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Oh no
Jul 22, 2008 13:09:09 GMT -5
Post by suchamess on Jul 22, 2008 13:09:09 GMT -5
Our a/c went out and I had to call a repairman. Normally, they check the outside unit, fill it with freon and go on their merry way. This guy came in the house. I had the living room perfect, but he went into my kitchen and other rooms to check the vents. I was in panic. He asked to see the return vent. I would not let him. It's in our bedroom, which is a major level 3. I'm talking clothes up to the bed, etc. I told him someone was sleeping in there Good Lord. I was so embarrassed. My kitchen floor was messy and the cat just HAD to drop the stinkiest load ever right before he walked in. Our wallpaper is torn and ther eare boxes in there from my previous cleaning sessions. I lied and said "We are in the process of remodeling, please excuse the mess. How many times do you guys lie to cover up reasons for a mess or to keep people out of your house/certain areas of the house?? I'm so ready to drop the lying and have a clean home that can be walked through and through. *sigh* Don't know when that will happen, but I'm sure trying my hardest.
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Jul 22, 2008 15:49:24 GMT -5
Post by messymimi on Jul 22, 2008 15:49:24 GMT -5
Dear suchamess,
Your story is very similar to mine. Problem is, I have to let people in all of the time.
Our house is both a mess and a money pit. We have had repair people tramping in and out for months, and still have a couple of things to be done.
It is indeed discouraging to have to tell the new people who come around that I can't do much until this or that is repaired, which is true in so far as it goes. But it is also true that I could do more.
At least so far no one has reported us to CPS or the health department.
Just today a new friend wanted to come over and see the kittens. I told her she was welcome, but warned her that the house is a wreck because I am a lousy housekeeper. She laughed, came, and did not seem too shocked.
I dream of the day that I don't have to explain my house. Meanwhile, friends are in and out all of the time, my extended family has come to expect it to be this way, and the only room I feel like I can't let anyone in is Little Girl's (at age 10 she is worse than Number One Son, the 17 year old). I will tackle it next time she is visiting grandparents.
The pastor of our church dropped by one day, and I let him in. He said nothing about the boxes and such at the time. The next Sunday, he worked into the sermon a line about how God doesn't judge us by our housekeeping. It made me feel better in one sense, but I still want a clean house.
I wonder how long I need to want it before I will do something more about it, because what I am doing doesn't seem to work.
You also have my sympathy about the a/c. We went without for over 3 months while trying to figure out how to do other repairs.
Maybe we can make a pact to keep trying.
messymimi
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Jul 22, 2008 19:27:13 GMT -5
Post by anonymoose on Jul 22, 2008 19:27:13 GMT -5
"God doesn't judge us by our housekeeping"
I like that. And I hope not, because I'm such a disaster everywhere else, I'd hate for THIS to be the bow on my handbasket, you know?
I lie to not let people in - now that I'm making more of an effort to catch up with old friends, etc, my "go-to" excuse has been, "Oh, I'm gutting the place right now. Down to the walls. I even took the furniture to storage so it would be out of the way, so I'm sitting on the floor right now - you really don't want to come over."
Technically, even if the place were spotless, I really don't have any usable furniture. And I do need to gut the place, so with the exception of the fact that I haven't gotten off my flubber to DO anything about it yet, it's not really a lie.
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Jul 22, 2008 19:50:24 GMT -5
Post by Carrie on Jul 22, 2008 19:50:24 GMT -5
Suchamess - I know how you feel! I recently had Comcast come to install phone service and it was a major trauma for me! No one could tell me WHERE in the house they would have to go to complete the installation. One person told me they'd just go in the cellar, another told me it would be wherever the "signal" was best, another told me it would be wherever I have my current phone lines............which included the bedroom! There was NO WAY I was letting them in there, so I was prepared to do exactly as you did and tell them that there was someone sleeping in there! Fortunately they only ended up having to go in the living room. However, my living room was in rough shape as it was ......... and I was mortified! I had thrown the pile of stuff next to the computer table (where the phone connection is) into boxes and stashed them in the kitchen so they could reach the phone connection. But the rest of the room was terribly messy/cluttered/needed vacuuming BADLY. I think I mumbled something about "don't mind the mess" when they came in. The whole time they were here, I felt on edge and nervous and ashamed and WISHING THEY WOULD GET DONE! I was so relieved when they finished and left. Since then I've been trying to get my bedroom in shape, and when I'm done with that I'll do the living room. I too want so badly to have a house where someone can come in on a moment's notice and I won't have to feel rotten about it. I want dd to be able to have her friends over here. I want to start dating at some point, and may want to have a date pick me up and not have to bar him at the door. So, you're not alone! Let's work on this together and help each other reach the goal of having a home that ppl can come in to!!! Carrie
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Jul 22, 2008 20:05:11 GMT -5
Post by creativechaos on Jul 22, 2008 20:05:11 GMT -5
hee hee; I can relate to the humor in this and the pain of it too. I've used plenty of excuses to not let people in to the apt. In fact, I am so used to not letting people in that they don't try to come anymore. but it must be really hard not to have an AC. so what will you do about it, suchamess? You need that AC! I know that panicky feeling of impending apt. inspections; those happen to us a lot here, and who they pick to inspect is random. They only need to give 48 hrs. notice. Still, I'm at a high level 2 in every room but the bathroom, which is low level 2. I too am sick of living this way, but I keep repeating the same behaviors that make it hard to make lasting changes. I schlepp so much in and out of here it's not uncommon for some passerby to ask me if I am moving. I bow to all of you with children and husbands; I don't know how you do it! One of me is like a room full of kindergarteners; it takes me less than 5 minutes to mess up the apt. completely. the way I see it, my 2 worst self-sabotaging habits are: not putting stuff away when I take it out, and acquiring as fast as I release stuff; maybe faster. But here we are all wanting to change and that is a comfort; and we celebrate each other's victories in this group, however small. Sending you lots of hugs, suchamess. the fact that there were boxes from your previous cleaning sessoins is cause for celebration! Hope you get your AC back really soon!
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Jul 22, 2008 20:09:45 GMT -5
Post by comingclean on Jul 22, 2008 20:09:45 GMT -5
suchamess -- i feel your pain..... oh do i feel it. The one time the HVAC repairman came dh let him into our bedroom (only room with attic access) to fix the heat -- the room was HORRIBLE. We were not expecting him that day -- he never called to schedule the appt. he just showed up. Now the AC is out so i called the same guy.... 4 weeks ago. And i didn't clean...... i need to though, BADLY. My bedroom is still as bad as it was in the photos i posted. So yesterday i got annoyed... i mean geez, it was FOUR weeks ago and it's HOT here. So i left a message, and then called back today to schedule an appt. They scheduled me for "sometime" on Friday....... so i've got to get the upstairs presentable by then. But tomorrow and thursday i have an appointment and 2 interviews...... AGhghghghghgh.... Moral of the story for me -- i should have been cleaning ALL along and NOT waiting till the last minute I'm right here with ya..... and i'm hoping to be in cool air soon with ya too
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Jul 22, 2008 21:00:23 GMT -5
Post by SueDonym on Jul 22, 2008 21:00:23 GMT -5
When I had a plumber in for the first time, when I was only partially into my desqualoring, I explained to him what was going on, and why I had let the leak go on so long (said I'd been in a depression since my mom passed, etc). I said I'd rather someone know I was "a little bit crazy than a lot stupid!" He got a laugh out of it, and said, "Believe me, I have seen much worse!"
Now please don't anyone take offense at my statement. It was just my way of cutting the tension for myself.
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Jul 22, 2008 21:40:46 GMT -5
Post by threeg on Jul 22, 2008 21:40:46 GMT -5
I feel your pain. I remember having to let the police into my old house after someone stole my stereo system and color tv. I was SOOOO mortified! It was a high level 3 in some rooms. I hope that you get your AC as soon as possible. I'm sending you good AC vibes. 3g
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Jul 22, 2008 21:43:15 GMT -5
Post by SueDonym on Jul 22, 2008 21:43:15 GMT -5
I feel your pain. I remember having to let the police into my old house after someone stole my stereo system and color tv. I was SOOOO mortified! It was a high level 3 in some rooms. I hope that you get your AC as soon as possible. I'm sending you good AC vibes. 3g Exact same thing happened to me!
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Jul 23, 2008 0:47:36 GMT -5
Post by suchamess on Jul 23, 2008 0:47:36 GMT -5
Thanks for the stories It's nice to know I'm not the only one who cringes over those two simple words "come over" The a/c is fixed, thank GOD. Now I have a new problem. An inlaw called today and is coming to our house on Saturday oh my. It's a bit overwhelming, but I'm going to do the main areas (my bathroom is going to take a full day, if not 2) and just shut the door to my bedroom. I keep putting that room off, I need to get to it. It is a hazard in every way. I'm feeling somewhat overwhelmed now. I had set a goal of having the place clean by the time school starts, now I have an even shorter deadline. I know we can all do this together..let's get out of the vicious cycle of fear and embarrassment
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Jul 23, 2008 22:03:15 GMT -5
Post by suchamess on Jul 23, 2008 22:03:15 GMT -5
....... I can't do it. No way can I get this place pulled together before the weekend. No way I'm seriously considering just taking the company out to dinner.
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Jul 24, 2008 2:23:06 GMT -5
Post by CrimsonKat on Jul 24, 2008 2:23:06 GMT -5
One of the areas we have not worked on yet is what we call The Cube. It's a cubelike stack of boxes that's in our dining nook (instead of any dining furniture). They are boxes that we still have to go through that we brought here from a storage unit we cleaned out 2 years ago (!). When workmen or whatever have to come in, I always say very casually, "Oh sorry about the mess. We JUST cleaned out our storage unit." Um. Yeah. JUST.
We have been working steadily on the rest of the apartment, so I don't feel too horrible about using an excuse, but it will sure be nice when I no longer feel embarrassed and feel like I have to justify why The Cube is there.
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Jul 24, 2008 10:41:33 GMT -5
Post by Carrie on Jul 24, 2008 10:41:33 GMT -5
Hey Such - I don't think there's anything wrong with taking your company out to dinner, if you can afford it. If there's no way you can get the place presentable in time, it might the best idea. BUT - if you do that, see if you can still "pretend" that you'll soon be having company again so you'll keep going on the progress you've made so far. Backsliding can be so demoralizing! I hope it goes well, keep us posted!
Carrie
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