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Post by messimo on Oct 21, 2008 12:07:17 GMT -5
HUBBY has decluttered the car. HUBBY is cleaning up the yard. It looks so much better! HUBBY is cleaning out part of the garage so that we can get our second car in. Hubby  has done so much, but the little progress I made on our kitchen and family room A MONTH AGO seems to pale in comparison.  I really haven't made any progress since then. I've somewhat been able to maintain what I did last month, but little by little I'm starting to see things go back to where they were in those areas. Every room in our house is a squalorous mess. I need to start working on the house again. I think I really need to start doing the 15 minute timer thing. If you all could just say a little prayer for me, I'd really appreciate it. -messimo P.S. Grr. I need to stop feeling sorry for myself. I did do ONE thing (vacuumed the kitchen floor). And we did end up with 11 large bags of shredded paper (from "need to shred" piles accumulated over the last 10 years). And I've been cooking and trying to make sure we eat all our leftovers (instead of waiting until they sprout hair and legs before throwing them out). And not letting the dishes or laundry pile up too much. Okay... it's time for me to get to work cleaning... |
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Post by AnnieOkie on Oct 21, 2008 12:50:04 GMT -5
Hang in there messimo! At least you are maintaining what you have done so far. That is kind of where I am at right now and I really need to get another room done. It's just finding the starting point for me and not stopping until it is done. We can do this!!  |
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Post by heylady1 on Oct 21, 2008 12:51:46 GMT -5
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Post by shabbychic on Oct 21, 2008 14:42:46 GMT -5
Messimo, I noticed you did several necessary but non-decluttering things, like cooking and dishes and laundry, as well as maintenance cleaning. DH was just decluttering. I've noticed the same thing when I have had help cleaning (either my exH or the kids). It looks like they're doing so much more, but I'm feeding them, doing their laundry, changing the baby etc. IMO why we don't make as much progress as we'd like, and why we need help - there is so much else to do.
Maybe one day change it up, if there's an area that you need to clean - like your clothes closet for instance - see if he will do the cooking and stuff so you can do that. Then you can feel that sense of accomplishment when you've done something big and visible.
Congrats on all you (plural) have gotten done as a team.
Shabby Chic
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Post by messymimi on Oct 21, 2008 15:34:55 GMT -5
If you are feeding your family, doing laundry, and keeping up with the multitude of everyday things that have to be done to run a house, then You Are Doing A Great Job!
No, it doesn't show like a huge declutter project. That doesn't mean it isn't just as much work.
I sometimes think for some of us that is part of how we get into a squalorous situation to begin with. Yes, there are plenty of other factors, but I think sometimes we want to see a huge reward for our work -- a large, messy area is suddenly clean -- so we let things slide until we will get that thrill of seeing our progress. Then we get overwhelmed and you know the rest.
So please be as proud of yourself for all you do for your family as I am. Also, yes, I will be praying for you.
messymimi
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Post by threeg on Oct 21, 2008 18:16:14 GMT -5
Messimo you are working hard too, so please don't feel bad. Yes DH has done a lot that shows, but what YOU have done is just as important and is hard work as well! (I hate to vaccum.) My DSO and my friends don't always notice what I do, but I know how hard I have worked and just how hard it was to do. So maybe you haven't "seen" a big change, but it was a big change. If you hadn't vaccuumed the floor, it would be a lot messier. If you didn't cook, or get anything else done, it would be worse, so try and look at the bright side. You ARE doing things to improve your life and surroundings. Good for You!  3g |
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Post by threeg on Oct 21, 2008 18:17:21 GMT -5
Not counting ELEVEN bags of shredding! WOW! 3g
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Post by Arid on Oct 21, 2008 19:28:26 GMT -5
Maintaining is a hard, HARD job! That's why so many of us fail at it for years on end. Here, on this board, you will learn how to do it.
As someone pointed out, while your husband has been decluttering, YOU have been enabling him by cooking for him, doing the laundry, washing dishes, etc.
My husband once (note, I said "ONCE!") made the *mistake* of saying to me, "I don't know why it takes you so long to get ready for a trip; I can get packed in 15 minutes." Well, you know what--I *explained* to him that he could pack in 15 *#^*ing minutes BECAUSE *I* had just finished a FIVE HOUR MARATHON of doing laundry!!!! Men. . . !!!
Hang in there; you are doing fine. Go back to do maintenance work on the areas that you had cleaned previously before they revert back to squalor. You will feel a LOT better once you do.
Arid
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Blackswan
Banned
Joined: October 2008
Posts: 6,388
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Post by Blackswan on Oct 22, 2008 0:59:57 GMT -5
It sounds like you both did a great job! Don't forget to give him a big hug and a kiss! You do want him to do more decluttering, don't you? There's plenty squalor to go around, don't fight over it!  |
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Post by messimo on Oct 22, 2008 6:46:40 GMT -5
Thanks everyone, for letting me vent and for the words of encouragement. I should add that my wonderful hubby often helps with the cooking (we cook as a team), but with him doing so much work in the yard I've been trying to do more in the kitchen. I'm so proud of the work my hubby has done (and ds, too--he's been helping his dad after completing his schoolwork for the day). Too bad the weather is starting to become dreary, or we'd all spend more time in our "new" back yard! -messimo P.S. Today I sorted through some old letters my friends and I exchanged when I was in elementary school. What silly girls we were! "Do you like Mary? I don't like Jane. Who do you write to? I'm going to write in a secret code now." (Names changed to protect the innocent.)  Now I have to decide what to DO with those letters... |
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