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Post by shopgirl on Jul 22, 2009 0:34:11 GMT -5
Our beautiful little apartment that we moved into 3 years ago is starting to fill up. I've bought too many new electronics. I should NOT work in an electronics store.
Also I haven't unpacked from a trip I took in May, actually I did unpack, but left everything strewn around the floor of my guest bedroom. Even stuff I hate I want to keep.
My living room cabinets are full of LPs and CDs, and two stereos, one of which isn't even hooked up since last December when I took it all down to have the carpet cleaners in. The LPs are in great shape, always been stored indoors and dry, but wow, cardboard starts to smell funky when it gets old. The LPs make me sad, but I cannot get rid of them. I'm about ready to shrinkwrap all the old LPs and put them out in the garage.
Oh, the garage. Another out-of-control place. No organization at all, and I was always good about the garage in other places. And I am so immobilized I cannot even throw away a T-Shirt. I don't even want to walk into the garage, much less go out there and go through everything and organize it.
Before we moved here, I got rid of 1,500 pounds of stuff to Goodwill and trash in 2 months. Now I am so overwhelmed and sad and blue, I cannot even believe that was ME, that motivated person in 2006.
I feel like I should at least throw away a shipping carton or something from the floor of the bedroom, but then I go in there, look at it, and I'm all "later." Weeks and weeks of it, and it's getting worse. And I KNOW how to stop the madness but I'm not doing it. Like watching a movie or something, I feel detached from the scene in my own rooms. Just watching it pile up, walking in and glancing at it, and then doing nothing. Just so tired.
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Post by flylady on Jul 22, 2009 0:44:52 GMT -5
Welcome You have come to the right place! Can you start with something? Could you get a small plastic bag and fill it with 10 items and toss it out? I know how you feel about being tired, I suffer from that too, and people sometimes can't understand that. But I do I am a big believer in taking little steps to achieve your goal, I just had a panic clean up and threw everything into the bedrooms, now I can't walk in my bedrooms! Luckily the kids is ok. I do not recommend trying to do it all at once, as it's too much stress and worry. I am fairly new to this board as well, and I find reading some old threads helped me, as well as making me realise, hey I am not the only one in my situation, there are other people that know what I am going through. Take it one day at a time, and you will get there!
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Post by shopgirl on Jul 22, 2009 1:12:25 GMT -5
Thanks for your warm welcome, Miss FlyLady. I'm actually kind of an old timer here, but I've been neat and tidy and MIA from these forums for the past couple years. Are you the famous FlyLady of the feather duster/clean your sink website?
Yep, yep, and yep. I agree with everything you say. This is a wonderful forum. The women here helped me so much in my dark years when I lived back east. I thought I was "cured" when I moved to California. Everything stayed neat and tidy for 2 years. Now it's going downhill fast, and it's like I'm watching someone else's house and I cannot lift a finger to stop the avalanche. One day of inactivity turns into one week... one month... of nothing getting done, all in slow motion.
The trash is being taken out, the dishes and laundry are being done, the mail is being answered, I'm keeping up with the daily stuff... but there are piles. Boxes and stuff. It's closing in on me. I have a room I cannot walk in.
Little Ninja: I just last week put away my big box O tax stuff from April. I thought of you, of course. Still haven't shredded 1998, though. That's in a pile over there in the kitchen.
I guess I'm just feeling a little blue this summer. Throwing away some stuff would make me feel better, I know. Just too blue to do it.
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Post by Peach on Jul 22, 2009 1:29:53 GMT -5
Hi Shopgirl Like FlyLady, I am also new to this wonderful community. YOU ARE NOT ALONE. Each and everyone of us understands what you are going through. We have all had the exact same experience. Another thing many of us have in common is chronic, deep depression. You sound depressed. Have you talked about this with your doctor? Depression can make you extraordinarily tired, exhausted and fatigued, in addition to providing you with a dismal outlook on your surroundings. Make an appointment TODAY with your doctor. Explain how you are feeling - be totally honest. Ask him/her for medication. Clinical depression must be treated with medication. Your doctor will probably also have you tested for other causes of tiredness, such as anemia, Lymes Disease, etc. Please do this NOW. It is hard, I know. But, that is a very important next step. We are glad you are with us!
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Post by Little_Ninja on Jul 22, 2009 7:52:25 GMT -5
Little Ninja: I just last week put away my big box O tax stuff from April. I thought of you, of course. Still haven't shredded 1998, though. That's in a pile over there in the kitchen. Hi shopgirl! Welcome back! I think of you every tax season too! I'm getting better at it...the last two years I've mailed in my taxes 2-to-4 weeks before the deadline. I've never shredded any of my tax stuff. (I have a hard enough time filing it in my filing cabinet.) Take it easy on yourself. Something's going on and you need to sort your thoughts out. I'm at the point where every little bit helps, so I welcome structured procrastination to do something/anything other than what I originally set out to do. Keep posting! Little_Ninja
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Post by gettingsomewhere on Jul 22, 2009 8:04:46 GMT -5
Hi there Shopgirl, welcome. If you can manage it, pop into the chat room. Even if you dont feel like starting now, it's a nice place to visit. Hope to see you there.
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Post by serenitynow on Jul 22, 2009 10:27:14 GMT -5
<<<shopgirl>>> I totally relate to your feelings. Hang in there,friend. serenitynow
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Post by sunshineshouse on Jul 22, 2009 11:37:14 GMT -5
Hi Shopgirl,
Welcome back! Trash, dishes, laundry, mail - you are keeping up with all of that? I think that is great! One of these days I know you are going to grab one or two of those shipping cartons and bring it out with the trash. Maybe pick up a few of those items from your trip in May and toss them in with the laundry.
In any case, I'm glad you are back!
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Post by messymimi on Jul 22, 2009 11:37:40 GMT -5
Good to have you here, ShopGirl !
The paralysis of analysis. I know it well. I fight it daily. Thinking, knowing what to do, analyzing the best way to do it, doing nothing.
I finally figured out that if something is worth doing, it is worth doing badly. So I start, and as I practice whatever it is, I get better at it.
That even includes taking out one piece of paper at a time.
You got there before, you can again.
I agree that you might want to be screened for depression. It makes the work harder.
I'm looking forward to hearing about your progress.
messymimi
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sarthbur
New Member
Joined: August 2008
Posts: 34
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Post by sarthbur on Jul 22, 2009 11:54:39 GMT -5
Shopgirl, I agree that you should talk to your doctor. You sound like I felt in my dark days--depression is a beast to fight on your own. There have been days that I decided to pick up one piece of trash. I would decide I was tired of looking at that McDonalds cup, for example. That was the only thing I was going to pick up. But by golly, that dang cup was going. Sometimes that would motivate me to pick up more. Sometimes not. But I picked up one piece of trash that day and it always made me feel better. "if something is worth doing, it's worth doing badly" Man, there's power in those words... Glad you are here!
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Post by theroyaldump on Jul 22, 2009 15:25:33 GMT -5
Hi shopgirl and welcome! Motivation is a tuffy for me. I can envision my livingroom the way I want it. I want it the way it used to be in the worst way but doing the work to get it there is hard. I am facing two years (therabouts) of junk and trash so I know it will not go away overnight. I was OK with that.
Until my A/C broke. I dealt with the heat until it got to be 103 INSIDE on a daily basis. I asked my fiance for a place to stay while I got the place in order for a repairman. I have been purging stuff on a near daily basis for almost 4 weeks. Still not enough gone to even get to the A/C unit. My fiance has no idea of the volume so he thinks I am playing around all day. He has offered to help but I am unable to bring myself to letting him see this. So I hear from him - on a daily basis - You are almost done aren't you? And through gritted teeth I say no and he gives me this look as if to say What the he!! you been doing!My stress level is way beyond its limit as I simply cannot work any faster than I am. BUT there are days I wanna say the heck with it and no matter what I just can't go back to digging into the mountains of stuff. Comes to the motavation or rather the lack of it. I think I would be OK if I didn't have the fiance pushing me to get it done. Sigh ... you are not alone!
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sloth
New Member
Joined: July 2009
Posts: 6
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Post by sloth on Jul 22, 2009 18:21:59 GMT -5
Shopgirl, we're watching the same movie. I have until 16th August (visit) to do something that doesn't entail adding to the binbags in the loft. I am going to drink tea and try to pick 10 things up thanks FL. My daughter brought me a dead moth today....that can't be good. Usually the terror of being 'found out' and the Can't have anyone over (when I am several playdates/months behind) guilt me into action but - got nothin'. Take care SG I agree this film sucks (the horror! the horror!) I have to do something now.....i'm just reminded of an old Yellow pages advert ''You don't want to see what they've done to the bathroom...'' (for non-Brits it was a squalid bloke who pretended he'd been burgled as opposed to admitting it was all his normal mess strewn around). Bit like when I pretended to the fire brigade I'd just moved in...
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Post by gottaproblem on Jul 23, 2009 1:18:17 GMT -5
SG I hope it helps to know you are not alone. Sloth: about the fire brigade story
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Post by shopgirl on Jul 23, 2009 4:01:49 GMT -5
Awww, you girls are great, as always. Just reading your encouragements makes me smile.
Miss Peach, Miss Sarthblur-- I did go for medical screening for my mean blues last winter, they found I had a hormone deficiency. Good old menopause. That's all taken care of now with great estrogen and progesterone pills which seem like a lifesaver to me. I have been feeling blue because of family stuff, my dear grandma passed away a year ago and I took her loss very hard. I still think of her every day. And now I feel bad seeing my wonderful pretty mother grow older and seemingly smaller each time I see her. I returned from visiting her in the midwest this spring, and that's the trip I haven't unpacked from yet. I suspect the midwest trip is what I haven't recovered from, and it's showing in my house. Strange, because I love being with my mom more than any person, she's always been my best friend, but it makes me sad, too.
My dear friend Little Ninja! I am so happy to see you again. I think of you and your sweet dogs and your lovely painting/redecorating projects often. That beautiful bedroom furniture that is to die for! Taxes: 2-4 weeks before deadline?!?! This year I was lucky to get them in 2 HOURS before deadline. Driving to the main post office at the county seat at 10pm, it's madness. You are an inspiration. I will try harder to get them filed sooner next year, we will have a race again!
Miss MessyMimi-- You are a wise sage indeed: "If something is worth doing, it is worth doing badly." Simply brilliant! That should be embroidered onto a pillow or something, along with my own "No good deed goes unpunished." Of course I wouldn't be the one to do any pillow embroidering; I would buy the pillow and the embroidery floss and promptly deposit those supplies, still in their Jo-Ann Fabrics plastic bag, in my spare bedroom.
Miss Sloth, Miss Gottaproblem, glad to hear I'm not the only one in this weird theater watching this house-avalanche movie.
Today I did 3 loads of laundry, fresh sheets and mattress pad on the bed, fresh towels in the bath. I felt ambitious! Then I looked in my spare bedroom, the idea was to remove one thing. A shipping carton! Or a plastic bag! A book to donate! Anything! But it seemed too complicated, it literally sucks the air out of my lungs just to look at the mess. I promptly turned around and shut the door behind me. Later.
Thank you again for all your kind and encouraging replies. Tomorrow is another day.
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Post by shopgirl on Jul 23, 2009 4:20:22 GMT -5
Little Ninja, the Structured Procrastination article is a brilliant manifesto!
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