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Post by Jannie on Mar 3, 2018 8:55:37 GMT -5
My husband passed away last June.I've been slowly going throughhis belongings. Most things are easy to decide to give to family members or charity or to toss. But then there are some hand-made items. His sister made him a chess set in a ceramics class many years ago. He wasn't a chess master or anything like that, I don't play chess myself, so what should I do with this set? I thought I could offer it to his sister, put it in a box for charity, or should I just do what's easiest and throw it out? Then there's another hand-made item I found. When our first daughter was born, my sister made us a beautiful framed cross-stitch sampler with the baby's name, date, height and weight. My daughter doesn't want it. ve plenty of stuff already hanging on my walls. I asked my sister if she wants it back, of course she said no. Should I toss it? I do feel guilty throwing anything made by a loved one's hands into the garbage.
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Post by nifty50 on Mar 3, 2018 9:18:57 GMT -5
I'm sorry for your loss and sympathetic about the cleaning-up task. Went through this with a loved one's belongings not long ago.
For the chess set, I'd ask the sister who made it, first.... and then if she didn't want it, I'd take it to Goodwill as it sounds like it would be desirable for someone. Lots of schools have chess clubs and possibly could use another set.
The personalized sampler is a different story, being obviously not usable to anyone except the original subject or recipients. I agree it's tough to discard handmade gifts but I don't see any other solution for that item. I'm sorry.
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Post by magda on Mar 3, 2018 9:51:36 GMT -5
This is my hardest category so take my response w a grain of salt
The chess set -I would offer to the sister who made. If she did not want and no kids (or grand kids did?) I would donate or toss or sell rather easily as opposed to the sampler. That would be much harder for me. but if your dd or her kids don’t want it , and you don’t want it, then it really has no value. I am pretty certain I would keep though. Anything related to my dd babyhood is my most challenging stuff. So don’t listen to me. And I know I’d love to have one commemorating my mom’s birth. Would a grandchild want? Good luck and my sympathy on this hard time of going through a loved ones stuff. That is hard!
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Post by moggyfan on Mar 3, 2018 10:16:39 GMT -5
I second the idea of offering the chess set to a middle school or high school (if sister doesn't want it). We have a set in the library at my school and it gets a lot of use.
As far as the sampler goes, you've done all you could. Toss guilt-free ;-) Or if you decide you can't, remove from frame and tuck inside a scrapbook or drawer.
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Post by magda on Mar 3, 2018 10:22:53 GMT -5
After posting here, I was surfing around this site and just read a post by creativechaos in a thread about “plogging.@ not sure how to post links on my phone here. She says don’t become a hoarder in her post. That made me return to say if you are questioning these items , go with your gut and get rid of them!
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Post by phoenixcat on Mar 3, 2018 11:13:40 GMT -5
Maybe take a picture of anything that is causing stress. DM had ornaments of all the pets over the years - big round fragile ball ornaments. I took pictures of the ornaments in groups and created one flat "picture" ornament. So, dozens reduced to one. That might be a thought to take a picture of some sentimental baby things and make an ornament if she routinely decorates for the holidays. Doesn't take up hardly any space and always will bring a smile when coming out of the holiday box. My two cents But the "take a picture of it" has pushed both myself and DM through a lot of tough choices.
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Post by Jannie on Mar 3, 2018 17:12:00 GMT -5
I'm going to keep the embroidery sampler. My Mom passed about 5 years ago, and I was happy then to acquire a baby plate with my name on it painted by a neighbor when I was born. I have it hanging in my dining room, funny, it shows the year I was born ! Maybe my daughter will have a change of heart when she buys a home, something way off in her future it seems. I will offer the ceramic chess set back to the sister who made it. If she doesn't want it, I'll save it for when my local high school has its annual rummage sale.
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Post by purpleangel on Mar 3, 2018 21:50:40 GMT -5
Jannie - Just wanted to say that I'm so sorry for your loss of your husband. Sending you prayers for healing and vibes for strength and courage on your new journey. I like your decision to keep the sampler and that you kept the baby plate from your childhood. My Mom passed away and buried in her things was a ceramic "handprint" that I made when I was very tiny. Dated 1972! It makes me happy and laugh when I see that and remember that once - truly - I was a little girl. Your DD may want this someday. Or when she discovers it, it may make her laugh one day. Gentle hugs to you.
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Post by catcat on Mar 4, 2018 1:29:15 GMT -5
Jannie--I think you are making good decisions about these items. And I am so sorry about the death of your husband. Sending hugs to you. catcat
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Post by danny15 on Mar 4, 2018 6:07:07 GMT -5
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Post by def6 on Mar 4, 2018 18:02:27 GMT -5
Hello Jannie...If I had the same decisions to make I would ask your children if they want the chess set or the grandchildren, if not, donate. If the daughter does not want the embroidered piece to keep...I would get rid of it. If you can't , sometimes you can hide it behind a piece of furniture in your house.
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pepsi
New Member
Joined: July 2017
Posts: 22
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Post by pepsi on Mar 7, 2018 10:41:59 GMT -5
I don't know how big the sampler is, or if this would be helpful -- I had a hard time getting rid of kids' baby clothes. Donated a lot, but also had a bunch made into a quilt. I just kept Christening dress and a couple of other handmade items to pass down. Maybe depending on the size of the sampler, you could make it into a quilt with your daughter's other baby clothes, if you saved any.
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