|
Post by ohblondie on Jan 23, 2015 14:22:33 GMT -5
dayeanu this makes perfect sense to me!
|
|
|
Post by hiding on Mar 24, 2015 20:13:42 GMT -5
Check out Refasionista's latest. refashionista.net/2015/03/22/spring/#comment-33850She is so amazing. I know. It's dangerous for us to look at her website. We don't need any more encouragement to save all of our old clothes with the idea we will re-fashion them. But it is entertaining to see what this lady does.
|
|
slobovian
New Member
Joined: May 2008
Posts: 77
|
Post by slobovian on Mar 24, 2015 22:41:43 GMT -5
FWIW, I think we can cut ourselves a bit of slack for over shopping, at least in the US. We're constantly bombarded with direct and indirect advertising telling us to BUY BUY BUY. You don't have enough money? No problem. You can put it on a credit card, get 0% financing, or the dreaded "rent to own". Our economy runs on consumption. To go against that trend takes conscious, constant effort.
I read something interesting though. The old saying "Money can't buy happiness" is true and it isn't. What this study found was that when we buy things, we get a temporary rush of good feelings. But if we spend our money on experiences, especially SHARED experiences, we're more satisfied long term because we create memories. So instead of shopping for clothes, maybe we should save our money and go online to plan a trip, especially if we can do it with friends or family.
|
|
|
Post by reb on Mar 24, 2015 23:01:14 GMT -5
hidingHere's what I do to control any urges I have online. Me, it's not so much clothes but I do go bonzo for a good deal on video games! I also browse them. What I do is that Friday is my dedicated "game day" because Good Old Games puts their sales up on that day so I check other sites as well. That way I know all the prices when they come up on sale and don't waste my whole week checking around. I even allow myself to watch the trailer videos, read the reviews etc--but it must be on Friday. Firstly I'd suggest postponing your shopping until you get home. You don't want to jeopardize your job, here. Pick the best shopping day of the week to browse. That's your treat to yourself for not browsing more than you should. Secondly, I don't know what you are using to make purchases but *dump your paypal account*. Paypal has horrid policies anyway. Go and get the cheapest pre-paid credit card you can. You can still purchase from paypal sites, just not from your bank account to paypal which is too big a temptation. Decide how much "treat money" or what you *need* to purchase online, say, $30 per paycheque. Put that on your prepay card when you get paid. That's your money to splurge or buy online. Save money for bigger items on that card too. If you have ten dollars or a bit here and there saved on it, you can buy stuff that comes up that has a time limit on the purchase. In other words, you will also be rewarding yourself for holding back by allowing yourself to buy more expensive or time-limited good deals, later. This way there's no punishment, just a series of rewards based on whatever you can manage to squirrel away on your prepay while training yourself not to buy items that won't be used.
|
|
|
Post by hiding on Mar 24, 2015 23:35:32 GMT -5
I go through my clothes on a fairly regular basis. Every few weeks I take a bag of clothes and a few other items to a thrift store. Some clothing items that I am on the fence about make take 3 or 4 purging cycles before I decide to let them go. This process is slow, but moving forward.
Whereas I still occasionally purchase more clothes, I do it much more thoughtfully. Most importantly, there is more going out than coming in.
OK, all well and good. But here is what I am upset about. I have a lot of great clothes that I can't wear because they are too small. They fit when I bought them about a year ago. I have not been paying enough attention to the weight creeping up until my jeans weren't fitting. I am so disgusted with myself. I'm such an expert of denial. Denial that the house is as cluttered as it is, denial that my weight was increasing.
Of course I always beat myself up for being a *** slob. Then by a set of circumstances, I got to go back to my all time favorite doctor. Right away he wanted to do a complete blood panel. I take thyroid medication for an under-active thyroid. However, the dose I was taking was way under what I should have been taking. Dr said he wondered how I could function at all. He put me on a different type of thyroid med at the proper dosage. In 24 hours I started feeling better. No wonder I was soooo tired all the time. I have lost 6 pounds in a couple of weeks. It's not a lot but at least I'm going in the right direction now.
I thought I had learned the lesson in the past, but I guess I didn't. I always assume that I'm just a *** bum rather than the possibility that there might be something physically wrong with me.
|
|
|
Post by hiding on Mar 24, 2015 23:38:11 GMT -5
Reb,
You must have been writing at the same time I was. Good suggestions, all. I don't have a PayPal account. I think they are stinkers.
|
|
|
Post by reb on Mar 24, 2015 23:55:54 GMT -5
hidingDue to some medication and becoming more disabled I was thin all my life and now I am not. I sooooo understand that feeling of "where the he11 did THIS body come from??!!" I had a certain "style" in clothes and it just won't work anymore. I don't fit in those clothes anymore, either. My New Year's resolution was to buy some clothes that I would feel comfortable in, weighing more, get a haircut and buy some shoes to go with the clothes and stop treating myself badly due to all the things, including weight, that are currently in my life. So I did that. A bit at a time, over months, but I did. Glad to see you got to lose at least a bit of the weight.
|
|
|
Post by perfectionist on Mar 25, 2015 12:52:23 GMT -5
I don't hoard my own clothing (much), mostly because I'm not that happy with my size and I've managed to elevate my own clothing tastes such that I can no longer afford to buy the clothing I want very often (which is one of my strategies to avoid over-spending/over-consuming/hoarding). I hoard my daughter's clothing instead. It's been that way since she was an infant. She's in high school now and I'm better, but not cured. She told me a few days ago that in grade school she was angry with me because she had so many clothes. I'm still processing that piece of information.
|
|
|
Post by hiding on Jul 25, 2015 19:33:04 GMT -5
doing another clothes purge. Every time I do this I get rid of more. But it often is a running battle with myself. I have seen the lists of what to keep,what not to keep. The lists are sensible. Some items are too worn out and damaged to be useful any longer. Those I can throw away without too many pangs. I threw away 7 bras the other night. Yes, I know 7 is more than some of you have all together. Have I mentioned that I hoard clothes?
I am now filling up donate bags. The garments that are particularly difficult are the ones that I either haven't worn at all or wore just a few times. Combine this with the money I spent and it is agonizing to let go. The more expensive, newer items I could try to sell online. However, I have looked into it and it seems to me to be more trouble and time than it is worth, to me.
I need some encouragement right now to continue on with this. Not only do I want a healthier relationship with my stuff. My partner is getting really impatient and angry. He has his own hoarding issues, but my overabundance of clothes is particularly getting to him.
|
|
|
Post by dtesposito on Jul 25, 2015 19:40:52 GMT -5
Hiding, I know the feeling of thinking you could get some money for something--and if you're short on cash, it's especially tempting to try. But, there seem to be so many problems with selling--if you go the local route, you have strangers coming over and trying to offer you less money than you wanted--plus, with clothing, are they going to ask to try things on before buying?
If you go the online route, you have to pay fees, sometimes whether the item sells or not. Then you'll have people who aren't happy with whatever it is because they didn't see it in person, and they'll want refunds.
Honestly, if you just throw everything into the donation bags and get it out of the house, it won't be long before you forget all about it. Sure it would be nice if there was an easy way to get money, but there really isn't. It'll be more productive to put your energy into clearing things out, and planning how to do better in the future to not buy excess. Just take amnesty for any mistakes in the past, agonizing over them will only slow you down.
Just picture how happy you'll be with a neat, organized closet and dresser that isn't stuffed full--it'll be worth it!
Diane
|
|
|
Post by hiding on Jul 25, 2015 20:48:32 GMT -5
Thanks for the encouragement, Diane! Right this minute I am going to go put that nice LL Bean coat into the donate bag. It's far better for someone else to get some wear and enjoyment out of it rather than it languishing ignored and unloved in my bursting closet.
The money is long gone. Yeah, I know. Sunk costs.
|
|
|
Post by angela on Jul 25, 2015 20:54:07 GMT -5
hiding, you are doing really well. DON'T try to sell things. The little bit of money you might gain is far outweighed by the difficulty in selling plus you will still have too much stuff in your closet! The ONLY criteria as far as I see it with clothes is, does it fit RIGHT NOW. Do I wear it RIGHT NOW. If the answer is no, then out it goes, by the fastest route possible! You are right at the most difficult point...letting it go... Don't let that pain stop you, prove to yourself that you can make the choice to move towards a peaceful, clutter free life.
|
|
|
Post by dtesposito on Jul 25, 2015 20:57:44 GMT -5
I am going to go put that nice LL Bean coat into the donate bag.
That's wonderful hiding, think how happy the recipient will be!
Diane
|
|
|
Post by hiding on Jul 25, 2015 22:04:07 GMT -5
I put the coat in the donate bag. No, the bag hasn't left the house yet. But once at item goes into the donate bag, I will not take it out again. I'm that disciplined at least. By the time something goes into my donate bag I am finished with the hand-wringing and arguing with myself. I have made a decision and it does stand.
|
|
|
Post by phoenixcat on Jul 26, 2015 9:35:54 GMT -5
Doing a bit of a clothes purge myself today. I have six bins that are sitting in the corner of my closet of clothes that I don't wear. A lot doesn't fit but it did last year Some is seasonal. Some is "retro" - I have things that are kind of cool if a niece or someone is invited to a disco party or a 50s sock hop 40s/50s stuff is from my mom. Going to try and get it down to 4 bins. Maybe 3 if I can find a way to fit my seasonal onto the regular closet shelves. Probably need a bit of a purge there too so it will fit. Cheering you on!! I think clothes are really tough because they are so full of favorable "possibilities". When I lose weight or when I do a small repair or if I go to Hawaii and need beach wear or in my case saving for a mythical party that my niece is going to get invited to PC
|
|