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Post by onwardandupward on Jun 20, 2010 21:34:11 GMT -5
As some of you may already know, I am currently in maintenance mode. Some of you may also know that I live on a pretty strict budget due to my daughter making the high school cheer team, which is pretty expensive to participate in.
For a few years now, there have been several things on my wish list. One is new area rugs for the living room, dining room and runners for the hall. Another is flatware. I have been wanting new flatware for years. Not the flimsy cheap stuff, but some decent stainless that is a nice weight and quality. I have also wanted curtain rods and curtains every since I moved into this apartment two years ago. There are 5 windows in the living/dining area and one window in each bedroom. I have also wanted a decent set of knives.
Well, I came into some unexpected money two weeks ago. Not a ton, but a couple of thousand dollars. Enough to buy the things I have been wanting for years.
So, imagine my surprise when I went shopping, and found that I am having a lot of trouble buying anything. Huh? ME? Trouble finding something to bring home? Perplexing.
Then I thought about it some more and it dawned on me that because of all of the culling I have done over the past few years, I have become very particular about what to bring into my home. In the past, the money would have burned a hole in my pocket until I rushed out and made quick selections. Now, however, I am in a different place when it comes to "stuff."
So far, I have purchased runners for the halls (found a sale and spent a grand total of $36). I have shopped at about 5 stores for flatware and have seen some that is "okay" but I am not in love with anything yet. Same goes for rugs. I have shopped at several stores but haven't fallen in love with anything yet. As for the curtains, I want to decide on rugs before curtains. I did purchase one expensive knife (it was $35) but I wanted to try it out before buying a whole set.
I see this as evidence of a major shift in my behavior. I am not going to rush the process. When I find rugs and flatware I love, I will get them. Then I will end up with things I want to show off and take care of and hopefully, live with for the rest of my life.
On my shopping trips looking for these things, I have picked up one or two things for the kitchen. 4 small glass storage containers with snap on lids, a microwave bacon plate and a small casserole dish. That's it. My criteria for what can come home with me has changed dramatically.
What do you think? Do you agree that this is a good sign?
Onward
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Post by sleepymom on Jun 20, 2010 21:42:20 GMT -5
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Post by moggyfan on Jun 20, 2010 21:54:07 GMT -5
Oh Onward, I am so there with you!
In fact, just today I went to Pier One looking for three things: a reed diffuser, a couple of throw pillows and a tray. I ended up buying only the first item because none of the pillows or trays seemed exactly what I wanted, so I decided to look around some more.
I can hardly believe I have become this picky about what I buy and bring home, but I absolutely have. And YES, I definitely think it is a good thing, a sign of real progress. I no longer want a bunch of sort-of-junky-not-really-what-I-wanted stuff populating my hard-won clean and clutter-free rooms.
Also, in the long run, I think this approach saves money--in the past I probably would have purchased a couple pillows I didn't really like or want and then been dissatisfied and so purchased some more, etc. etc. I find that by waiting till I find what I really want, I only have to spend the money once.
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hopehope
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Post by hopehope on Jun 20, 2010 21:59:44 GMT -5
really good.
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Post by blessedapt on Jun 20, 2010 22:05:10 GMT -5
Excellent!!!
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MiSC
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Post by MiSC on Jun 20, 2010 22:32:35 GMT -5
I'm so envious! You're in exactly the place I want to be in someday. I want nothing in this house that I'm not in love with. Someday.  YAY YOU!! |
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Post by dtesposito on Jun 20, 2010 23:06:36 GMT -5
OMG--I love this line. When I think of the areas of saved stuff that I have yet to clear out, I have stuff there I love, stuff I like, stuff I'm neutral about, and stuff I don't even like but at some point I still thought I'd "need" it some day.
I am going to think about this concept the next time I'm clearing an area out and use it to measure what I'm keeping.
Diane
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i_believe
New Member
Be here now~
Joined: May 2010
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Post by i_believe on Jun 20, 2010 23:24:44 GMT -5
Onward, that is wonderful! So glad you have the money to finally get what you've been wanting for so long~ AND that you have had a change in attitude because of your change in behavior. I've read that that can happen-- first comes the new behavior and then the attitude will follow, rather than vice versa. Thanks very much for sharing your victory over "the stuff" with us; it gives me as a newbie and awful lot of hope!!  TYG |
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Post by onwardandupward on Jun 21, 2010 1:20:49 GMT -5
 Thanks everyone! I love MiSC's line, too. It reminded me of something I read in one of my favorite books, "The Shell Seekers," by Rosamunde Pilcher. One of the characters uses the following William Morris quote, "Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful." I am sure I have seen that quoted here before, too. And I have thought those words seemed true. But I didn't really FEEL what they mean until recently. I think this is because I had so much stuff before that I thought I needed or thought I loved. But the bar has been raised considerably as to my criteria for what is useful and what is loved. What a journey. Onward
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Post by onwardandupward on Jun 21, 2010 1:29:21 GMT -5
Also, in the long run, I think this approach saves money--in the past I probably would have purchased a couple pillows I didn't really like or want and then been dissatisfied and so purchased some more, etc. etc. I find that by waiting till I find what I really want, I only have to spend the money once. Moggy, I agree with you. I can't tell you the amount of money I have wasted over the years buying things I thought would make me happy, only to have them ruined by neglect, or to decide the next year that I didn't really like it after all. This is an excellent point. Thanks for brining it to my attention. Onward |
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Post by lizzie on Jun 21, 2010 4:47:41 GMT -5
Yes, it is a fabulous sign of how things have changed within you! Now you can make choices about what you REALLY want, because you have created an environment which fits and suits you so much better. What a treat for you to have come into this money at a time when it has so much value for you, as well! Thank you for sharing this, it is very thought provoking, regards. Lizzie
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MiSC
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Post by MiSC on Jun 21, 2010 8:19:00 GMT -5
OMG--I love this line. When I think of the areas of saved stuff that I have yet to clear out, I have stuff there I love, stuff I like, stuff I'm neutral about, and stuff I don't even like but at some point I still thought I'd "need" it some day. I am going to think about this concept the next time I'm clearing an area out and use it to measure what I'm keeping. Diane Thanks everyone! I love MiSC's line, too. It reminded me of something I read in one of my favorite books, "The Shell Seekers," by Rosamunde Pilcher. One of the characters uses the following William Morris quote, "Have nothing in your house that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful." I am sure I have seen that quoted here before, too. And I have thought those words seemed true. But I didn't really FEEL what they mean until recently. I think this is because I had so much stuff before that I thought I needed or thought I loved. But the bar has been raised considerably as to my criteria for what is useful and what is loved. What a journey. Onward Here's where that came from: We have some dear, dear friends who've worked hard on getting their home exactly the way they want it. It's a great house, but they wanted to update the kitchen, and then the bathrooms, and then they decided they wanted to bite the bullet and add an entirely new wing. They know they're going to be in that house for the duration, and they want it to be THEIR house. Exactly what THEY want. The house reflects their personalities in fantastic ways. The exterior is pure "them," and when you get inside, it's even more "them." It's an ecclectic blend of designs and colors, and it all works beautifully. I clearly remember asking her how they got all that mix of things to work so amazingly well, and that's when she told me that there's nothing in their house that they don't love. They never bring anything into their house that isn't loved by both of them. She said that if you love everything in your house, then not only is it a reflection of your personality, it just plain "works." If you think about it, there's no other way it could be. I've always been drawn to ecclectic designs and spaces, and now I have the secret to making it work. |
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Post by Arid on Jun 21, 2010 14:48:05 GMT -5
Oh, MiSC--I have to laugh!! What you have described is a real estate agent's worst nightmare!!! They HATE for a house to have a distinct "personality." They want everything to be "neutral" so that it will appeal to the greatest number of people.
I, on the other hand, LOVE houses with personalitly. Besides, as I have mentioned before at this site, one of the (many!) things that attracted me to our current house was that the family who lived here had many of the same types of furniture, knickknacks, pictures, etc. that we did. That told me that our things would go well in this house, too.
Also, many years ago, I read in a "house beautiful" type magazine, that if one loves everything in a room, it will "work" well together, no matter if you are mixing plaids, stripes, and/or polka dots!!!
Arid
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Post by messymimi on Jun 21, 2010 14:56:04 GMT -5
Wow, Onward. This is a great goal to work toward. To never buy anything you don't love, and to get rid of the stuff you have that you don't love.
Thank you, and congratulations.
messymimi
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Post by shopgirl on Jun 21, 2010 15:01:10 GMT -5
Miss Onwardandupward, this is huge. This is how rich people live. We poor folks are the ones dragging home giant Target bags. The truly rich people are taking years to consider the value of something, then coming home from Sotheby's with a single Renoir painting.
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