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Post by tinymews on Dec 23, 2009 20:50:50 GMT -5
So, I finally got up the courage to post pictures of my house and had a huge shock when I actually saw them. I've gotten so used to the condition of my environment, but looking at it as photos really makes things more noticable. It's really awful and I'm ashamed to see the mess I've created. How could I not notice how bad things really are? What must the few family members who have been up there think about me for living this way? I had always told myself it wasn't as bad as the images I'd seen of "hoarders". I thought I'd made progress in realizing and accepting that I have a problem; however, seeing things in "black and white" has really shocked & frightened me.
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Post by Peach on Dec 23, 2009 21:24:24 GMT -5
Don't be frightened TinyMews. You are not alone. You have lots of nice things. Your rabbit and hubby's large white bird (cockatoo?) are beautiful. I once had a bird room similar to yours and hubby's. It was all consuming trying to keep it clean. Nothing else ever got cleaned in the house because I keep saying to myself: "the birds need cleaning first." However, cleaning of that one room was an all day project that would leave either me or DH exhausted and dirty from head to toe. Also in pain and achy as we got older. After 20-30 years, I made the difficult decision in 2008 to rehome them. We all deserved a better life -- me, DH and, most of all, the birds. I've written about my experience here takeonestepatatime.proboards.com/index.cgi?board=general&action=display&thread=6993#84040 Please ask your DH to read it. My biggest roadblock to overall cleaning was not admitting to myself that I could no longer provide properly for my beloved parrots. There are solutions. You just have to take each area of your apartment and break it down into smaller pieces. Don't look at it as a whole. That is what is frightening and shocking.
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Post by lettinggo on Dec 25, 2009 11:58:20 GMT -5
TinyMews, I was exactly where you are, two years ago! I just lived with it, and although my eyes saw it, there was no *connection* to emotions or thought or anything. It just *was*.
Although I knew, intellectually, that it was bad, because I would not let anyone in my house.
Then I took pictures. I could not believe it. I had thought it was "not that bad", too. But those pictures really helped me start working. And now my house is mostly clutter and squalor free.
I remember thinking I was almost done, and being really proud, and then taking more pictures. Again, it took those pictures to show me the truth.
Now I let people in all the time. And I am not filled with shame.
Except about one thing. Because no one ever came in the house, my cats were never allowed the chance to get socialized with other people, and they are terrified of people.
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Post by howardsgirlfriend on Dec 25, 2009 13:13:55 GMT -5
Nice to have you here, Tinymews! From looking at your photos, it seems as though once you get the pet mess under control, the rest will be easy.
DH and I had as many as 4 dogs and 5 cats, and I had to make it my all-consuming hobby to clean up after them. We're now down to 2 cats and 4 dogs, none of them chronically ill, so I now take about 15-30 minutes a day and one load of laundry every other day to keep ahead of it. Oh yeah, and vacuuming every other day. Took me about 6 months (and having our carpet replaced with vinyl) to get the pet mess under control.
Lately, my dogs figured out how to raid the refrigerator, so we had a whole new round of trying to outthink them.
You can do this, and make everyone's lives better.
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Post by CaringFriend on Dec 26, 2009 2:37:49 GMT -5
Lately, my dogs figured out how to raid the refrigerator, so we had a whole new round of trying to outthink them. !!!!!!!
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