hopehope
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Sept 17, 2008 22:09:18 GMT -5
got out 3 black bags, 2 stuffed shopping bags and several -- 3? -- smaller bags. plus the food garbage. Plus, a male mannekin with the words "use only in case of emergency" scribbled on his chest. found it that way when I moved into the apartment -- 18? years ago...
went to cop shop and got the form I need to get copy of police report for harasssment by neighbor who dropped the dime on me (don't I sound like a moll?)
went to service -- ok, half of it. meditated and did lesson. checked and answered email. ate healthy -ish things. cleaned my nails.
and you?
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Post by heylady1 on Sept 17, 2008 22:20:17 GMT -5
Yes, yes you do!! I'm glad you're feeling better today!!!
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Post by zinnia on Sept 17, 2008 22:27:08 GMT -5
Hurray for hopehope!!
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Post by pegasus48 on Sept 17, 2008 23:46:25 GMT -5
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Post by CourageouslyLion SeeksSerenity on Sept 18, 2008 2:51:04 GMT -5
Do you have a lawyer helping you at this point? I am not clear on where you are as far as dealing with the landlord's issues. Keep us informed please. Hi hopehope! I am wondering the same thing. I would encourage you to keep plugging away at the mass of stuff (regardless of when/if inspection is looming). You've done so much already, and I know you WILL continue succeeding. Also, just curious, what is the significance of the number in the thread title (#246) ? -
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Post by messymimi on Sept 18, 2008 18:18:46 GMT -5
Please keep checking in, hopehope.
You are in my prayers each day.
messymimi
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hopehope
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Sept 18, 2008 20:51:17 GMT -5
ok, in no particular order -- 246 was just a number I pulled out of the air, because i posted a different thread called 'today' before. and who knows -- maybe even prior to that? I never had a lawyer working for me. there is a clinic where you can speak to a lawyer -- there is a good one there, and I spoke to him for 2 minutes last week. he is the one who told the other guy there -- also a lawyer, in a different position than he -- to see about getting me a grant to get clean up help. and that second guy was the one who put the fear of God into me -- figuratively speaking -- by saying I would have to sign something saying they could take everything. froze me up for four days. not completely, but enough. I will return to them and ask them to get that ball rolling. and I will work out the details as i am able. in the meantime, i've been applying to modest needs on my own -- the third time's the charm, they now want extra documentation and it sounds more -- hopeful -- one of the things they want -- and soon -- is a copy of my lease -- which I brought with me to one of the lawyer appointments when they wouldn't really see me -- and didn't need or look at it. and it's gone missing. I haven't seen it and things are in a state. apropos of which -- the light in my front hallway -- declutter central -- has gone out -- not burned out, gone out -- I don't know if it's just being hinky or if it's a fuse. I have -- tada -- gone and bought the right size batteries for a flashlight I had hanging around -- and got a free pack of double a's to go with -- and it works. I never have betteries for flashlights. preparatory to maybe looking in the fuse box. I do have fuses. at least one of the sizes. not the other, I don't think. and I saved a gooseneck? light I was going to toss, in case I can get its cord to reach an extension plug so I can see in the front hallway. critical. lioness -- thank you for telling me to keep on plugging away. it is a drop in the bucket, but I feel it's important. apropos of that -- I put an ad on craigslist domestic for mission of mercy -- woman, drowning in stuff, needs reliable, non-shaming help cleaning and tossing. emergency. and I've gotten lots of responses -- ranging from the fifty dollar an hour types to the fifty dollars for six hours. ( my preference.) Input requested - is this where I ask everyone for references --they'll be in my home, right? -- or just go with the gut? I tried hiring someone I know but she can only do 3 hours -- and I think it's on a day when I might not be free. i will post here later as to what i've done today -- have to go... thank you all
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Post by moggyfan on Sept 18, 2008 22:10:14 GMT -5
Hey hopehope--I hired someone from craigslist when I was at my lowest/worst squalor ever. I just went with my gut, as I knew I was not going to be leaving her alone in my house.
She helped me for one weekend (6 hours each on Saturday and Sunday) and I could not **believe** how much we got done. It was a complete turning point for me. That was 3 years ago. I have never looked back--somehow having that help to do the very worst of it inspired me to keep going and totally declutter and clean.
It was a miracle!
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Post by heylady1 on Sept 18, 2008 23:31:30 GMT -5
I would go with your gut too.....references are no guarantee anyway. I am glad you're consulting with a lawyer even if it's only a few minutes at a time. At least they can point you in the right direction!! I sure hope you can find your copy of the lease too!!
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hopehope
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Sept 19, 2008 0:33:03 GMT -5
mog -- what did you pay her? boy -- you wouldn't believe the responses -- the last one -- from someone calling himself vico69 -- was just one word -- massage? ?? wtf? anyway -- I have good gut on one person -- maybe allright on three -- but I can't pay tons -- and I'm kind of a sitting duck -- nothing really works in my house -- including the front door knob -- not a good idea to have people know that.-- don't even have a phone to call for help. but I have good gut on this one lady. anyway -- today was a bad day cried twice. slept on and off a lot of the day. have been sick and exhausted. still had yesterday's bad headache. three aspirin version (better now) -- thought about the parents I had til I was eleven -- who expected goood of me and I thought were behind me -- then -- when I was 11, they changed. same bodies -- different people. I miss those people, those parents. I never saw them again. just talked to my mother the other night on the phone -- thousands of miles away. haven't spoken to her in a couple of years, maybe. she has no short term memory. oh my. maybe that added to it. didn't feel i was getting much done. didn't have the getupandgo. soldiered on a little anyway. and, in the end -- I went to the bathroom of doom -- one of the two forbidden rooms -- and addresssed a necessary but scary process. got a beginning chunk of it done. especially -- there was one point when I was going back to my house, and I knew I could go in and get another part taken out -- and i Just Didn't Want To DO It. i knew, if I did, it would be triumphing over a fear and I would feel so good. I DID IT. yay. so -- this has been on my list all the time since the beginning, and I got it started. at last. oooouuff. part deux ou trois ou quinze? anyway -- there's no light in my front hall -- I think it's the circuit -- fuse thing. took all apart in the dark -- but I don't have that size -- so -- anyway -- resourcefulness -- I got a 20 v fuse. whether it turns out to be the right size or not I don't know... they say the base varies -- but it's closer than I was. and the flashlight punked out on me in seconds. couldn't get it to go again -- so I found another, better flashlight that I had -- and knew where it was -- and all is well. and -- modest needs sounds more hopeful -- I guess I said that before? which has helped my inner esprit a lot. as have the responses to my ad. too bad I can't really afford to hire -- but I can't afford not to!
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Post by moggyfan on Sept 19, 2008 0:50:04 GMT -5
Hi HH, I paid her $30/hour x 12 hours = $360 total, but I think I ended up giving her an extra $40, so $400.
BUT, I think I might've been able to offer her less (she wasn't a "pro"). She probably would've taken $25 or even $20, but I had the money and she worked her heart out. She helped me sooooooo much!
She came every 6 weeks or so for about another year, and then kind of dropped out of sight. But she called a couple of weeks ago (needed extra $ again I think!), and she came last Saturday for a few hours. It was great to see her! I hope we'll get back into a routine where she comes once in awhile again.
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hopehope
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 3,815
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Post by hopehope on Sept 19, 2008 17:14:32 GMT -5
quick quick quick post -- i went into the bathroom of D. (making an effort to use the active voice here) -- again -- and dealt with what I thought was all the containers. turns out there are two more in different colored, or rather uncolored containers, but no matter. for another time. I decanted all the broken ones, and bagged and moved all the unbroken ones; got brokens black bagged and OUT. BIG SMILE. and a bag of instant trash I put together there. the other stuff is bagged and laned outside the b. door, ready to go. AND THEN I CLEANED THE SINK. Awe. Too big for smiles. I hadn't known how much this was weighing on my heart. whew. I've left out the disasters -- the bag that went upside down while I was sink-polishing and bragging to myself -- drooling smelly water whereever -- and so on. still. and I started to take stuff off the top of the wicker thing -- looking harder than I thought. I am much energized by facing a fear...
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Post by razy on Sept 19, 2008 17:38:05 GMT -5
Great work Hopehope!!!!
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Post by moonglow on Sept 19, 2008 18:07:22 GMT -5
Good going hopehope, you give me great HOPE!!!
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Post by heylady1 on Sept 19, 2008 19:28:15 GMT -5
It's wonderful that you are facing your fears Hopehope!! You're doing so good!! You certainly don't have to answer if you don't want to but I wondered if your parents had an accident when you were 11 that changed their personalities?? If I am being too nosey just tell me to shut up and please don't be offended by my question okay??
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