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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 8, 2012 13:36:55 GMT -5
"The thing about family disasters is that you never have to wait long before the next one puts the previous one into perspective."--Robert Brault
"Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry."--Bill Cosby
"Two things I dislike about my granddaughter--when she won't take her afternoon nap, and when she won't let me take mine."--Gene Perret
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 9, 2012 1:37:59 GMT -5
“Never judge someone by their relatives.”--Charles Martin, Chasing Fireflies
"My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after her side of the family."--Jeff Foxworthy
"Sisters never quite forgive each other for what happened when they were five."--Pam Brown
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 10, 2012 0:25:01 GMT -5
“When your mother asks, "Do you want a piece of advice?" it's a mere formality. It doesn't matter if you answer yes or no. You're going to get it anyway.”--Erma Bombeck
"Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.”--Bill Cosby
"I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry."--Rita Rudner
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Post by ramatama on Oct 10, 2012 8:53:35 GMT -5
“In the investigation of a neurotic style of life, we must always suspect an opponent, and note who suffers most because of the patient's condition. Usually this is a member of the family.”
Alfred Adler (Austrian psychiatrist whose influential system of individual psychology introduced the term inferiority feeling, later widely and often inaccurately called inferiority complex, 1870-1937)
“One of life's greatest mysteries is how the boy who wasn't good enough to marry your daughter can be the father of the smartest grandchild in the world.”
“It's funny that those things your kids did that got on your nerves seem so cute when your grandchildren do them”
“Treat your family like friends and your friends like family.”
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 11, 2012 13:48:07 GMT -5
 Hi ramatama! Thank you so much for all the great quotes on family! (And I'd love to change the term inferiority complex to something like the stupidity quotient, as in "That person is a stupid jerk for trying to make me feel as if I'm less than or not as good as they are."  I'll work on coming up with a catchier phrase.)
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 11, 2012 13:53:36 GMT -5
"Watching your daughter being collected by her date feels like handing over a million dollar Stradivarius to a gorilla.”--Jim Bishop
“The easiest way to teach children the value of money is to borrow some from them."--Unknown
"I told my mother-in-law that my house was her house, and she said, 'Get the h*ll off my property.'"--Joan Rivers
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 12, 2012 0:07:46 GMT -5
"People are pretty forgiving when it comes to other people's families. The only family that ever horrifies you is your own."--Doug Coupland
“If you don't understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child.”--Linda Sunshine
"Little League baseball is a very good thing because it keeps the parents off the streets."--Yogi Berra
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 13, 2012 0:51:04 GMT -5
"The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions."--Robert Brault
"You know your children are growing up when they stop asking you where they came from and refuse to tell you where they're going."--P.J. O'Rourke
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Post by ramatama on Oct 13, 2012 8:47:22 GMT -5
Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother. --Oprah Winfrey
Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago. --Erma Bombeck
No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. --Florida Scott-Maxwell
Whenever I'm with my mother, I feel as though I have to spend the whole time avoiding land mines. --Amy Tan, The Kitchen God's Wife
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Post by dayeanu on Oct 13, 2012 8:58:01 GMT -5
Ramatama: "Thanks to my mother, not a single cardboard box has found its way back into society. We receive gifts in boxes from stores that went out of business twenty years ago." --Erma Bombeck
I love this. We do this!
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Post by Di on Oct 13, 2012 11:19:06 GMT -5
There was a wonderful dept store in town that was named Gayfer's. It went out of business at least 20 years ago. I had to give a birthday gift last week and found myself wrapping it in a Gayfer's box. Talk about humor hitting home.....
Does it make it worse or better that I don't think that the box had ever been used before?
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 14, 2012 13:54:42 GMT -5
Thank you for the great quotes, ramatama--especially that hilarious one about old boxes from Erma Bombeck!  That one is so, so true in my family as well. When I was a child, I would get Christmas and birthday presents in boxes from stores that had gone out of business before I was born.  (And Di, if the box was that old and had never been used, just look at it this way: Not only did you give the person a birthday gift, you gave it to them in a pristine antique box! ) |
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 14, 2012 14:02:10 GMT -5
"A family vacation is one where you arrive with five bags, four kids and seven 'I-thought-you-packed-its.'"--Ivern Ball
"It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snowblower or vacuum cleaner."--Ben Bergor
"On the seventh day God rested. His grandchildren must have been out of town."--Gene Perret
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 15, 2012 1:08:00 GMT -5
"Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”--George Burns
"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."--Groucho Marx
"I'm going to stop punishing my children by saying, 'Never mind! I'll do it myself.'”--Erma Bombeck
"A man with a hump-backed uncle mustn't make fun of another man's cross-eyed aunt."--Mark Twain
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Oct 16, 2012 3:11:51 GMT -5
"Home, nowadays, is a place where part of the family waits till the rest of the family brings the car back."--Earl Wilson
"Each generation has been an education for us in different ways. The first child-with-bloody-nose was rushed to the emergency room. The fifth child-with-bloody-nose was told to go to the yard immediately and stop bleeding on the carpet."--Art Linkletter
"If your baby is 'beautiful and perfect, never cries or fusses, sleeps on schedule and burps on demand, an angel all the time,' you're the grandma."--Teresa Bloomingdale
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