Transformingmylife commented about my remark about how desqualoring gives your life potential, and I wanted to share how true that is for me today:
The very first day at my "new/old" job, as I'm reconciling myself to failing at my previous job, my DH's mother died suddenly! He left for his hometown the next morning, and I'm on my way now.
Even though we're grieving, because I've desqualored, I was able to do the following, for the very first time:
I found 2 suitcases in the first place I looked, then 2 more for me last night. None of them had anything stinky inside.
I knew exactly where all our travel-sized toiletries were stored. I don't think DH took any of them, but I'm still glad they were available.
We had plenty of clean, matched socks and underwear, all without holes.
I had an extra set of keys for our neighbor.
I was able to alter the waist of DH's dress pants, so they fit better.
I located my checkbook on the first attempt, so I could pay the utility bills.
While I couldn't find DH's beloved backpack, I could find enough suitcases that I could insist that he "get over it." It's in a tote somewhere, and I'm not a bit sorry that a 53-year-old man isn't carrying a backpack. I think DH believes that I hid it deliberately, but it's pure serendipity.
I could package up the dogs' favorite toys, indicating which toys go with which dogs.
I had 2 clean pet carriers for the cats, and clean towels for the bottoms.
All the dogs' harnesses and leashes were exactly where I expected them to be. This is especially noteworthy, since DH has been walking them--we don't always agree on where to put things. All the harnesses were pretty clean.
The backyard is nearly free of dog poop, since I picked it up a couple of days ago.
When I took the pets to the vet's, and then the kennel, I wasn't embarrassed about car squalor.
I tidied the house within an hour: swept the floor, cleaned 2 bathrooms, did 2 loads of laundry, cleaned the litterbox, ran the dishwasher, and changed the bedsheets. I had a clean, folded set of sheets, right where I expected to find them. DH doesn't know that I tidied last night--it will be a surprise, and even if he doesn't notice, I'm glad that we aren't coming home to squalor.
If our neighbor or my mom has to come inside, I won't be ashamed.
Our house isn't entirely tidy, but all the areas we use are.
Not all has gone well. After taking DH to the airport, I nodded off while driving home, and ran the tire up on a curb, flattening it.
Could have been worse, though. Neither of us had slept, since DH had to prepare for the trip in a certain order, so he didn't pack until 2:30 am. Next time, I will insist that he pack first--I could have had a couple of hours' sleep that way. Hopefully, this incident will convince him that I'm better at strategizing than he is. I did have enough room in the garage to store the damaged tire, without having to shift anything.
I also missed my 6:00am flight today, but I'll still arrive in time for the funeral, with enough clean, suitable clothing and socks.
Finally, since I'd demoted, I was able to call my supervisor and tell him that I wouldn't be back for a week, and just walk away. If I were still a manager, I might not have been able to leave at all; if I had, I would have had to arrange for coverage, make contingency plans, etc, etc, etc.
I'm so glad we could respond more effectively.
