zeeky
New Member
Joined: August 2008
Posts: 38
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Post by zeeky on Sept 12, 2008 21:06:13 GMT -5
I can't get past the "getting dressed to the shoes" part. I hate shoes. I find them barbaric. The very last thing I do before going out the door in the morning is put shoes on ... & the very first thing I do when I come in the door is take them off.
When it's warm out, I often just put them in my bag, & go barefoot.
From what I gather, she's adamant that you have to put shoes on first thing in the morning & keep them on all day in order to have a clean house. If that's the case, I'd rather live in filth.
Does anybody know of a barefoot-friendly website that offers the same sort of advice?
I'm serious.
love,
zeeky
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Post by tiredofthis on Sept 12, 2008 21:14:30 GMT -5
I was just thinking that I'd love to find another site like this one, because Flylady is a little bit to *** perky for my tastes. Although, there are flylady groups for your own state. I joined mine, and although it's not as active as this forum, people did welcome me immediately when I posted.
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Post by brenda on Sept 12, 2008 21:18:09 GMT -5
Take what you need and leave the rest. I did her program when I needed it and I ignored the shoe thing, my house still got clean.
Brenda
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zeeky
New Member
Joined: August 2008
Posts: 38
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Post by zeeky on Sept 12, 2008 21:21:38 GMT -5
bah. she's a shoe-nazi.
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zeeky
New Member
Joined: August 2008
Posts: 38
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Post by zeeky on Sept 12, 2008 21:27:03 GMT -5
May I tell you how f***ing awesome you are??
I had a rough day. I sincerely needed to laugh. You rock.
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zeeky
New Member
Joined: August 2008
Posts: 38
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Post by zeeky on Sept 12, 2008 21:31:25 GMT -5
don't worry, I assume we're all adults here.
my mouth is even dirtier than my kitchen, so it certainly doesn't bother me ...
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Post by fluffychild on Sept 12, 2008 22:21:46 GMT -5
I feel that fly lady's group is more advanced that what we are. I feel that they have all their clutter gone, and are just doing maintenance. As for the 27 fling -- I never liked that because I felt that she wanted you to run around your house as fast as you could and just toss and toss. If you have a cluttered house, you have to be careful how fast that you move so that you do not fall over anything. I usually put my shoes on within an hour after getting up and they are on me, normally until I know that I am in my house for the night.
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Post by pegasus48 on Sept 12, 2008 22:25:06 GMT -5
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Post by metamorpha on Sept 12, 2008 22:29:04 GMT -5
Flylady drives me nuts with her absolutes. You must do this. You must do that. I couldn't handle it because you know there's plenty people should do that she skips.
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Post by mouse on Sept 12, 2008 22:29:47 GMT -5
With FlyLady, as with everything else, YMMV (Your Mileage May Vary). I find her great for maintenance, but not for serious de-squaloring. I also dislike her "God breezes": the name makes me twitch, because I am quite sure that our religions are not the same, and it annoys me that she assumes that they are. I also find her "no whining" rule condescending. 1) It's my home and I'll whine if I want to. (Demand resistance, anyone? 2) Her definition of whining is not the same as mine. If someone says to me: "I can't do it that way because I have a disability/other valid reason, that doesn't constitute whining in my books. All right, that's enough ranting for now from Mouse. ~Mouse
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nonimouse
New Member
Joined: July 2008
Posts: 41
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Post by nonimouse on Sept 12, 2008 22:37:24 GMT -5
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Post by DJ on Sept 12, 2008 22:50:03 GMT -5
conceptually flylady rules. exposure gives me cavities with the sweetness. i know personally some people who are that sweet and i can handle it because i know them and love them. some stranger weeping soft purple clouds or whatever kindof freaks me out. and the only time the claws come out is when she encounters someone who's depressed and says anything about it and they are promptly shredded by her like she's freddie krueger- wtf.
on another note, i love shoes when i have to leave my home and own many many shoes, they are pretty at home i want to be barefoot. it's cleaner, more comfortable blahblah...
i figure that's why god made tabi socks and slippers though. i don't want -anyone- wearing shoes in my home and as far as i'm concerned flylady's sort of a cultural snob if she can't grok that it's a sign of disrespect to me for anyone let alone myself to wear shoes in my home. is icki. i understand not everyone was brainwashed into that as a cultural thing. but i was. and it's a personal thing with how i roll.
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Post by brenda on Sept 13, 2008 0:15:49 GMT -5
I think sometimes us messies resist being told what to do. Being willing to do things that are not MY way was a big part in my recovery. I was sure MY way was always right even when I wore one black and one blue shoe to work because they were the same shoe and the only ones I could find.
We have to be willing to do what we don't want to and to take information from sources that may not be ideally suited for us and learn to modify instead of seeing a program as a magical formula that only works when followed to the T.
Brenda
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Post by DJ on Sept 13, 2008 1:03:15 GMT -5
for me it really is a cultural thing- growing up in the states my family all lived on farms and no one would wear outdoor shoes indoors. there was a space, and a bench.. you took off shoes, and put on slippers when you came inside... it would have been amazingly rude to go through the dirt roads, gravel driveways then walk inside in those same shoes... some, few visitors, would wear their shoes inside because they'd come straight to the front door up the paved walkway, but still, usually they were use to taking their shoes off inside... my neighbors were hawaiian. and then i dated a boy from hawaii for 5 years who had a large portion of asian and especially japanese family members.. it's so culturally ingrained to remove shoes when entering the home that even in schools children to this day will remove their outdoor shoes and put on what you might call slippers. it's a very much ingrained cultural thing and it would have been extremely disrespectful to wear my dirty outdoor shoes indoors.. there were frequently baskets of clean, and in various sizes indoor slippers by the front door for guests to wear to prevent chilly feet or feeling exposed having your feet showing since some people don't like that.. again, there was always an area by the door to sit down, remove shoes, and a basket for them and area underneath the bench for them to go... i do wear shoes, of sorts inside, like i said, tabi socks.. other types of soft indoor shoes.. and i have a pair of converse that i wear only indoor but anything hoard soled is also hard on the bamboo mats in my home... so it's fairly destructive to the flooring.. and highheels which i personally love for outdoor wear will just crack the mats. ..:/ uhg
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Post by Rennie Ellen on Sept 13, 2008 3:37:44 GMT -5
Zeeky,
This whole thread has made me laugh!!!!!!
I tried Flylady before I came to the SS Board. I hated it for several reasons. First, there was the 50 gazillion hourly emails they'd send me telling me it was time to do this, or clean that, or time for the 27 fling boogie! After two days, I got OFF their mailing list. I had to declutter my computer files because it was actually slowing my then-old computer down! (Windows 95!!) I was ready to tell Ms. Flylady where to fling her boogie!
Then I found a Flylady group in my city and started attending the meetings. I felt like a fish out of water immediately for several reasons. I was the ONLY single mom there -- I was the ONLY one who had less than two kids -- I was the ONLY one who wasn't well off financially (I picked that up from their conversation....where they were going for the weekend, etc., while I was wondering how I could make up for the gas I burned up driving across town) -- the meetings were more of a social networking thing for homeschooling (my daughter went to a public school ) and sharing recipes and chatting....which I understand because everyone needs a break from cleaning, but there was no practical support for anyone who needed help -- and everyone acted like after THEY discovered Flylady, they didn't have a problem with clutter anymore and if you still did, you're not following the program wholeheartedly.
What made me leave the group forever was their email group. One woman made a snide remark questioning my parenting skills (remember, I was the ONLY single mom), which went out to the entire email group. I shot off an email to the group blasting this woman's judgmental attitude toward me and telling them if they're so perfect, feel free to throw some stones at me! Then the email group leader sent me a private email chewing ME out for criticizing this woman in front of the group! I replied to her that if this woman was going to criticize my parenting skills openly to the entire email group, I had a right to respond openly to the group and defend myself. But she didn't agree with me, so I emailed the group explaining the entire situation. Then I told them I thought they were a bunch of judgmental holier than thous and wanted nothing more to do with them and their group! I felt like I decluttered my life, getting rid of critical, non-supportive people -- and then I found SS!!! It was like I made room for y'all by getting away from this group.
I also found Flylady's routine rather rigid -- there's no room for flexibility. With my disabilities, I need flexibility in case I'm having a bad day and I'm not up to scrubbing my bathtub. Considering all the emails they sent me, everything they wanted me to do in one day was just impossible for me to do in one day! One or two weeks, sure, but NOT one day. Flylady would probably consider this "whining", but if she'd trade places with me for one hour and live with the chronic pain and fatigue I do, she wouldn't be so *** perky and would become more flexible with her program.
As for the shoes....I'm from Arkansas originally and going barefoot is just a way of life. Unfortunately, I've had several accidents in the past cleaning DD's messy room and unpacking from my move two years ago that resulted in broken toes and bruised feet. So for safety's sake, I do wear shoes when I walk around the house -- but they're soft, warm, comfy house slippers with non-skid bottoms! When I'm seated, I take them off and my Southern tootsies enjoy their freedom.
So while Flylady might work for other people, it didn't work for me and I personally wouldn't recommend her program to anyone.
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