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Post by mellowyellow on Jun 21, 2008 12:23:21 GMT -5
 Oops. I just checked my answering machine. I don't do it every day. I don't know why... I just avoid it. It turns out that three days ago, my insurance provider phoned to ask about my car insurance. They said that the Insurance Company indicated the half year bill wasn't paid. It was due on June 7!!!  Urgh. I totally forgot somehow. And now is Saturday, so the office is closed. So I phoned the bank, and paid it anyways. They will get it on Monday... But perhaps the account is no longer valid... It's been a few weeks now.  I had that bad pit-in-your-stomach feeling of panic. It used to happen all the time when I was super super messy and constantly missed deadlines. I haven't had that feeling for a long time. Suddenly, today it returned. Then suddenly I thought... Wait a minute.. What's the worst that can happen? They might be annoyed. They might insist that I pay a small fine. They might have to open a new car insurance account... But so what? That's all that can happen. Now, granted, this weekend I don't have insurance officially... So I just have to stay at home, or drive with utmost care. I won't be doing any big trips anyways. I think that it will be okay. It seems that too many times in my life, I have panicked about something that just wasn't worth panicking.
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Post by mouse on Jun 21, 2008 12:30:45 GMT -5
Urghk, indeed! I'm glad you're being sanguine about this, mellowyellow. Sure, it's annoying to have to pay late fees and the like, but if you can afford it this once and that's the worst that can happen, then it's not all that bad. I think most of us here on this board have had similar things happen, for various reasons. I once had a very stressful few months in which it was discovered that my "automatic" payments hadn't been going to the phone company for a year and a half, without anyone ever noticing! I owed them a ton of money. I scraped it all together, reduced my service to almost nothing (which I have kept to this day), and weathered the storm. It was unpleasant, and at the time I flailed and panicked a lot more than I should have, but on the whole it turned out okay. Sending good vibes your way!  ~Mouse |
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Post by Minnibella on Jun 21, 2008 15:47:52 GMT -5
I am moving this to byways, since its off topic.
Blessings
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Post by mellowyellow on Jun 21, 2008 21:58:00 GMT -5
I think I decided to post it in General because it was due to my kitchen clutter and my paperwork, instead of just general "duhness" that I forgot to pay... I should have specified.
I also feel badly posting something in Byways because it doesn't reach everyone.. and maybe the people who need it most won't see it. You know... all those people who read and lurk, but don't post... They might read this and think: "Hey, that's the same situation I'm going through. Maybe I'm not alone...".
I don't know... I still don't know how to suggest an improvement on that...
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Post by Minnibella on Jun 21, 2008 23:54:00 GMT -5
Melloyellow,
Yes, you are correct...I kinda thought that this topic could be considered in byways due to my perception about forgetting to pay bills as the main focus. I can understand that squalor can be an issue with doing things on time, finding documents, papers, etc.
I am moving this back to the General Board because I do feel more people could benefit from the subject and its root issue is squalor.
My sibling mods are considering how to best specify and pinpoint more effective definitions for each forum board.
Thank you so much for the patience in this matter.
Blessings.
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Post by Minnibella on Jun 22, 2008 0:00:42 GMT -5
Now for me to share....
I have forgot to pay many of my bills due to my squalor. Its a wonder that nothing has been cut off because of this. Now, I have had my car insurance policy cancelled and reinstated due to not finding the bill, not remembering where it is, or just forgetting about it.
Now, I write things in a planner as to not forget. Even then, I STILL end up waiting to the last minute to pay or to make arrangements to pay.
I would have to say that my paper clutter affects areas of my life also and just makes the squalor even worst. Sometimes, I just have to taker a deep breadth and exhale and do what needs to be done.
Blessings
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Post by reesa on Jun 22, 2008 2:32:47 GMT -5
Melloyellow, Yes, you are correct...I kinda thought that this topic could be considered in byways due to my perception about forgetting to pay bills as the main focus. I can understand that squalor can be an issue with doing things on time, finding documents, papers, etc. I am moving this back to the General Board because I do feel more people could benefit from the subject and its root issue is squalor. My sibling mods are considering how to best specify and pinpoint more effective definitions for each forum board. Thank you so much for the patience in this matter. Blessings. do you think we could have an area for financial/physical squalor as well? because a lot of these issues (no dentist, no insurance, paying bills late) are so related that they're not by-ways, but they're not "household squalor/hoarding" either it's just more of the same thing, in a different form I never made the connection until I read about financial squalor on the old site, it really made a lightbulb pop for me when I first read that term, and it helped me realize that it's all from the same issues I have just a thought and on-topic; i'ts good you're not freaking out, once you paid it even if it's late the worst is over! |
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Post by entropy on Jun 22, 2008 15:08:09 GMT -5
MellowYellow - I have forgotten to pay my car insurance a few times and they send a notice that it will be cancelled on a specified date (in about two weeks, I think), so if you didn't get a letter like that, I think you still have coverage. I think they legally have to notify you in writing before they drop your coverage.
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Post by Moodle on Jun 22, 2008 15:55:48 GMT -5
reesa says, "it's just more of the same thing, in a different form"
Exactly why this post is appropriate on the General Board. What mellowyellow started in this thread is congruent with the sequelae of symptoms at the heart of squalorous thinking. We need to grab every opportunity that we can to help each other. Feeling the need to over organize/compartmentalize is a part of the perfertionist thinking that goes with our condition/situation.
I am glad that this post was moved back for everyone to reflect on and support mellowyellow. This is something we do and it is all related to hoarding/squalor and the way we think.
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Post by messysue on Jun 22, 2008 16:32:21 GMT -5
Ditto on my medical insurance posting.
Squalor. Messiness. Procrastination. Forgetfulness. No follow up. Lack of attention to details. etc etc
I'm out of 3rd degree squalor but everything is still a effort!! And now & again I fall.
What works for me is routines, ETE & notes to self.
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Post by Minnibella on Jun 22, 2008 17:05:22 GMT -5
messysue, What is ETE??? And I thought the forgetfulness was just me!!!  . I wonder if there is a relationship between forgetfulness and squalor??? The forgetfulness and procrastination sound alot like my ADD....It's comforting to know that others go through this too. All I know, is that i cannot absolutely live without my planner.... |
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Post by mellowyellow on Jun 22, 2008 21:56:38 GMT -5
So tomorrow I find out what is happening with the insurance. Yes I am a bit anxious, and not as blase as it might seem... but I know that things will be resolved.
I have been good with putting my important papers in one spot, but I am not as good with going through the envelopes and paying things off. It's not that I don't have the money, but that I just don't like to open bills. I don't understand it really, because I don't owe any outstanding money, so there is no reason for me to fear bank statements or bills. Strange...
As for ETE... if I don't erase the evidence, things pile up in hours, not days...
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Post by crazycatlady on Jun 23, 2008 13:25:58 GMT -5
My Dad is getting VERY disorganized and forgetful. He had not paid his auto insurance for many months, so it was cancelled. We were able to renew his insurance, although it was costly. I would hope that you will simply be able to pay the bill and continue services, since it has only been a short time!
Isn't it frustrating!?! But as you said in your initial post, no need to panic.
DH pays all of our bills (thankfully). He switched most of them to on-line. Through our bank he can set up automatic transfers to pay the bills AFTER our paychecks are automatically deposited! It saves on that ugly step of putting the check into the envelope and mailing it out. And for the bills that are the same each month like the house payment, he doesn't really even need to open the bill when it arrives! 
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overcome
New Member
Joined: June 2008
Posts: 21
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Post by overcome on Jun 24, 2008 5:59:56 GMT -5
One thing I have found very useful-- as I too forget to pay bills, loose them, etc-- is to sign up for an autopayment plan through the bank.
I have a list of payees and I simply set up the payment and it is sent automatically, it can be a monthly thing (like rent), or a less frequent item.
I am also enrolled in electronic billing for my utilities-- I get an email 'bill' for my records and so I know how much it is but the bank is authorized to pay it (up to a certain limit-otherwise I must authorize the payment).
It honestly helps me so very much. I just came out of bankruptcy in January and the financial squalor really got me down.
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Post by CrimsonKat on Jun 24, 2008 20:28:20 GMT -5
mellowyellow, I just wanted to tell you that your post inspired me. My car ins payment was coming up and because of my stress about money issues lately, I was like a deer in the headlights. Sometimes when I feel overwhelmed, I become paralyzed, which of course, actually just compounds the problem. (I'm doing better overall, but you know how those bills and their deadlines are scary even when one HAS money can be.) I read your post and I thought, you know, she's right, no one will die if it's late. They provide a service, they want my money - what can they really do to me if I WAS late? Then, all of a sudden, the pressure lifted, and it became just another small thing I had to do. I was able to do it online, do it ON TIME, and it took 5 minutes! I know that if I just calmed down for a minute and told my anxiety to "take a hike, things like these are no big deal, people do this stuff every day" with a lot of things (cleaning, organizing, paying bills, little home projects, etc.), my life would feel a lot more managable. So, thanks for helping me to stay in ACTION, and not create a problem for myself. |
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