cavylady
New Member
Joined: June 2008
Posts: 68
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Post by cavylady on Jul 21, 2008 11:18:46 GMT -5
I've been doing great over the past week or so. Just digging in here and there to clean out a manageable area, then *trying* to focus on maintenance. (What IS IT about the kitchen, anyway? Turn my back and a bomb goes off in there.  ) This weekend I tackled the laundry monster and got almost all of the stuff sprinkled throughout the house cleaned and folded. About 4/5 of the folded stuff is put away too. Yesterday I cleaned all the toilets, took all the trash out of my youngest girl's room (seven), which wasn't much, put away only the clothes that fit her, and vacuumed her room and a bit of the hallway outside her door. At the end of last week I also dug into the piles of junk on the kitchen counters and swept and mopped the floor. I've been getting a lot done. I finish whatever project I'm on when I start getting tired, and day by day I haven't felt overwhelmed or exhausted. I check in on the boards to see what's going on in listzilla -- that gives me ideas for what to get to in the next few days. Overall, I feel really good about what I've been able to do for myself. Then this morning I seem to have lost it. I'm wandering through the house with tears just behind my eyelids. I can't focus on anything to do. I resent having to run another load of dishes (didn't I just DO the dishes yesterday?), and I'm trying hard not to crawl back into bed. My eldest daughter's away with her grandmother. My son is at camp, and my youngest daughter is home. So I really should do something with her until son comes home after lunch. But I really don't wanna. You know, just typing that out, the word "depressed" just whacked me between the eyes. It's been so long since I've had a dip. Dammit. I don't want to be depressed right now. Ugh. I think I'll go clear off the kitchen table again and put some breakfast out for her. It'll be a little maintenance, and maybe it will get me going again. |
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Post by BDG on Jul 21, 2008 11:50:01 GMT -5
Everyone has off days, days where it all seems futile and we just want to curl up and forget it.
Those are the days when we need to treat ourselves, whether it be something we have been longing to do, or order a pizza so that we don't have to cook or just sit down and play with the kids. You will find your inspiration again, do an easy project that doesn't take long but has a big ta da feeling at the end, just keep doing what you can.
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Post by glowworm on Jul 21, 2008 12:34:25 GMT -5
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cavylady
New Member
Joined: June 2008
Posts: 68
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Post by cavylady on Jul 21, 2008 13:03:02 GMT -5
Well, she had breakfast, and we cleaned some pet areas together. I've got a load of dishes going, and she's starting a craft project, so I'm off to soak in the shower before picking up my son.
I feel a teeny bit better. I guess this is one of those days where not much is gong to happen stepping out of squalor-wise, but I still feel sorta weepy or overwhelmed.
Thanks for the support.
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Post by crazycatlady on Jul 21, 2008 19:30:39 GMT -5
Some days it seems like I realize that cleaning up just really isn't very fun! But when I do what you did, and just manage the basics of feeding us and dishes...it gets better. You have made tremendous progress, and I'm very proud of all your hard work!  |
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