MiSC
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 1,611
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Post by MiSC on Apr 2, 2010 20:30:03 GMT -5
Y'all! Slow down! This does not have to divide anyone from anyone, anywhere, for any reason, at any time. I SCREWED UP. That's it. End of story. I screwed up. I screwed up and the mods came to an agreement on what should be done about it. Everything's gonna be fine.
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Apr 2, 2010 22:00:23 GMT -5
MisC, I absolutely love all your cool emoticons.
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Post by disorganizeddragon on Apr 2, 2010 22:32:54 GMT -5
Hi Everyone! Boy this has turned into an interesting thread. I have to say I am a little disappointed that members are throwing their opinions all over the place without actually answering the question that was asked in the first place. The moderators have asked for our help to make decisions regarding what is appropriate and what is not in chat and to discuss options for what would be a suitable reaction to inappropriate behaviour. . . . I am afraid that this issue is dividing the community and I can already see little cliques forming over who was right and who was wrong. THIS IS NOT THE ISSUE AT HAND! The issue is that, regardless of circumstance, a memer was verbally abused, sworn at and made to feel unsafe. A code of common decency and respect for another member was broken and this is what needs to be talked about. I don't believe the mods have behaved in a knee-jerk reaction at all. This is something, as a community, we need to discuss. Catbiscuit xx Hey Catbiscuit! If you read thru the entire thread, you will see that many members did answer the original question Eagle posed concerning our thoughts on rules for Chat. However, as is the case for many threads posted on this board, the conversation simply progressed into discussing other concerns that various members have regarding issues related to chat or posting. Again, this type of evolving dialogue happens on many threads in this forum and is a normal occurrence on this board. Disagreement is also a normal occurrence on this board, but that doesn't mean the community is dividing or sides are being chosen. Yes, we all have some friends here that we may relate to better that we do others, but the overall enviroment of this board seems to be one of support and respect, even if we may not always agree with one another's thoughts or opinions. Yes, there are naturally some heated moments from time to time, but in the end, we will all pull together--just as any large and somewhat dysfunctional family does. MisC is right: Everything's gonna be fine.
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Post by Butterfly on Apr 2, 2010 23:31:36 GMT -5
MisC, I absolutely love all your cool emoticons. Weird; I can't see them. All I get is "[image]"
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MiSC
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 1,611
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Post by MiSC on Apr 2, 2010 23:35:16 GMT -5
MisC, I absolutely love all your cool emoticons. Weird; I can't see them. All I get is "[image]" Can you see the regular SOS smilies?
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Post by sparkle on Apr 3, 2010 0:16:14 GMT -5
Nicely said, MiSC. You're right; it's all gonna to be fine. Big yay on those nice emoticons. Take care.
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Post by Butterfly on Apr 3, 2010 0:49:49 GMT -5
Can you see the regular SOS smilies? Yes, and the ones I use from my photobucket account. These are the first I can't see. I even used the "quote" feature to get the code you use for them and tried to go directly to the gif file but the page wouldn't load. Very weird.
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Post by Celeste on Apr 3, 2010 2:26:47 GMT -5
I even used the "quote" feature to get the code you use for them and tried to go directly to the gif file but the page wouldn't load. Very weird. Hmm. I wonder if you blocked images from millan.net. It DOES set cookies.
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Post by Butterfly on Apr 3, 2010 3:49:06 GMT -5
That may be it. I bet my security settings are preventing my access. Thanks!
ETA: Tried opening millan.net and the page won't load at all. I normally use Firefox but I also tried it with IE and got the same result. It's not a big deal; just the first time I've run across this.
This is the error: Bad Gateway The following error occurred:
A DNS lookup error occurred.
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Post by eagle on Apr 3, 2010 6:52:22 GMT -5
Butterfly, you are not the only one. My security settings don't like Millan.net, either.
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Post by cando on Apr 3, 2010 9:23:31 GMT -5
I've been following this thread but not posted. But, I have to reply to Misc. That was a terrific post! It's time to move on y'all... IMHO. I won't read any more posts on this thread as the situation has been handled and discussed fully. Thank you for posting that post with all those cute emoticons, MISC. And, thank all the mods for all they do to help all of us here and to keep this website running smoothly. CD
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Post by yearning4order on Apr 4, 2010 3:30:03 GMT -5
I was thinking for starters that it's great I wasn't there because it is a nice thing when I'm not involved. Then I had this knee jerk "Oh man I missed it!" and had to chuckle because it's naughty for me to be such a drama queen!
I don't know what happened but hugs to all.
Sometimes I really like some of the traditions in 12 step programs, because they help keep the group safe. Things like recognizing what the primary purpose of a group might be, and that unity is the key to being able to carry out that purpose. This doesn't mean there are no kerfluffles in 12 step programs, of course there are.
But sometimes it's good for me to take some refuge in the fact that my goal *here* is that I desperately needed and still need help to clean my house, and that without this group I couldn't have done it. And that if the goal of the group is to offer aid to others struggling with squalor, and to find support ourselves--things that create more harmony and less confusion are good.
What that means in practical application I don't know. But tonight it's good to be able to hold you all up in unity, love, and support. I remember when I first came here and got into kerfluffles with Misc and DJ and you all have been very gracious with me. So here's to everyone, huzzah!
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Post by mouseanne on Apr 4, 2010 12:32:54 GMT -5
mouseanne's tuppence: Thanks to the Mods! Thanks to the two participants... who worked it out peacefully!! Thanks for all members' comments! Someone mentioned cliques forming... I didn't notice that. May have been a bit of leaning "left-freedom" and "right-tighter moderation"... but no one went way out in left or right field... Also saw no "side-taking". I hope lostNjunk comes back to chat. I also have always enjoyed lilith's comments in the DB, so would enjoy seeing her in chat. I suffer from a quirky sense of humor... sometimes things others think are hilarious... totally leave me clueless... and sometimes my jocularity... is for others... Liked what lozzylulu said about that! Sometimes, I am quiet, just watching the conversation roll.... sometimes I get enthralled, typing away, and sometimes I worry I come on too strong... and would always WANT to be asked, hey, back off a bit... too strong... or monopolizing... I like the instant... help. If a person is blue, we say so, and someone is available to hold hands. if we are being demand resistant... well, i ask to be shoved off my backend... and the others do so. I consider myself a righteous woman, but do continually work on "potty mouth" (which IMHO, sometimes is one of the byproducts of molestation-a kind of "control" issue) that said, I occasionally say cr@p or sh!t about my "piles" or house. I frequently say b!itch... but am INVARIABLY talking about my female dog (which is where the B-word comes from!!!) if i am referring to extreemly difficult people in my life, current or historically, i generally use "barracuda people" or some such. However (not directed at MiSC!!!) my language and comments is never directed AT any members. But some might find me offensive... but I would want to know. Also, we all have "triggers" and HISTORY. Sadly, some have PRESENT also... may have (examples) last weekend been beaten by boyfriend, raped, or had a family death. So, in chat, those topics would seriously hurt or offend a member who has fresh wounds. If someone tells us they are hurting, it may take a few moments for chatters to catch up to the topic change request... but when we are given a minute or two, the topic changes... sometimes not quickly enough, and the requester leaves... As for the yellow light or red light... an IM can be sent quickly between two chatters... or a request for a new room can be set up and anyone wanting to leave the topic at hand can join the new room... or step into the other room which is always there... read this over... it sounds way more critical than i meant it.. that is not my spirit or intent... and these are the things i want to say, so am leaving it for now.
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Post by yearning4order on Apr 4, 2010 13:52:16 GMT -5
Oh regarding swearing: I have a mouth that can peel paint off the walls and am really working hard on it.
Recently I watched The Fantastic Mr. Fox and everyplace that would have had a swear word they instead the word "cuss". I'm going to give it a try. It's probably a good thing for me, since it's much harder to take myself seriously when angry if I blurt out "Holy cuss!"
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MiSC
Banned
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 1,611
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Post by MiSC on Apr 4, 2010 20:46:34 GMT -5
I remember when I first came here and got into kerfluffles with Misc and DJ and you all have been very gracious with me Okay, I give. I'm breaking down and asking you to tell me what it was. I have no memory whatsoever of any kind of trouble. And I mean ZIP. So fill me in. What was our kerfuffle about? (I that word.)
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