becuma
New Member
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 8
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Post by becuma on Oct 20, 2008 12:37:47 GMT -5
Hi all,
I've lurked for a bit here, now I'd like to ask something. Or just get some perspective on this?
I like to have everything clean, and for the past decade have managed that quite well. (I used to be a proper grotbox, level 3 or something? I still have way too much stuff, but at least everything is usable.) A few years ago, my boyfriend moved in, along with his dog, a rottweiler. (And a truck-load of superfluous belongings which are crowding the house a bit, seeing as that I already had it filled to the rafters, that he won't get rid of, but that's another thread :-))
Now here's my problem. This dog has become incontinent. It's been to the vet, had about £700 worth of examinations/treatments but nothing worked. They keep wanting to prescribe antibiotics at £60 a pop, but they don't help either. One of their recommendations was castration which was also useless, but since then the urine smells a lot worse.
Everywhere this dog goes, it leaks. Its bed needs changing constantly, causing huge piles of washing. Everything reeks of ammonia, completely overpowering, including the dog itself since he's being marinated in it all the time. Some mornings I come into the living room (where his bed is, and hasn't been changed during the night), and I have to run straight out again to vomit. Some mornings I wish I'd woken up dead :-)
This situation is totally doing my head in. Sometimes I resolve not to clean again until it is dead, but after a while the chaos gets on my nerves and I have to clean again.
There's a table in front of the stairs so that the dog can't go upstairs, and another room has the door permanently shut, but that still leaves an awfully long trail from the front room to the back door, all coated in piss and hair.
A friend recommended building a heated shed in the garden, but a) we don't have money for that, and b) b/f won't have him outside anyway.
The only thing the b/f will say about it when I complain is, why don't you take him to the vet to have him put down then. I think that's a bit unfair; it isn't my dog. I want its bed to be in the back room or the kitchen, but he wants the dog in the living room. Basically I have curtailed most of this dog's freedoms already anyway: when he still lived on his own, it was allowed on his bed, on the furniture, whatever it wanted really but I would have none of that, even before the incontinence started.
(A while back I'd forgotten (!) to heap shoes & boxes & such on the sofa when I went out, and the dog had got on. It took two days to clean and a week to dry...)
What on earth am I going to do to cope with this wretched animal? It is sapping my will to live clean. As I write this my eyes and throat are burning because the dog & bed are right behind me.
Hmm this has turned into a bit of a long and incoherent whinge, hope that's ok? Thanks for reading it anyway.
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Post by heylady1 on Oct 20, 2008 12:51:26 GMT -5
You have every right to be upset about this!!! What about doggy diapers? I believe most pet stores have them but if they don't (or don't carry/make a size for your dog) you could always improvise. I remember when I was a kid our dog was a full female and when she went into heat we made her a diaper out of an old sheet and inside we put more rags/torn up sheets? or something to catch the blood. Worked like a charm and kept the house clean which made life oh-so-much-better with my mom who wasn't an animal lover anyway!!  Maybe an adult diaper for humans with a hole cut in it for his tail?? |
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Post by DJ on Oct 20, 2008 12:55:39 GMT -5
i'm afraid i am going to get flamed for this possibly.. in my relationship i am the animal worshipper... the cats sleep on the bed, my ancient ferret hops up on the bed for a snooze... i will give them all that they are good and gentle animals but it is a zoo around here, and it's mine..my cat's 19 and has slept in bed with me since i was 10 and will continue to be allowed to do so til he dies. future pets are up for discuss but the status quo for me with the pets remains, they've been around longer than anyone i've dated...
that being said.. i would have huge issues having an animal, especially such a large animal who was incontinent in my home... especially if someone else was forced to cope with it... that is a lot of urine.. and from past experience with incontinent animals, my own and at a vet clinic, i'd be worried about the health of the rottie... urine/ammonia burns can be bad...
is your rottie stiff? does he have hip displasia or arthritis or display symptoms of it? i can see that you've already had alot of workups done on him but it's the only thing i can think of suggesting, healthwise.. my cat went through a period of incontinence.. treating him for his arthritis essentially solved the problem. aside from that you might investigate doggie diapers. you really need to keep them clean, keep them taken care of, and still walk them so they can defecate, but it might help with the incontinence being such a terrible issue in the home... if your boyfriend is really that devoted to his dog you could try explaining that it might be a way of making everyone able to continue living together.
my heart goes out to both of you though.. and i can only imagine that your boyfriend lashes out at you like that because of his own sadness at the obviously downhill course of health of his dog... it's heartbreaking when you keep doing all the things you're suppose to do and it doesn't work.. i am very sorry for the situation and hope you can find some sort of resolution.
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Post by brenda on Oct 20, 2008 14:19:41 GMT -5
It seems like the humane thing would be to put the dog down. Clearly you have tried all sorts of medical intervention. It is not healthy to live among feces for either you or the dog.
It seems to me that your boyfriend should be the one cleaning up after the dog and taking it to be put down. If you continue your relationship with him be prepared for him to continue to push the ugly tasks on you.
Good luck
Brenda
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Post by Arid on Oct 20, 2008 14:27:22 GMT -5
I can just imagine what would happen next if you actually DID have the animal put down! The boyfriend probably wouldn't hesitate to "put you down."
Frankly, I'm not so sure that this is a problem with the animal. It sounds more like a relationship problem to me. It doesn't sound to me like the boyfriend cares very much about your feelings or health at all.
Breathing in all of that ammonia is very, very bad for your lungs. At this point, I'd ask both of them to leave!
If you really wish to keep the both of them in your life, perhaps trying the doggie diapers, etc. will help. By the way--MAKE THE BOYFRIEND PAY FOR THEM! He should be the one who sees to it that the dirty ones make it to the outside garbage can, too. HIS DOG--HIS RESPONSIBILITIES.
Good luck,
Arid
Since it is his dog, he should be taking the dog outside; he should be helping with the clean-up, and he should be taking your feelings into consideration.
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Post by Arid on Oct 20, 2008 14:30:30 GMT -5
How odd!!!
While I agree with everything that it says, I DID NOT WRITE THE SENTENCE THAT FOLLOWS MY NAME IN MY PREVIOUS POST!!! Perhaps, that sentence was supposed to be a part of Brenda's post. . .?
Arid
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Post by notsomessyshell on Oct 20, 2008 14:39:26 GMT -5
Another animal lover here. I have put up with quite a bit with my animals over the years. I had a siamese that had bowel issues. I am ashamed to admit I let it go longer than I should have. I put up with her having accidents until she was physically in pain before I put her down, but my family lived with never knowing if there would be feces in their bed or on their floor....sad. I was thinking compromise by using the diapers at night at least? I think he should be the one to deal with the morning mess. Unfair for you to deal all the time with it.  |
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Oct 20, 2008 22:23:33 GMT -5
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becuma
New Member
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 8
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Post by becuma on Oct 21, 2008 5:51:24 GMT -5
Thank you all for the replies! I'll address some of the issues:
* Diapers and the such: the biggest one for sale wasn't big enough. I made one myself on the same pattern that was even bigger -- doesn't stay in place, pees right over the edge. The over-large anatomy is rather awkwardly placed...
* There is nothing else wrong with this dog, it is not in pain, no stiffness, no limping, it can (and does) run and jump and whatnot. In fact it is often judged to be half its age by other dog owners; even the vet guessed wrong. There are no urine burns or anything like that, the bed gets changed too often for that.
* B/f does all the dog-related stuff like changing the bed. Plus he puts up with my cats a lot more gracefully than I could ever manage with the dog, and they are a total nuisance at times too. I knew he had a dog when I met him, but I had no idea what that meant on a day-to-day basis. My family had a (big) dog when I was a child, but my mother seems to have done a fantastic job keeping dander at bay. I never even realised they shed hair all year round.
* The dog is 9 years old. The maximum age is about 10-12 for this breed? (Although the other day someone told me theirs lived to be 15). If there was another 20 years of this I might be tempted to try the "me or the dog" stunt, but in this case it doesn't seem appropriate to pull the plug on an otherwise totally fine relationship.
Thanks again for all your input, I think I've calmed down a little bit now. In fact I may now feel brave enough to post my introduction bit -- get ready for more yawn!
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Post by heylady1 on Oct 21, 2008 12:29:06 GMT -5
This website here www.petdiapers.com/diaper/cdiaper/ deals with doggy diapers that "should" work for a male dog. The only problem is the sizing. They go up to a XXL but the weight limit is 66lbs or a 33" waist. Just to see I checked my own dog, a mixed breed male who weighs in at 85lbs. His waist is 34" so it wouldn't fit. But if you could sew a little bit, I bet you could modify one of them to fit by putting in some fabric and a bigger elastic waist in there. Or possibly make your own if you are good at that kind of thing. If you aren't, maybe you know someone who is?? I think I would do anything to try and stop the "flow"...  Glad you're feeling better about things today!!!  |
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Post by mariposa on Oct 21, 2008 18:31:53 GMT -5
Have you gotten a second opinion? Sometimes a different set of eyes (the vet) can think of something fresh.
When I worked at a vet (many years), incontinent dogs were often helped by phenylpropanolamine, brand name Proin - have you tried that?
I know you said you've spent a lot of money, but has the dog been checked lately for a UTI? That could make the urine smell. Also there's the in-house tests they usually do (a dip stick test where they check several levels of things in the urine, and a specific gravity test) and then there's the urine culture, where they send it to the lab and wait for a week or so to see if it grows any particular bacteria. Has that been done?
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