freespace
New Member
Joined: June 2008
Posts: 4 
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Post by freespace on Jun 20, 2008 15:44:10 GMT -5
Hi, I'm new here. First degree squalor by definition, but I feel totally out of control sometimes  Is there a degree 1.5? Because there are quite a lot of piles around my house and I wouldn't let anyone in unless I tidied it up first. Well anyway, the only reason im not a higher degree squalor is that I don't have rotting food around, I've found a moldy orange or mandarin now and then but its not common. Mostly its dishes, piles of books, and papers, and clothing. How it affects me is, I always feel overwhelmed by it. Even if i know to tidy it up, its so time consuming for me, I feel like I can't do anything else apart from tidying. Also, I find it really hard to throw things away, I always think of a way I COULD use them, and that makes it hard. I want to create things, and make things, but I keep too many things, and have not enough time to do that. I get depressed and feel like its hard to manage tidiness. On the occasions i tidy it all up, it comes back really soon, the piles, because I find it hard to manage these things no matter how much time I have. How should I start? Oh yeah, also all of this sounds like me: OCPD, OCD, and depressed. |
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Post by syzygy on Jun 20, 2008 16:09:08 GMT -5
You might find it helpful to read "Organizing from the Inside Out". It focuses on helping you figure out where and how to store things so that putting them away is just as easy as dropping them wherever you happen to be standing.
I've found that places where I've used this method stay organized. For example, I have a small drawer in the kitchen that I put batteries in. The drawer itself isn't organized; I just toss batteries in there. I've been storing them there for a couple of years and always know where batteries are. I can also look in there every once in a while and see right away if I need more.
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Post by messysue on Jun 20, 2008 22:23:22 GMT -5
You need ETE.
Erase the evidence.
IE: If you get it out, put it away -- today.
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Post by angelinahedgehog on Jun 21, 2008 0:39:02 GMT -5
I also found Julie Morgenstern's Organizing From The Inside Out useful, so if you can, see if you can track down a copy.
One thing I find is that there is a real underlying difference between tidying up and organizing. The immediate result may look similar: both will give a neat-looking area. However, the long-term results are far different: the tidied-up area gets messy quickly, and it's just as much work to tidy it up again as it was to tidy it up originally. The organized area may get untidy, but tidying it up is typically pretty easy, since there is a home for the items, and it's just a matter of returning them to their homes.
It's one of the ways I can tell what needs to be organized: if an area consistently gets untidy, and is consistently hard to tidy up, then there's some organizing to do!
So, for the dishes... What's going on? If they were all washed and dried, is there room for them in your cupboards? If they were all in your cupboards, could you get to them easily?
Same thing for clothes... Is there room in your closet and your drawers for all of them? If they were all put away, could you find a particular shirt or pair of pants easily?
For books and papers... You have my sympathy and empathy. I know I keep books because I might want to reread them someday. Or refer to them. And I keep yarn and cloth because I wanted to make X and I might still do it.
For each of those areas, though, I've had at least one major, brutal clear out. Painful to do, but... I found that clearing out the yarn got me unstuck from projects I didn't really want to do, and gave me new enthusiasm for getting other projects done. Same for sewing. And clearing out a lot of books let me find the books that I really want to reread.
Throwing stuff away can be difficult, especially if it seems that it could still be useful. This is why you may see the word "amnesty" used here and there. It means you aren't allowed to beat yourself up if you give it to goodwill instead of having a tag sale. Or if you toss it into the recycle bin instead of giving it to goodwill. Or if you toss it into the trash instead of the recycle bin. Right now, the important issue is whether you want and need the item at all, and if you don't want or need it, you have permission to get it out of your house any way possible. No need to search for the best possible way. You have amnesty.
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jonnyny
New Member
Joined: June 2008
Posts: 15
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Post by jonnyny on Jun 21, 2008 10:48:32 GMT -5
freespace- If you send me a PM with your mailing address I will mail you (for free) Julie Morgenstern's book on cassette tape.
And amazingly enough- I even know where it is!
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Post by mouse on Jun 21, 2008 11:00:07 GMT -5
Hi there, and welcome! When my cats aren't causing me to leap to 3rd degree, I tend to be in the same position that you are. What's helped me is the FlyLady system: www.flylady.netThe idea is to establish routines that keep you on top of your everyday clutter and messes, and also to spend a bit of time getting rid of clutter you don't need. The more Stuff you have, the harder it is to keep everything neat and tidy, because, really, you can't organize clutter. If everything you own is useful and/or has a permanent place to live (rather than "on top of this other pile of things" for instance), then tidying up becomes a much simpler process. Other people here have said very good things about Organizing from the Inside Out, which I haven't read, so I can't say for sure whether or not I find it good. I myself am a fan of FlyLady, because it starts out dirt simple and then works its way up through babysteps to maintenance. Good luck! ~Mouse |
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freespace
New Member
Joined: June 2008
Posts: 4
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Post by freespace on Jun 21, 2008 12:46:39 GMT -5
Wow, thanks everyone for the great advice. It's true, its mostly the organization that gets me. It's mostly that I don't know how to sort out hundreds and hundreds of items, it really frustrating to me. I hardly buy anything anymore because i know I would have to put it somewhere. I dont want to own stuff like books and cds, i just borrow it from the library. But the stuff i do need like clothes etc, that definitely need some kinda system to put away, even laundry can be daunting, because all the clothes have different recommended temperatures to wash them in, like 30 degrees, 40 degrees, 60 degrees, and then it either ends up on a pile or on the floor or im probably gonna start making 3 different bags to put them into. Funny enough, I found Flylady's website even when I was a teen, because i was already leaving piles around, but i was still too emotionally distressed to organise alot. But I'm def. going to check out Julie's book, thanks  |
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Post by mouse on Jun 21, 2008 13:01:21 GMT -5
freespace, Here's a hint about laundry: most of it can be washed at the same time, regardless of the "recommended" temperature. Divide between light and dark, delicate and non-delicate, and you're good to go. Otherwise, it just piles up. I figure it's a clothing-industry conspiracy to make us use more detergent.  ~Mouse |
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Post by Script on Jun 21, 2008 15:05:32 GMT -5
I figure it's a clothing-industry conspiracy to make us use more detergent. Also, manufacturers want to protect themselves as much as possible from possible complaints, so they are constantly putting "hand wash" on items. And.....giving advice on water temperatures and other issues. Some of which is counter-productive. Case in point: there was an incredible sale of quilted placemats at a store near my house. Gorgeous items, marked down about 90%. What?  ?? I looked them over and saw that the tag read, "Dry clean only." Now, who would dry clean cotton placemats? I am sure that this idiotic advice scared away most prospective buyers, and the store marked them down just to get rid of them. I figured I would buy some, give them a try, and if they fell apart in the wash, well, I could just throw them out because they were so cheap. That was 2 years ago, and they have been washed and dried multiple times. |
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Post by Moodle on Jun 22, 2008 16:02:05 GMT -5
Excellent point, Script. Great thread, everyone.
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Post by Alexandra on Jun 22, 2008 16:15:25 GMT -5
Laundry? I just shove it all in there, regardless of color. When you have a coin-op washer and dryer, it saves money.
New clothes, on the other hand, I'll wash separately the first washing.
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