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Post by xievajohnson on Jan 19, 2010 13:08:35 GMT -5
Just sharing... I just watched this interview with Dr. Charles Foster on couples dealing with clutter. I thought his initial quote was pretty good. He says clutter is up there with the big three (parenting, money, and sex) when it comes to couples fighting. He also says suggesting to the clutterer that s/he needs to start acting "like normal people" makes things worse. I thought it was interesting that he sort of presumes the clutterer is the guy. Not so in my relationship! Link to video: www.necn.com/Boston/Health/2010/01/18/Tips-for-cutting-through-chaos/1263825047.htmlLink to web article: www.chestnuthillinstitute.com/blog/187 |
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Post by Chris on Jan 19, 2010 13:34:21 GMT -5
I agree that the issue is up there with the big important things. It's interesting you brought up this topic today because yesterday I found my introduction post where I admitted that I had always thought my husbands clutter and hoarding was a big problem and that mine was very minor. When I joined here was at a time when I had finally realized I had serious disorganization, I kept too much stuff, and I over bought/acquired. It's just that my husbands stuff was more volume and so I had always hidden behind his. In our case, we've both made a lot of strides. I decided way back then in summer 2008 not to focus on his "stuff" at least until I got mine under control and I'm still working on my issues  . Interestingly though my husband gave me things to sell and he voluntarily let go of some things. He still has hoards of stuff but I don't let myself worry about his - cause like I said it would be like the pot calling the kettle black. I am very very glad that my husbands style of keeping things is pretty much contained -- he has boxes and drawers and closets but it doesn't affect the main living areas. It's a real serious concern as we grow older that we pare down things and not have an attic full and tons of excess because most likely we will find it harder in years to come to deal with heavy things. Anyway, it sure is an interesting topic. In our house we both keep too much stuff. Our son doesn't seem to have inherited any of our pack rat tendancies -- but he married someone who seems to keep a lot more stuff than he does. He loves to throw things away. |
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Post by puppybox on Jan 19, 2010 13:36:32 GMT -5
the article has a lot of useful solutions if you are a clutterer livign with a neat person.
thanks for linking it.
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Post by mythreecats on Jan 20, 2010 1:30:57 GMT -5
My mom is messy and cluttered, my dad is not, and I would guess that this causes 80% of the disagreements in their marriage. I would have trouble dating a neat person (well, perhaps I should say they would have trouble dating me!)
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