure there was a clear path to the sites and a clean spot to kneel in should they have to. Then I forced myself to relax and just went about my day as they did their thing.
Some thoughts
I'm trying to learn that most of the time, life isn't about me. The cable guy did not come into my home and life to make a judgement on me or the house. Their job was to install the cable as quickly as possible.
I paid instulation fees....it wasn't done for free, I paid them. I made it so their life wasn't in danger and they didn't have to apply for hazzard pay, but they were still paid.
I could hear them as they worked and all I heard was professional conversation, whistling and humming...If he had any thoughts, he didn't share them with me nor did I ask.
They provided a professional service for me and I paid for a professional service
You both will do fine....we are not what other people think of us, if they are in fact even thinking of us...most of them are busy working their own lives...
I'm enjoying my cable without one bit of guilt!!
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Post by gifted on Jan 16, 2010 1:06:07 GMT -5
Well, I didn't have the place ready, but he was a trooper. He needed to do some work outside, and so I got more "wiggle room." I even decided to trash my couch, I called an ex-BF to help remove the couch. (But the cable guy was already working behind it when the ex showed up.)
Right now, I am sitting on a cat litter bucket, with laptop on a kitchen chair. But I am in a heated room, instead of my unheated windowless (meaning window sashes removed) attic, trying to grab a neighbors unsecured wire less signal. I called my son a bit earlier, and I did not need to stand in my yard freezing, and still have my call dropped a half-dozen times.
At one point, while he was working outdoors, my mind was running through all kinds of things to say about my place to him. I was tempted to reassure myself by asking,"I'm sure you have seen worse?" but I composed myself. I was a bit embarrassed when he was done, because his hat was covered in dusty cobwebs from the corner of the room.
But maybe that is why he wears a hat?
But just knowing that I am not alone in my struggles meant that I was able to go through with this, and have the services that I need to try to have a functional life.
Oh, and the ex-BF did not give me any nastiness, or try to do anything other than what I intended. While we were dating, he rarely came into my house. I kicked him out on his first visit, because he started burning papers in the romantic fire I had lit. He said that my house disturbed him too much for him to not do something about it. He did plenty outside of the house without my permission that angered me.
Oh yeah, he DID make one remark about a wooden armchair that needs repair. He said it would make good fire wood. I told him that I like the chair and haave always intended to fix it. And he did not argue!
OH, I also found current BF's CD collection, and was able to give it back to him, after it being buried for about six months. He couldn't resist commenting about my huge unused aquarium. After buying it, I never set it up, because I needed to figure out the logistics of maintaining the aquarium. I forget, but I think it is 100 gallons. It is five or six feet long.
So I think I can consider today as a success, even though I slept through I lot of it, and made some messes in other areas of the house. The removal of the couch gives me much needed maneuvering room. I think I will use it as a place to sort, fill and stack boxes, for now.
Thanks for the support!
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Post by illuminata on Jan 16, 2010 1:14:20 GMT -5
You know, I think this thread is just awesome. I love to see people let others into their home when it isn't perfect. I really do. I understand the loathing, the procrastinating, the embarrassment, the dread in the pit of the stomach...oh, trust me, I do. But then the moment is here, and then it is gone, and oh happy day...something good came of it! That's a big, big hurdle y'all just climbed over. And good on ya! Dancing bananas all around!  |
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Post by charis on Jan 16, 2010 16:25:02 GMT -5
I applaud simplegifts, mshavisham, and kiddledo. You stepped up and did what you needed to do.
During my squalory years I used to shamelessly flee the house with the kids and leave Mr. C to deal with inspections and repair people. If I had been forced to face them on my own, goodness knows how many things would have been left undone.
While I am at it, I applaud Mr.C too. I am going to make that guy some apple cobbler.
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Post by dailystruggle on Jan 16, 2010 21:00:52 GMT -5
I miss cable.  I admire your courage. I'm too embarrassed to let anyone into my home even with it being better than it was. Also, the room in which the cable would go into is currently a freezing temperature. Not a fan of cold. So WTG, for having the courage to let someone into the home when it's not perfect and for getting some work done. DS |
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Post by illuminata on Jan 16, 2010 21:38:06 GMT -5
During my squalory years I used to shamelessly flee the house with the kids and leave Mr. C to deal with inspections and repair people. If I had been forced to face them on my own, goodness knows how many things would have been left undone. I shamelessly flee the house now and leave Mr. Nada to deal with any people. I've even been known to hide in the bedroom or bathroom while he goes to the door.  |
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Post by gifted on Jan 17, 2010 15:35:11 GMT -5
During my squalory years I used to shamelessly flee the house with the kids and leave Mr. C to deal with inspections and repair people. If I had been forced to face them on my own, goodness knows how many things would have been left undone. I shamelessly flee the house now and leave Mr. Nada to deal with any people. I've even been known to hide in the bedroom or bathroom while he goes to the door. Yes, I have done this also. But then the servicemen never get in the house. My cat will only answer the door for pizza deliveries. |
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