blossoms
New Member
Joined: February 2018
Posts: 7
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Post by blossoms on Feb 12, 2018 13:35:02 GMT -5
I'm practically living in a bin. There are piles on the floor that I'm scared to go through because of what may be LIVING underneath there, I haven't had clean clothes in a while, I've been given an ultimatum by a flatmate to clean the huge pile of dishes in the kitchen which are covered in mould and God knows what else, she doesn't understand that I've had every intention to clean for weeks but all I've been able to do is cry for hours in bed (on a mattress that is filthy) and order food from outside, I haven't gone out in a long while.
I guess I'll have to start by cleaning the dishes so I don't have to hear any more from her. Then throw rubbish out and disinfect everything, then laundry and sorting through my stuff, then somehow finding a vacuum cleaner I can use because I'm so broke I can't even afford food for the week let alone a vacuum cleaner.
I'm tired of living this way, I'm making a promise to myself to live a productive and orderly life. And no more crying!
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Post by Tea on Feb 12, 2018 15:49:45 GMT -5
My first impression is that you sound very lonely and depressed. Squalor is so often a byproduct of mental health, grief, et cetera. You've definitely come to the right place for understanding, empathy and support with regards to the mess! There is so much advice and experience here for you to discover and lean on. Stick with us, read a lot and remember that this is not insurmountable.
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blossoms
New Member
Joined: February 2018
Posts: 7
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Post by blossoms on Feb 12, 2018 16:34:08 GMT -5
My first impression is that you sound very lonely and depressed. Squalor is so often a byproduct of mental health, grief, et cetera. You've definitely come to the right place for understanding, empathy and support with regards to the mess! There is so much advice and experience here for you to discover and lean on. Stick with us, read a lot and remember that this is not insurmountable. I am pretty lonely and depressed, have been for years. I will, thanks
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Post by joyinvirginia on Feb 12, 2018 16:37:55 GMT -5
Since you have been stuck inside, can you get outside for some fresh air even for 10 minutes? A change of scenery might help. We have a dog we have to walk, and it really does help to get outside and take a break from watching tv, being online, cleaning projects, etc. Do you have gloves to use while washing up? Hot soapy water, fill the sink, put the dishes in that will fit, let them soak about 5 minutes then the mold and ick will wash off easier. Do one sink full, rinse with hot water, dry, get new soapy water, repeat until done. Back when things were out of control and I was really depressed, antidepressant medication helped me get enough energy to get things under control. Let us know how you are doing.
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blossoms
New Member
Joined: February 2018
Posts: 7
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Post by blossoms on Feb 12, 2018 16:45:52 GMT -5
Since you have been stuck inside, can you get outside for some fresh air even for 10 minutes? A change of scenery might help. We have a dog we have to walk, and it really does help to get outside and take a break from watching tv, being online, cleaning projects, etc. Do you have gloves to use while washing up? Hot soapy water, fill the sink, put the dishes in that will fit, let them soak about 5 minutes then the mold and ick will wash off easier. Do one sink full, rinse with hot water, dry, get new soapy water, repeat until done. Back when things were out of control and I was really depressed, antidepressant medication helped me get enough energy to get things under control. Let us know how you are doing. Thanks for the tips. I've been put on different antidepressants and all they did was mess me up more.
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Post by Script on Feb 12, 2018 17:38:01 GMT -5
Since you have been stuck inside, can you get outside for some fresh air even for 10 minutes? A change of scenery might help. We have a dog we have to walk, and it really does help to get outside and take a break from watching tv, being online, cleaning projects, etc. About depression: I am a bit of an expert on it, having suffered various levels for all my adult life, ha ha. I know that "going outside" is not exactly the most brilliant answer to life's horrible problems, but RESEARCH does show that movement/activity helps A LOT with coping with depression. Maybe you can't make yourself FEEL better instantly, but you can help yourself cope. Boy-oh-boy looking for a new room-mate-or-place-to-live is not a happy future prospect. PS: I swear by a book called "Getting things done when you're depressed" which I read over-and-over again for YEARS to help me keep on keeping on. good luck! You are in a great place here!
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Post by nonchalant on Feb 12, 2018 20:24:52 GMT -5
I'm practically living in a bin. There are piles on the floor that I'm scared to go through because of what may be LIVING underneath there, I haven't had clean clothes in a while, I've been given an ultimatum by a flatmate to clean the huge pile of dishes in the kitchen which are covered in mould and God knows what else, she doesn't understand that I've had every intention to clean for weeks but all I've been able to do is cry for hours in bed (on a mattress that is filthy) and order food from outside, I haven't gone out in a long while. I guess I'll have to start by cleaning the dishes so I don't have to hear any more from her. Then throw rubbish out and disinfect everything, then laundry and sorting through my stuff, then somehow finding a vacuum cleaner I can use because I'm so broke I can't even afford food for the week let alone a vacuum cleaner. I'm tired of living this way, I'm making a promise to myself to live a productive and orderly life. And no more crying! One step at a time. You can do this, and it sounds like you already have a plan! Welcome aboard.
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Post by shellsncheese on Feb 12, 2018 21:12:41 GMT -5
Baby steps. Have you done the dishes yet? If not set a timer for 10 minutes and just wash for 10 minutes.
Come back here for advise and we will help you get going. You can do this!
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blossoms
New Member
Joined: February 2018
Posts: 7
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Post by blossoms on Feb 12, 2018 23:03:48 GMT -5
I've just been crying all night. It's 4am and I'm going to try to do the dishes and try not to think about what's making me cry.
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Post by shellsncheese on Feb 12, 2018 23:11:11 GMT -5
I'm up and working, right now. Take a deep breath and do the dishes for 10 minutes then come check in. YOU CAN DO THIS!!!
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Post by jendela on Feb 12, 2018 23:16:50 GMT -5
Sending positive thoughts your way. As shells says, just start with 10 minutes.
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blossoms
New Member
Joined: February 2018
Posts: 7
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Post by blossoms on Feb 13, 2018 1:09:47 GMT -5
Thanks so much I finished doing the dishes. Exhausted, will try to sleep for a couple of hours.
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Post by shellsncheese on Feb 13, 2018 1:16:40 GMT -5
Congratulations!!!! That is a huge accomplishment. You should be proud of yourself.
Take some time and sleep and then come back and work in one of the threads or chat. The easiest place to start next is to pick up a bag of obvious trash. Personally, I liked setting a timer and going, but other like things like X items of trash. Do what works for you.
When I first started cleaning my worst room, I could only handle cleaning it in 2 minute increments. No amount of time is too small. Just make progress.
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Post by Script on Feb 13, 2018 2:17:08 GMT -5
Thanks so much I finished doing the dishes. Exhausted, will try to sleep for a couple of hours. Hurrah! I am up in the middle of the night taking a hot flash break! Your post cheers me right up! xxoo
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Post by def6 on Feb 13, 2018 16:04:20 GMT -5
Hello blossoms and Welcome aboard! I'm sorry you are feeling so down right now and that the meds that you are on seem not to help. I hope that you will be a "squeaky wheel" on your own behalf to access the physicians help and correct meds that you need. Congratulations on getting the dishes done! That is a huge accomplishment. You deserve clean dishes and a clean place to sleep for that matter. I hope you will make sure these type "comfort" measures are attended to. Make sure you have at least 1 clean outfit: including underwear to change into. You can hand wash in the sink and dry outside. This is only a start...please let us know.
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