babetteq
New Member
Joined: September 2008
Posts: 7
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Post by babetteq on Sept 25, 2008 16:12:36 GMT -5
Hi everyone. I'm about to move. We;ve been asked to move because the landlords are putting thier aged mother in. However, I have my doubts about whether that is true or whether they want us out because we're too messy.
I'm not as bad as I used to be. Honestly. But between me and my partner we just can't keep it together. The last three months I worked every single day on very little sleep and the place absolutely fell apart. I was maintaining okay before that.... not great, but I could still have family over.
Now, we do have pets, a cat and 2 birds. They are taken care of. Their cages/areas are kept clean and the catbox I do once a week or more.
I am more likely to do day to day maintenance than my partner, but I never finish anything. Never finish the dishes, the laundry, the bathroom... .
That being said, the place smells like mouldy dishes, there are fruit flies EVERYWHERE coming up like little dark clouds every time I move anything.
I hate it. It's humiliating and makes me feel like a homeless teenager. I am a professional with a good reputation. Unless someone sees my house.
We have GOT to get it under control. And on a daily basis. At least every couple days. It doesn't have to be great, but it can't go on like this. It takes all my energy to make sure I have a coffee cup in the morning and a clean spoon.
We have to move at the end of next month (5 wks) and I just want to throw everything away.
I don't know what to do. On my own I can maintain somewhat - although I still have to do 'binge' cleaning. But with a partner who's just as bad, if not somewhat worse, it's outta control. It makes me feel out of control, guilty, ashamed and angry. It makes me cranky. It paralysis me.
I'm a hard worker. I often hold down two or more jobs, I have 2 high maintenance animals, I volunteer, I grow my own food, do my own canning, mend my clothes, help out my family. I don't stop all day. But when I get home I see all this stuff and I just want to cry. In fact, there are days that I do cry.
I don't know what to do.
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Post by Arid on Sept 25, 2008 18:51:09 GMT -5
It is easy to get rid of the fruit flies: Put 1 and 1/2 C. of water into a shallow bowl. Stir in 2 Tbsp. sugar and 1/4 C. cider vinegar. Then, drop on 2 drops of liquid dishwashing liquid--DO NOT STIR. The fruit flies will be attracted to the solution because of the sugar and the vinegar. (They will think that it is overripe fruit.) The dishwashing liquid changes the surface tension of the liquid, causing them to drown. When the dish gets too full of fruit flies, dump the solution, and make up a new batch.
Be sure to look for any rotting foods that you have lying around. Get rid of it (them) as soon as possible, and clean up any mess that is left behind. Be sure to check your veggies, too--including things like onions and potatoes.
It is important that you start taking some time for yourself! If you devote all of your time and energy to work and family, you won't have anything left "in the tank" to attend to your own home. You need to take the time to save yourself!
Welcome to the board.
Arid
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Post by messymimi on Sept 25, 2008 19:35:30 GMT -5
Welcome babetteq  !
Moving can be a blessing if you use it as an opportunity to get rid of excess stuff. So start throwing stuff away. If you don't want to pay to move it, or maintain it after you move, pitch it.
Talk to your partner about working on this together. You can't keep up your schedule and clean up after two people.
arid is right in saying that you need some time to take care of yourself. Please do so.
messymimi
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babetteq
New Member
Joined: September 2008
Posts: 7
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Post by babetteq on Sept 26, 2008 1:37:24 GMT -5
Thanks for the info on getting rid of them. I generally use a bottle full of apple cider vinegar and they all flock over to it and drowned. But there's no use putting out traps while there are still dishes lying around, bits of food in the garbage and on the table.... Breed them on one side, kill them on the other...
Tomorrow I'll be able to put some time into cleaning,. We've had the cleaning conversation a million times. We've had check lists, nags, arguments, silent sullen cleanings, 'go for it' pep talks with each other.... it's a real battle & struggle. I can 'take time for me' all I want, but there is twice the work to do when I finish having 'me' time so I usually don't bother. Vegging out in front of the computer seems to be the best I can do.
Thanks for the support guys.
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Post by greenfuzz on Sept 27, 2008 9:22:42 GMT -5
Welcome,
We all really know how you feel. Moving can be a good thing I agree with messymimi, it helps you start fresh. It's very emotional, as well though so you might consider backing off on your other commitments if you can. Let go of the volunteering for a bit, and the growing, sewing, canning. All of that is very green but I think it's true that one can't do it all and right now the focus has to be on cleaning, clearing, packing and finding a new home.
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Post by BC on Sept 27, 2008 9:59:52 GMT -5
 Welcome to the board!!!!
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Post by crazycatlady on Sept 28, 2008 21:37:31 GMT -5
Welcome, BabetteQ. I'm sure that you will get lots of help and encouragement here. Just keep moving forward, and reading, and posting. It really does help!
Good luck with the fruit flies. I just threw out 3 peaches today as they were suddenly swarming with the little pests! Grrrrrrrrrr! One note-I remember someone saying they used the vacuum to suck the flies right out of the air, to reduce the swarm.
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