c0mm0n
New Member
Joined: August 2012
Posts: 52
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Post by c0mm0n on Aug 7, 2012 10:35:57 GMT -5
"It's hard to throw away the kids toys knowing how much I paid $20 here, $8 there."
For some folks, like me, it's a waste to throw things away. Things were tight when I was a kid so we had to make every dollar go far. The same with SO - they had little and nothing was tossed.
I might do a garage sale if I can get enough of it together to sell. Until now everything has been going to goodwill.
Learning to toss broken items that I'll never fix, that has been really trying.
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Post by maggie on Aug 7, 2012 11:59:09 GMT -5
I forget where I first read this, but another thing to think about regarding "waste". A hundred years ago, one reason you had to save and reuse things was that there weren't replacements available. Not just that it would cost money -- there simply was not the market that we have today. Now, think of what you can get just by going to a dollar store or a thrift store.
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Post by Di on Aug 7, 2012 12:46:09 GMT -5
Toys are a tool to help your child learn and develop. Toys that are broken or incomplete only frustrate a child. Don't set your child up for failure by hanging onto toys that are no longer complete or appropriate for the current stage of development. Investing in a child is an ongoing thing just invest wisely and don't buy into the advertising maelstrom that tries to convince your child that he/she needs the latest plastic junk. If you ONLY buy high quality investment toys there is less volume to clean up and you will be mote motivated to keep them organized and complete. Even looking back 30 years if a toy cost less than $50-$75 I considered it a whim and tossable. I had to scrimp all my life so I did without until I could get exactly what I needed and then I was motivate to care for it. My grandchildren are now playing with the items I purchased for my kids. Unit blocks are a great investment. They teach math (counting, fractions, balance, geometry, physics) and they are fun to build with. American Girl Dolls teach history (the historical dolls. Not the GOT's) My daughter's are over 25 years old. Were played with constantly and still look like new. Basically I don't think kids need $8 - $10 plastic crap. All that stuff does is fill up your house and cause clutter.
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Post by scribbliz on Aug 8, 2012 2:08:52 GMT -5
babz, I got lucky when it comes to the kids department  my first was a girl and then my twins were girls. I would still be holding onto their stuff but I have a friend who had a baby girl almost two years after my twins. I went through their stuff, and passed it on to her; and I still periodically go through and if it doesn't fit and isn't torn it goes to her. The deal is, if she doesn't want it, like it, or need it, or it doesn't fit her daughter, she has full freedom to throw out or donate it. It works great for me, because I box things up for donations but they never make it; but I tell you, if i didn't have a friend who had a girl, I would still have all those clothes in a box (or twelve!) in my storage room...and my storage room isn't that big! |
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Post by angela on Sept 6, 2014 0:29:39 GMT -5
This is a very interesting topic! (And after writing two pages about it - I see that it is a real hot button for me!) From that little experiment, I learned that : 1.) NOTHING is irreplaceable. ANYTHING can eventually be found on eBay. Or somewhere, if you are patient and persistent. 2.) No matter what the appraised value of an item, it is only worth as much as someone is willing to pay for it on any given day. I have china that is appraised at a ridiculous price per piece - but the best price I can elicit from a buyer - is really all it's worth. 3.) The ONLY real value of most things is if they are beautiful, useful, enjoyable or meaningful TO YOU, RIGHT NOW. 4.) No matter how beautiful or special something is to you, if you look long enough, you will find something you like better. There's never an end to it. At some point, you have to just say, "This is good enough. I choose to be satisfied with THIS ONE." 5.) FUNCTION IS REALLY ALL THAT MATTERS. Having things that are beautiful to you, that express exactly who you are, that make just the right "statement" about you - that's all over-rated. If your dishes hold your food, if you clothes keep you warm, cool, comfortable, if your shoes protect your feet, if your chair and bed are comfortable, and your cook stove serves your purposes - all the other stuff doesn't matter. Having just the right one that suits your taste is a trap. 4.) NOTHING is forever. Stuff comes and goes, is created and destroyed, passes on from us to - eventually - strangers. Every antique store is full of things that were probably once cherished by someone. It's the natural order of "things." 5.) Things should be kept only as long as they are useful or meaningful to YOU. When they cease to be, pass them along to someone else who can use them. (Battered women's shelters are full of women and children who need what you have.) 6.) And most importantly, I learned that you can't change someone else's opinion of you by owning stuff just as nice as theirs. Nor will owning identical stuff teach them a lesson, and it is not even good revenge, because if you don't love it, it's just clutter, and you probably can't even get your money back out of it. Reread this thread, so much wisdom here, thought it needed a bump. |
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Post by Di on Sept 6, 2014 0:57:28 GMT -5
I found yet more stuff tucked back. I was going to upcycle it and "double" it's value. I had "words" with Self and suggested that she review THIRD GRADE MATH. 2x0=0. So doubling it's worth is ridiculous when it's basically worth nothing. The items went out. Hope they are having fun released to the wild
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Post by dayeanu on Sept 6, 2014 16:51:43 GMT -5
This is a very interesting topic! (And after writing two pages about it - I see that it is a real hot button for me!) From that little experiment, I learned that : 1.) NOTHING is irreplaceable. ANYTHING can eventually be found on eBay. Or somewhere, if you are patient and persistent. 2.) No matter what the appraised value of an item, it is only worth as much as someone is willing to pay for it on any given day. I have china that is appraised at a ridiculous price per piece - but the best price I can elicit from a buyer - is really all it's worth. 3.) The ONLY real value of most things is if they are beautiful, useful, enjoyable or meaningful TO YOU, RIGHT NOW. 4.) No matter how beautiful or special something is to you, if you look long enough, you will find something you like better. There's never an end to it. At some point, you have to just say, "This is good enough. I choose to be satisfied with THIS ONE." 5.) FUNCTION IS REALLY ALL THAT MATTERS. Having things that are beautiful to you, that express exactly who you are, that make just the right "statement" about you - that's all over-rated. If your dishes hold your food, if you clothes keep you warm, cool, comfortable, if your shoes protect your feet, if your chair and bed are comfortable, and your cook stove serves your purposes - all the other stuff doesn't matter. Having just the right one that suits your taste is a trap. 6.) NOTHING is forever. Stuff comes and goes, is created and destroyed, passes on from us to - eventually - strangers. Every antique store is full of things that were probably once cherished by someone. It's the natural order of "things." 7.) Things should be kept only as long as they are useful or meaningful to YOU. When they cease to be, pass them along to someone else who can use them. (Battered women's shelters are full of women and children who need what you have.) 8.) And most importantly, I learned that you can't change someone else's opinion of you by owning stuff just as nice as theirs. Nor will owning identical stuff teach them a lesson, and it is not even good revenge, because if you don't love it, it's just clutter, and you probably can't even get your money back out of it. Reread this thread, so much wisdom here, thought it needed a bump. Thank you for bumping this! Boy did I need to read it today! (Apparently "insights" and lessons learned don't stick with me for long - I can't believe I once wrote all that!) #4 was VERY needed for me today! I found some dishes for sale that I really like ......... |
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Post by LauraLotsaStuff on Sept 6, 2014 22:01:10 GMT -5
Sometimes its very easy to KNOW the right thing to do...but actually DOING it is much harder. I know that I could go to another person's house and help them clear out clutter, hoards, and clean up squalor. I KNOW I would be great at this. But when it comes to looking at your own stuff, it's just different. We must deal with sentimental attachment, supposed "value", and potential "need". Even though I have been able to start throwing away so many things, there are other things I simply cannot touch. But I am making great strides. I have been able to throw away PGTs. Perfectly good things. I threw away clothes that my kids had outgrown. Nothing wrong with them, just too small. Out of style, and things of so little value, for example, a plain t-shirt? Athletic shorts? NOT really losing anything. There are many many good clothes I'm putting into donate bags. Modern, trendy stuff (kids grow fast) that are in like new condition. Some very good brands. I had to struggle over the urge to sell, auction, or even take them to the consignment shop. But common sense won. I do not have the time or the space to hold onto these things for the "potential" use or value. I have made that progress with clothing, but not everything else. Getting there with the jewelry. Lordy, I should put a photo here of the amount of jewelry I have. I was able to throw out several things. It was junk jewelry, not talking real metals/stones, or vintage pieces, just cheap costume jewelry. If I only paid $15 for it new, what's it worth used? I got rid of all the broken stuff which I will never repair, except of course the REAL gold etc. and a necklace that is broken but belonged to my birth mother who passed away over 20 yrs ago. I am keeping that. I keep so much JUST IN CASE I need it. MY kids are being surprised by me lately throwing away unbroken things. Heck, it used to be I didn't even throw away broken things. If I can replace it for little $, not keeping it. I am thinking about some points brought up on this thread, for example, hoarders vs. squalor, and what parents did etc. Looking at the history of the family I was raised with, my mother is a clean freak. Spotless place, always. Always does dishes immediately after cooking. Always puts away clothes as soon as dryer is done, etc. But she has an extra clothes rack in the garage, and its full. She has clothes in her closet that she never wears. When she moved back here 3 years ago, I helped her unpack. I kept asking, mom, do you really need 6 cookie sheets? 3 strainers? 5 frying pans? 2 coffee makers? 10 spatulas? She seemed to have a minimum of 2 of everything. She has at least 10 full sets of table settings, as in place-mats, napkins, tablecloth. 1 set for every holiday, every season, etc. She has complete sets of decorations for every holiday as well. I'm amazed by it. They all look brand new, of course. My mom can't even watch a half hour TV show, as she is always up cleaning something. Her pantry is SO FULL of food its stacked on each other. I don't know why 3 people would ever need that much. Sometimes she gives me loads of food, saying "we'll never eat all this". Duh. I now know to check the dates carefully, she has given me things that expired 2 years or more. I take it, but throw most of it out. She just buys things on sale because its a good deal. So, that's my mom. I hate cleaning. My grandmother, her mom, went through the depression. She kept lots of things. She stocked up. Her home was somewhat cluttered, but again very clean. VERY. Cleanliness and proper manners were required. When she passed, my mom and aunt spent weeks there going through the house. It was a lot of good things, old China, old furniture, jewelry, knick-knacks, and lots of clothes. Good but just way too much for 1 person. Every closet was full of women's clothes. 3 bedrooms. Also an added on family room with wardrobes, full of brand new clothes. Many many of her clothes had tags on them, Macy's, and like that, good stuff, no K-mart here. Well, I didn't mean to write so much. But I know a lot of us struggle with this as I do. It is 1 of the main reasons I think we keep things. Potential value. So, summary: 1. sentimental value. 2. potential value. 3. potential use. 4. indecision--just not sure if it has 1, 2, or 3...so I'd better keep it just in case!  |
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Post by angela on Sept 8, 2014 20:10:01 GMT -5
LauraLotsaStuff thanks for your musings. It is such an interesting and emotionally charged subject for us...stuff. All the mental baggage that goes along with every little doggone thing..
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Post by lostchild on Sept 11, 2014 8:41:26 GMT -5
I don't value me stuff for cash...I value what would I save in a fire? I won't save stained clothes although I will save one top from Panama my stepfather gave me from one of last trips before he died. It has Panama on it. I will save 2 never worn autographed t shirts from funny comic convention. I won't save everyday junk. I don't save all coins but did save 1900 Indiana head penny and a real buffalo nickel. My saving stuff is only stuff I can not obtain anymore.
If I have doubts I look up values and probability of replacing an item.
It keeps me sane. I can toss old appliances easily because every year the new ones come out with better features. I can toss stuff I will not clean. I am thinking about having glasses appraised...they are silver lined with actual gold. I won't sell them though unless absolutely necessary because I bought in 2000 to celebrate. I drink from them for special occasions. Everything else pretty much fair game.
I am not saying these items are valuable moneywise but I made a conscious choice to keep them.
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Post by larataylor on Sept 11, 2014 22:12:10 GMT -5
Oh, this thread was good for me! So many people have asked me why I'm not having yard sales. The very thought gives me a headache. I've looked up a few things on ebay, and felt some guilt about giving away stuff that I could be getting money for. But some part of me has resisted that … there is so much here, and trying to get money for things would just slow me down.
Really, it will be SO much more worth it to get the house under reasonable control and then get a JOB.
I did hope we would find a $25,000 book in the hoard. The best book we found was a first edition from 1757 in great condition. Might be worth $1000-1200 to someone. And I sold the in-laws' home sauna for $250. And some people have just given me a bit of money for things even though I didn't ask for it. But mostly, I think if something isn't worth over $100, trying to sell it probably isn't worth it.
Lara
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Post by dayeanu on Sept 14, 2014 23:33:41 GMT -5
One thing I've noticed in sorting out stuff......the more time I spend sifting through my clutter, the less appeal it all has, and the "perceived" value (to me) declines sharply! Makes it easier to part with.
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Post by lostchild on Sept 14, 2014 23:38:08 GMT -5
Daye I noticed that the more I clean the less I keep. I have been tossing left and right.When my daughter goes to school I will toss some of her facial scrubs because they are honey based so I find they attract ants. I don't want to hurt her feelings by her seeing them get trashed!!!
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Post by larataylor on Sept 15, 2014 0:09:59 GMT -5
I noticed that the more I clean the less I keep. I notice this, too! I want to clean fast, and I don't want stuff in my way! No stuff on the floor. No stuff on the furniture. No stuff that makes it harder to move the couch. If I have to move something to clean, that thing better have a good reason to be in the house. |
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Post by lostchild on Sept 15, 2014 1:03:48 GMT -5
I have watched the hoarding shows on TV and in some cases I am appalled when they toss nice items into the bin and destroy them. However I also see many people overvaluing their belongings Because it is television we don't smell what they throw out. I had a friend who literally hoarded her antiques into trash. Because they were improperly taken care of they smelled of mold,they had rusted beyond antique into trash,those so call nice looking items had been urinated upon by rats and racoons and cats. Holes eaten thru from moths,infested with termites and roaches with eggs clinging to them. All that so called nice stuff probably had a lot of hidden to the viewer problems. I wouldn't have any of a hoarder's stuff in my house. The true waste was the hoarders refusing to see the big picture and admitting defeat on keeping a lot of these items. |
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