|
|
Post by jollyoutdoorsman on Dec 11, 2021 20:42:26 GMT -5
So, I was 3rd degree squalor two months ago, and I'm down to 1st degree squalor now.
It's been hard because, when I describe this on Internet forums, instead of congratulations I get condemnation for where I still am. I'm told to stop dating, stop vacationing, stop going anything fun until my home is fully functional for my kids. I'm told to seek therapy for how I ever got to 3rd degree squalor. Well, I want to see my partner, I want to enjoy the holidays with my kids, AND I want to keep taking steps to improve. I am seeing a therapist. It's terrifying having areas of my home that if a friend or my partner saw, I worry they would breakup with me on the spot. But there are fewer of those spots every week. Anyway, hello out there fellow strugglers and improvers! (:
|
|
|
|
Post by goldenthreads on Dec 11, 2021 20:59:26 GMT -5
Welcome! There is support here. From third degree to first degree in two months is amazing. I would not go back to any of those forums where you've read that kind of criticism. Those people are actually harmful to your spirit. At best they waste your time by saying nothing useful.  |
|
|
|
Post by Nael_C on Dec 12, 2021 1:39:08 GMT -5
Hello and welcome jollyoutdoorsman ! You came at the right place! No judgmental, harmful critics here, everyone is super nice, kind and encouraging, cheering you up as you go along the path to freedom from clutter and squalor. Good luck to you, enjoy your holidays with your family! |
|
|
|
Post by joyinvirginia on Dec 12, 2021 8:54:37 GMT -5
Hello and welcome! You have done GREAT! And should be proud of your accomplishment! CONGRATS!
Edited to add: we each have the freedom to decide what is Good Enough for our situation at any particular time. Not perfect, but good enough for right now.
|
|
|
|
Post by larataylor on Dec 12, 2021 14:58:36 GMT -5
jollyoutdoorsman - I found this forum for a similar reason! People were saying stupid and even mean things to me. That's never happened here.  on getting from 3rd degree to 1st degree!
|
|
|
|
Post by def6 on Dec 13, 2021 0:40:34 GMT -5
Hello jollyoutdoorsman I like that you addressed us as fellow strugglers and improvers ... that we are!  Just like you said Part of the struggle is dealing with the mess and part is the anxiety you feel if you get found out. I hope you get all sorted out. |
|
|
|
Post by wynken on Dec 15, 2021 18:45:55 GMT -5
Welcome @jollyhollyman.
You have done great to make that much improvement.
Pat yourself on the back for every effort you make and the planning you do.
Bah humbug to the critics.
|
|
|
|
Post by jollyoutdoorsman on Dec 22, 2021 22:06:38 GMT -5
Thanks for the warm welcome! Looking forward to reading your threads, too. (:
|
|
|
|
Post by Nael_C on Dec 23, 2021 0:51:00 GMT -5
Thanks for the warm welcome! Looking forward to reading your threads, too. (: Hi again jollyoutdoorsman! Be sure to search some of the older threads in the Squalor Board section, I found them invaluable, hope they work for you the same! Have a nice day!
|
|
|
|
Post by SetMeFree on Jan 1, 2022 3:47:29 GMT -5
Welcome. I have seen the snarky judgmental comments in other cleaning groups (especially on Facebook) and they are anything but helpful. I myself joined a few hoping for support but I saw how the members sniped at each other. There was no way I was going to post photos of my place or even be completely honest about my situation, so I never participated.
I have been a member of SOOS for a long time and I can attest that this is the best place for support anywhere on the internet.
Glad you found your way here.
|
|
